Back in Time
by Bmmonteith
Summary: Kagome is sent back in time by Naraku's spell gone wrong. She wanders the forest unaware, getting into trouble until she runs into a young Sesshomaru who is completely different from the man we all know. He takes her in for reasons unknown to himself, falling for her, a human, just like his father. *chapters 1-5 revised*
1. part 1

Part 1- _**REVISED**_

"Inuyasha! Sit! Sit, sit, sit! Don't follow me, I'll be back as soon as I can."

The snarl I held on my face disappeared with a yelp as I slammed into the ground, my body indenting deeper and deeper into the moist soil. I mumbled and cursed as I spat out the dirt wedged between my fangs. My body was sore and stiff from all the 'sit' commands as I yelled into the forest from the ground.

"Hey! I didn't say you could go home!"

I sulked as I sat up and brushed my robes off. Her scent had already faded, proving she really did leave. "Stupid Kagome… Going home whenever she feels like. Feh." I muttered and moaned over my new bruises, ignoring the growing unease in my stomach.

"Oh stop complaining Inuyasha. She will come back, she always does. Besides, we do need more supplies and some rest would be nice. Perhaps you should accompany her since we aren't like you. Our stamina isn't as high, and neither is our anxious energy." Miroku sat cross-legged against a tree, his hands wrapped delicately around a 'can of pop', as Kagome described it. "You walking around and complaining isn't helping us to relax."

"Yeah Inuyasha, humans aren't strong like us demons…. And you, they need a break."

I slapped my fist over Shippo's head as I glared at Miroku. I hated that he was right, hated it! "I know that! I'm not an idiot, and I will NOT go with her. I told her not to go. I told her, so I won't chase her home like some puppy. She can go through the well alone." I crossed my arms and settled myself in the crook of a tree, my attention focused on the leaves twitching in the small breeze.

"He could have fooled me, he's so stubborn." I heard Miroku whisper as Sango tried to stifle a giggle.

My face darkened as I fell from the tree, shouting the whole way down. "What was that monk? Say that to my face!" I landed in front of him, glaring down at him as he sipped his drink.

"Oh Inuyasha calm down! We're all on the same team here." Sango glared at me as she tickled Kiara's nose with a grass blade.

"Feh." I crossed my arms, sticking my nose in the air.

A strong odour stole my attention, my earlier anger forgotten as I scented the thickening air.

"Inuyasha."

"Yeah, I know." I smirked. "Naraku."

Sango jumped to her feet, her Hiraikotsu positioned dangerously in her strong hands. Kirara, who at one point was a cute kitten, evolved in a ball of fire to a large demon, her fangs dripping with saliva. She screamed her warning into the sky, the fire on her legs flaring, enhancing her menacing appearance. "Naraku? Why would he suddenly show himself, and so close to the village?"

"I don't know, but we have to hurry. Those Wolves and Sesshomaru won't be far behind when they catch drift of his scent." I flipped Shippo onto my shoulder as I turned to leave.

"Wait! What about Kagome. We can't just leave her. She could be back any moment, and we need her."

I eyed Miroku and scoffed. "Yes, we can. She chose to go home. Besides, she's probably spending time with her family. She won't be back for days. I know it. And besides, the well is in the opposite direction of Naraku. She is out of the way, so we move on without her."

I focused on Miroku for a second longer, expecting a verbal retaliation. He just smiled lightly. "You're right. She's safer there, isn't she?"

"Feh." I turned around and started running, my friends following closely behind. _'Yeah, Miroku, you're right. She is safer in her own world. I don't want to see my friend get hurt.'_

X***X

We ran through the trees, our eyes peeled for signs of danger, specifically in the form of a wind demoness. The smell of rancid miasma grew steadily stronger, and the trees slowly started to look more haggard and dead. We're getting closer.

"Inuyasha!" Sango fell from the sky on Kirara, her war apparel and her fearsome weapon traditional of demon slayers. She pointed ahead.

I nodded, but before I could respond, the earth shook with a thunderous clap. Trees fell, relieved to end their suffering as a miasma covered the ground in thick ropes, erupting from a fold in the heavens. The world darkened, leaving nothing but death and the evil aura.

A low laugh echoed out from the sky. "Inuyasha, welcome, it's been a while. And oh what is this? No Kagome wrapped around your arm? Well, that only puts a slight hitch in my plans."

"Naraku, What are you planning with Kagome?" I felt my heart beat faster at the mention of her name. My rage was building up.

"I am singularly the most powerful demon in these lands, and I would like to play a little game. But don't worry; it takes no effort on your part. I need but one player, and I've already decided who that is. I will be back for you, or, someone will. Until then, Inuyasha."

I roared into the sky as the miasma started to dissipate. My Tessaiga transformed into a massive fanged blade as I whipped it across the horizon. Four powerful energy waves shot up into the air, disappearing into nothing as Naraku's laugh slowly faded into the murky sky. I screamed up at the dusky clouds, my anger finding no other escape.

Sango grabbed my arm, her voice fairly soft; soothing, "Inuyasha?"

My sides heaved as I took deep breaths. I surveyed the land, how the grasses and trees were tormented and brown with death.

"I don't like the sounds of this. Who knows what he's planning, and to bring up Lady Kagome."

A swift gust of wind brought fourth fresh air to the otherwise stale valley. It was the sweet scent in the air that prickled my skin. "We need to get back to the well, now!"

"I can't allow you to do that."

X*****X

I grunted as I struggled to pull both myself and my bag out of the well. "Come on, come on, little more!"

With one final push both my bag and I flipped up and over the ledge, crushing the grass with our combined weight. I gave a quick sigh of relief. _'I should really get a ladder for this thing. Of course Inuyasha is usually here to get me by now.'_

I dusted myself off as I sat on the smooth wood, pushing a lock of hair behind my ear. I looked up into the sky, marveling at the beauty of it as I waited for Inuyasha to catch my scent. Our journey will resume.

X*****X

 **Part 1 Revised.** **Original is now put in a trash folder. These next revised chapters (5 in total) will really**

 **Be different as I've learned so much about my writing style and such,**

 **The story may have a different feel after this, and that's good.**

 **Enjoy!**


	2. part 2

Part 2- _**REVISED**_

X*****X

I glared at the woman before us. Her black hair and red eyes gave her a sinister look, but I knew her better than to give her that much credit.

"Kagura." I positioned myself between her and my friends as Shippo took refuge in Sango's waiting arms, "What are you doing here?"

"Oh I don't know. Naraku told me to keep you busy, so, here I am." Kagura sighed as she flexed her fan. "Well, since I am here, we may as well settle an old score hmm?" She smirked, lifting her fan to cover her blood red lips. She flipped her wrist, her voice ringing out over our newly defined battle space. "Dance of blades!"

I reacted solely on instinct, grabbing Miroku by his robes as I shoved him out of the path of the deadly barrage. Sango escaped with Shippo and Kirara.

"Quick puppy you are. Try this one." She whipped another torrent of blades towards me.

I dodged the attack, flipping my Tessaiga around my body as I brought it down on the ground. "Wind Scar."

The Wind Scar rushed at her, missing her as she bounced out of the way, landing softly on the charred dirt. "Oh really Inuyasha, you must try harder. Perhaps this will finish you. Dance of the Dragon!"

I bared my teeth as the tornados swept across the land. I thought of Kagome. My desire to protect her. The need to see her safe. That desire would help me end this fight quickly. It had to, she needed me.

X*****X

The peaceful glade was soon overlooked as I examined the same flower for the umpteenth time. Inuyasha never took this long to come and get me, never. "Is he really that mad at me for leaving?"

I picked up my bag and slung the over packed sack over my shoulders. _'Guess I'd better apologize. Though I wasn't the one being unreasonable.'_

I waked slowly and deliberately toward the village, enjoying sights that differed from the ones I grew up with. No buildings, no technology, no loud people, no… A snap in the trees caught my attention. "Inuyasha? Inuyasha, is that you? Sango, Shippo, Miroku?"

I grabbed my bow from the strings in my bag. "Who's there?"

A lean shadow slowly emerged from the confines of the brush. My breath caught in my throat. "Naraku."

He stood out from the trees with his brilliant white baboon cloak wrapped around his broad shoulders. His eyes pierced mine, keeping me in place. "Kagome. How nice to see you so… Alone."

I fought to keep my voice steady. "Naraku, what do you want?"

He clicked his tongue at me, wagging a single finger in shame. "Now Kagome, is that any way to greet somebody? Seems Inuyasha's bad manners are starting to wear off on you."

I sneered, fiddling with my quiver of arrows tied to my bag. The weapon was useless in my hands, I couldn't even free my arrows from the bag.

"Now, I wouldn't do that if I were you my dear." He appeared before me, his hands death gripping my bow. He ripped it from my grip and tossed it to the side. I fumbled back, dropping my backpack. If I needed to run, the bag would only hinder my movements.

"Kagome, I am in need of your assistance. I want Inuyasha to suffer, and you will help me achieve that."

"What makes you think I will help you?"

He laughed, his voice menacing and evil. "Kagome your naivety is not becoming. I'm not asking. I will conscript your services. Willingly or not."

I felt the heat drain from my flushed face. "Inuyasha, where are you?"

X*****X

I sat with my back to a tree; the tree. My breath caught in my raw throat as I stared into the empty forest. My friends gathered around me, their expressions both worried and fearful. After fighting Kagura, we hurried as fast as my injured body would let me. But. We weren't in time. Koga arrived shortly after us, his voice nagging and raging over Kagome's backpack, the contents spilled over the grass. Naraku got what he needed; what he wanted. I ignored the tender spots on my arms and shoulders, the pain growing with every second, both in and out. _'Where are you? Kagome?'_

My brain repeated the phrase over and over, determined to answer the question by repetition. Saying the same thing over and over won't help you solve it, but I was going to try.

I couldn't make my body follow my orders to stand. I nearly blacked out as my memory flashed.

~Kagura's Dance of The Dragon tore up the land, ripping and tearing at my flesh as it mangled the world around me. I remembered Sango and Miroku calling me. Kirara's scream as she transformed back after getting hit with the blast; she tried to save me. I looked at her wounded body, my mind unable to focus. Kagome needed me, but I couldn't reach her. I couldn't get to her. I couldn't even focus on Kagura. I growled in frustration, locking my knees as I used my now rusty blade to steady myself.

"Kagura. What is Naraku playing at?"

She glanced at the bushes, "Don't know, but I'm being watched. Now stay down like a good boy, you're wasting my time."

She sent a small gust of wind at me, the force knocking me back onto the ground. She stood over me, her fan poised for her finishing blow. Before she could attack, her face scrunched up with irritation and she jumped back, landing several yards away. The ground burst open, a crater occupying the space Kagura once did.

"I thought I smelled Naraku. Turns out it was just one of his reincarnations, Kagura."

"Hmm. Seems I'm out matched here."

She grabbed a feather from her hair, tossing it to the sky. She disappeared with the wind, her enlarged feather drifting higher as the Saimyosho flanked her.

I glared at the intruder. "You let her get away you dumb wolf!"

"At least I didn't let her beat me you scrawny mutt! Now, where's Kagome?" ~

I laid back in the grass, my vision spotty. I barely heard my friends whispering as my eyes drifted shut.

"… Shouldn't have left Kagome…."

"…Shouldn't have abandoned Kagome…"

X***X

The well was empty. Traces of her scent lingered here and there, but not enough of a lead to even come close to finding her. She was no longer around. I looked longingly at the well, Koga's pacing and huffing slowly grating on my already frayed nerves.

"Hey, dog breath. How could you lose her?"

My scowl deepened.

"I know you are weak and incompetent but to lose her at a time like this. If I was Kagome I wouldn't be caught dead with a mutt like you."

I moved with a speed that could match my brothers as I stood toe to toe with Koga. "You have a problem wolf? You want to fight?"

My face was dark, angry, but I could feel the fear and sadness creeping in.

He dropped his smug grin and took a step back. "You mean, you really don't know what happened to her?"

I kept my stare as he frowned. "You fool! If Kagome gets hurt I will have your head!" He retreated, returning to his pack who was waiting anxiously for him.

I sighed and fell to my knees, Kagome's backpack pressed tightly to my nose. Miroku and Sango knelt beside me. "Don't worry about him. Kagome is strong. She will be fine."

They tried to reassure me, but I could sense their anxiety. I could sense their fear; their blame. I heard the whispers, the subtle indications. Kagome was in real danger here, and I let it happen. Again.

X*****X


	3. part 3

Part 3- _**REVISED**_

' _It hurts. My whole body hurts. Why. Why does it?_ ' I moaned as the throbbing and aching in my bones grew more intense. I sucked in a breath through clenched teeth as a wave of nauseating pain rushed through me. I half growled half whimpered through the tremor, my sweat soaked body paralyzed by the pain. I tried to turn, to twist. My soaked bangs were plastered to my forehead as a gentle yet stern hand helped me roll to my side. I opened my mouth to speak but faltered as I choked, gagging on a cough that lit up my chest with knife like pain. I was too sick to worry about what I looked like as I proceeded to regurgitate everything that entered my body in the last few hours. I wept as I finally finished, my hot tears rolling thickly down my cheeks. I screwed my eyes tighter as another wave of pain flooded my veins. I cried out with the pain only to be hushed.

"Silence. It's alright, the pain will stop soon."

I nodded violently. _'I… I know that voice.'_

"Kikyo?" I whispered as I cracked an eye open. Her face was blank as ever, but her eyes were revealing. "I'm going to die?"

I don't remember hearing her response. I don't remember passing out. I just remember seeing her eyes flash with empathy; with pity as I shuddered and lost myself in the pain.

X*****X

Her scent was faint, none existent in places even, but we searched relentlessly. I jumped from treetop to treetop as Kirara flew lazily above me with the others. I spoke less and less about our path as we got closer to the end of the trail. I growled low and deep, my chest vibrating with my anger. _'How could she just vanish like that? People don't just vanish. Obviously this is Naraku's doing. Damn you Naraku, when I get my hands on you. Kagome, hold on. We're coming for you.'_

I stopped, a signal to the others to rest. I heard their unanimous relieved sigh. I slumped down on the nearest branch and closed my tired eyes. Images of Kagome danced behind my eyes and through my head as I regretted letting her go alone to the well for the hundredth time.

X***X

"Inuyasha! Will you stop pacing already?" Miroku shouted at me as he forced me to the ground.

"Miroku, what the hell are you doing?" I was flat on my face, the monk sitting heavily on my back.

"Stop pacing, you're giving me a headache. Either go back to your tree or sit quietly. Got it?"

"But Kagome…" Miroku cut me off as he stood and hauled me up.

"Inuyasha, enough is enough. You're making us more nervous. They can't take that right now. You have to stay strong. For them Inuyasha. For them, and Kagome."

I glanced around, noticing how Sango and Shippo sat quietly at the edge of the river. They didn't laugh; they were hardly even talking. I saw how Sango's shoulders appeared more ragged than normal, like a great weight was placed upon them. I noticed how Kirara stood guard next to Sango, her whines quiet and almost inaudible. Almost.

I grunted with his brashness. ' _But I am nervous. She isn't with me and she isn't home. I'm having a hell of a time tracking her and I don't know if she is even okay. Keh, if only she knew how much pain she was causing me. She wouldn't go home for a month.'_

I smiled at the thought of us back together. Hell I would even be happily sat if that meant she was here. That she was okay.

"It's not that simple. I can't even track her. Her scent was too scattered, now it's gone. I don't know how Naraku did it, but she is just gone. I can't get a read on her." I fell back to the ground. I crossed my arms as Miroku sat down next to me.

"Well, there is always one person we could ask to help, but… You won't like it. Not at all."

I grimaced. "No. But I'll do it for Kagome." If she trusts him, then I guess I have to.

I watched Sango saunter back to our camp with Shippo in tow. They had a small bounty of fish and ramen cups from Kagome's bag. My heart sank a little further.

X*****X

My body. I can't feel my body. But, I could see. I could see visions and terrors running wild across the clearing. They proceeded to swim across the black sky tainted with purple miasma; much like purple clouds. I darted my eyes back and forth, fear enveloping me as the demons swirled at me closer and closer, like a coy trying to nip the water's surface. I closed my eyes, trying to hide from the visions. They remained; they were there no matter what I did. They brushed past me and I'm sure they were close enough to touch me if they hadn't already. I tried not to gag on the rancid breath of rotted meat that spilled from the demons. I held my… Held my what? _'Am I even breathing? Can I breathe? Oh my god. What is happening?'_

I panicked as I tried to move my limbs. The ground melted out from under me; and I couldn't move. I couldn't even feel myself breathing; living. The gentle reminder of life my lungs presented, taken for granted any other day. The world started to fragment apart and I was falling into black; falling away from the nightmare. I hit the ground hard and was instantly surrounded by a warm glow ruminating from inside my wounded body. I was back, though the pain that came with it was enough to keep my lungs from catching their lost breath. Now I really wasn't breathing. I choked. Gentle yet forceful hands worked ferociously to help me. But, I don't know if they were in time. I made a pitiful squeak, not even sure if I was heard, before I fell back into unconsciousness.

I once again was thrust into my nightmare, but this time, I watched things play out backwards. I felt the hands pull away and I could feel myself being pushed off the ground, flying out of the hole I fell into. I watched the demons retreat and I could feel the throbbing pain weaken and lessen. I could feel my body strengthen and forget the painful miasma that had entered me. Dead or alive, it was better than the pain my mortal body was feeling.

X*****X


	4. part 4

Part 4 – _ **Revised**_

X*****X

The trees rustled in the still air, their leaves dancing to a foreboding force. Kikyo watched on as Kagome tossed and turned, an agitating miasma in her veins destroying her internally.

She pursed her lips, confused. "My antidotes aren't working. I can't purify this poison. It's…Something feels different. Kagome, are you strong enough to live? Can you overcome this?"

She wondered aloud as she eyed the glade. The many soul collectors in her service started to shrink and fall to the ground as they neared the place Kagome laid. The many souls they had collected floated up into the sky, gone from sight. Kikyo watched as the soul collectors aged backwards, their once large bodies falling to the ground as nothing more than larva of what they once were.

X***X

The dark sky glowed a sinister blue over Kagome. She whimpered, her face contorted in agony. A sudden blinding light reverberated throughout the clearing, blinding Kikyo as Kagome squeaked a sad sound. She reached towards Kagome as her final words, which were not even real words, were grunted through her hard pressed lips. She reached her hands out to steady a pulsating Kagome. Kikyo's body shuddered before she disappeared; before Kagome was just, gone. Her eyes widened and her hands started to shake.

"In all my years as a priestess, nothing has taken me by surprise. I never felt this kind of fear. Oh Kagome. What have I done?"

Kikyo started to shake violently as she fell backwards. She wiped her sweaty palms on the red fabric she donned. Her soul collectors raced through the clearing on her command as she increased the security of her barrier. Kagome's disappearance shook the apathetic priestess, leaving her fearful.

"People don't just disappear."

X*****X

I pouted, so Kagome would have called it, as Miroku chastised me for the last time.

"Come on Inuyasha, be calm. We can't find her on our own; you haven't had a solid trace of her for a while now. I know Kouga can help us. I know you know it too."

I crossed my arms, annoyed with Miroku's genius. I had to agree. I don't like him, I never have, but Kagome seems to trust him, so I have to do the same. I closed my eyes, my senses tuned to her; Kagome. I could see her in my mind, her smile, her laugh. I could imagine her scent, how she calmed me, even if I didn't show it. "Yes, I know. But I don't have to like it." I glared at the wolf staring smugly at our group. I put on a smile as we stalked towards them. _'Great. Just, great.'_

X***X

I spied the wolf I was looking for, and he spied me. He sat nonchalantly against a tree, his eyes closed in mock relaxation. I could sense how tense he was.

"Oy wolf."

He cracked his eye open, "Hey dog breath, what do you want?" He repositioned, closing his eyes again.

My face turned red, embarrassed as his lips twitched with amusement. _'Cocky bastard, joking at a time like this.'_

Miroku answered for me, thankfully. "Actually, we were here to ask for your help Kouga. It seems that Kagome's scent has just disappeared, and the last we could trace of it was in this direction. We were hoping you may have an idea of what is going on." He sat on the grass near Kouga.

Kouga opened his piercing blue eyes. "So you lost her scent too. We were getting close. I could sense her plain as day, and she just… She was just gone. Her scent, everything; I could only smell remains."

I gulped as I flopped down, my legs crossed and my Tessaiga held behind my crossed arms. "Did you say remains?"

He looked at me, all hostility in his eyes vanishing, "Yah, graveyard soil and bones."

Sango shuddered, "Inuyasha, do you think…?"

I shook my head, "No, Kikyo wouldn't. She and Kagome may not be friends, but she wouldn't go that far." I was confident in my answer, but my stomach continued to flip. ' _You wouldn't do that, would you Kikyo?_ '

Koga stood tall, his muscular form full of electricity. "Alright, let's go find this priestess of yours."

"Damn," I muttered as my face flushed. "Kikyo. You will know what happened. But, will you let us find you?"

X***X

Our target was obvious. The spiritual energy radiating off her barrier was a beacon in the dark. I felt my skin prickle as we stood outside the barrier. Kirara and Shippo groaned in discomfort, but were otherwise unharmed.

"Kikyo is just beyond here. The spiritual energy is intense, but we aren't being purified. I don't understand." Kouga reached out to the barrier, his hand dipping into the transparent wall.

Miroku responded as we gingerly stepped into it. "She must have been expecting us. But, judging by the power of this barrier, I doubt any other creature could enter, demon or human."

The air grew colder as we walked deeper into her lair. The sounds of the forest grew distant and silent. Only our breathing was heard. We knew we were nearing her when several soul collectors wrapped around us, urging us to walk quicker, deeper into her hideout.

"Inuyasha, you came." The voice was small and weak, fearful.

"Kikyo."

X*****X

 **I'm sorry. I had some information from Kikyo's perspective that I felt was extremely important and I only wanted to do Inuyasha, Kagome and Sesshomaru's POV's. So, I tried a third person perspective, just to get that information out there. I don't like doing it but I couldn't think of a better way to tell you those parts. It's the only way we would have known Kagome disappeared, creatures aged backwards around her (alluding to the fact that she is time traveling) and that Kikyo was trying to help. Forgive that little blip in perspective, it should be regular from this point on.**


	5. part 5

Part 5 _**–REVISED**_

The trees grew close together, almost as though they were growing just for us; to trap us and bring us together. The thick trunks were covered in layers of moss and the branches grew both high and wide. Kikyo sat in the middle of the grouping of trees, her face laced with worry. "Inuyasha. You came."

She sounded relieved to see me; she sounded sincere. I looked around, hoping for a clue to Kagome. Not even a scent. "Kikyo."

All I could say was her name. For years I had dreamt of her as I was under the sealing spell. For all the years I traveled with Kagome; every time I glanced at her, I thought of Kikyo, and here she was. Kagome wasn't, she wouldn't know; wouldn't have to know _. 'I don't know what to do. Why should I feel so guilty for what I want? Kagome. What will happen when we find you? Do I have to keep denying myself what I crave, what is always so far from my reach? Is it destined to be my fault for loving another woman? To be criticized for my first love? I'll always care about you, but I could never love you the way you want me to. I love… Kikyo.'_

I coughed, ignoring the thoughts as they sped through my head. I looked away, embarrassed. Kouga caught my eye, only blinking. He knew. He knew what I was thinking.

"Kikyo. Have you seen Kagome?" Miroku was straight to the point, leaving all greetings and formalities aside.

Her attitude seemed to have changed, her snide side curbed. "She was just here."

My eyes flashed as I stepped towards Kikyo, my sleeves flaring as I moved in haste. I practically screamed in her face, "Where did she go?"

X***X

Kikyo recounted her tale, holding off our questions 'till the end. It was an uncomfortable experience, having to remain passive until she finished. She recalled to us how she saw Kagome stumbling through the trees, poison seeping from various punctures in her flesh; from her mouth. She recalled the horror in Kagome's eyes as she fell to the ground, pained and anguished. Kikyo closed her eyes tightly.

"She was speaking erratically. Her words were rushed and made no sense. Her eyes were wide open, like she was seeing terrors through glazed eyes. I tried. I tried to help her, to extract the poison. But I couldn't hold her still. I couldn't purify it, it was, different. I… I couldn't do it." Kikyo looked away, ashamed. "She spoke in riddles, rants and raves. I didn't know what she was talking about, what she meant. She just kept one phrase throughout the ordeal, 'I will not help you. You will not win. I will not hurt him.'"

She looked up into our eyes; my eyes. The depth to her was surprising. It didn't used to be like this. She used to be so much more guarded. I never seen her this vulnerable.

She stared at me as she spoke once more, "She finally passed out, and, the next moment, she just, was gone. Gone."

Sango broke the contact between Kikyo and I; "How could she just disappear?"

Kikyo shook her head slowly, sadly. "I don't know. She was in shock. She was dying, she wasn't going to survive the poison and she knew it. She mumbled something and in a flash of white, warm light, she was gone."

I looked at my companions. ' _Dying. Kagome was dying?'_

I couldn't accept that. I won't accept that. Kagome won't die; didn't die.

Kikyo huffed, "In all my life I never encountered one as strange as this young priestess. She truly was a different girl."

I felt my skin prickle, my face flushing. I spoke before I could stop myself. "Don't speak of her as though she is dead. She is not dead!"

I stormed out of the clearing, my head so full of questions, concerns; worries. Kagome. I ran as far as I could before I hit the ground, tears blurring my fist as I beat the ground over and over. "Come back Kagome, come back!"

X*****X

I felt like I had been sleeping for years, though I was tired as ever. I exhaled, tearing up at the feeling of life going in and out of my chest. I cracked my eyes open, noting the dark sky and the many sparkling stars. I looked around; the world seemed different. Less sinister and more care free. I looked around for the body that was attached to the hands that helped me. No one. "H-hello?"

I called out as I sat in the dirt, my voice cracking and splitting. I stretched my stiff limbs, tiny cracks and pops echoing in my head as the bones realigned. I stood awkwardly and alone in the clearing. I had to find Inuyasha. I had to find my friends.

X*****X

I knew he was here. I knew Koga followed me, but I made no point in acknowledging that. The sun had long since faded from the sky, leaving the moon to shine high. I remembered how Kagome would always look at the sky, amazed at the sights her homeland of Tokyo never offered.

His insistent voice broke my thoughts, my memories, "Inuyasha, don't ignore me. You can't just run off. We need to figure out how to get Kagome back."

I growled, my tears long since dried up. "Just, back off wolf. Leave."

He sat beside me in the grass, silent. I sighed after several long seconds. "I shouldn't have let her go home alone."

He looked at me but I didn't look back. "You have to stop blaming yourself for this."

"But why? It's my fault isn't it? Is it not? Correct me if I'm wrong but I know you blame me. Sango, Miroku, Shippo, they do too. Even I blame me. It is my fault. I couldn't protect her, you guys were right. You were all right." I buried my face in my hands.

"Inuyasha…"

"No, Kouga. You can't change this. You can't fix it…"

"Will you shut up and listen to me you stupid mutt. Kagome isn't gone, she just can't be. We have to find her. We can all find her, but, things can't go back to normal when we do."

I looked up, curious, "What do you mean, normal?"

He sighed, "I saw the way you looked at Kikyo. It's the same look I give to Kagome. You can't keep stringing her along for your own benefit."

I frowned but he cut me off before I could counter, standing with his hands haphazardly on his hips.

"And no, Inuyasha. I don't want Kagome for myself. I did, but that was a long time ago. She doesn't love me. She will never love me, Inuyasha. She loves you. But you can't keep making her feel like you love her back. You have to choose, and I think your choice is pretty damn clear."

He grabbed my arm and pulled me to my feet, shoving me to show the moment was over.

"You're right. You're right, I still love Kikyo."

X*****X

 **So, I'm trying to keep as much of the original story parts as possible, though quite a bit was lost actually. When I cut the other POV's that weren't Kagome and Inuyasha I lost a lot of emotion and meat to the story that their thoughts otherwise brought. I still think it's pretty good considering, and this is the last revised chapter for now. From here on out we will no longer be connected to the past, but to Kagome and Sesshomaru's story.**

 **Thank you for your patience in this delicate transition, haha just wanted to say that.**


	6. part 6

**Hiya. Not sure how the story will play out from here. Maybe it will just be Kagome's P.O.V or perhaps we will flash back over to Inuyasha and friends. Undecided. But, the wheels of my mind keep turning. Let's see where it takes us shall we.**

Part 6;

Where was I going? The dark that had settled in since I had been out changed the very layout of the world. Up could have been down, left could be back and right could have been turn around. I had no sense of direction whatsoever. _'Hmm, it's no different than the first time I got here. The first time I went through the well.'_

I laughed, talking to the trees around me, "I was just as lost then as I am now." Only this time, I knew what I was looking for, and avoiding.

My smile faded as I looked to the sky, memories rushing to the surface, "Help." My face crumpled, tears starting to show in the corners of my eyes, though no one was here to see them. I whispered before sitting at the roots of a larger tree, sheltered from the world, "Help."

xXxXxXxXxXxXx

My hair was a mess, my eyes were red and puffy. I was sore from laying curled in a ball all night, and I shivered despite the suns warmth. I wiped my face, erasing the tired, but not the fact that I slept on the ground. I was stained with the damp soil, my white blouse now blotchy. I smoothed my appearance over as best I could before walking on, looking for anything that was familiar.

I heard loud clanks and men shouting orders. I veered off, heading straight for them, hoping more than anything that I would recognize them. I edged closer to the tree line, peering out at the disturbed land in the clearing. Several men exhausted themselves with spades as they dug down into the virgin soil while others sawed chunks of wood and gathered stones. I watched them work for a moment, all labouring over an unidentifiable creation.

It hit me hard, realization and horror. It was the well. It was THE well, my ticket home! _'What are they doing? Are they taking it apart! Why are they deconstructing it?'_

I ran without thinking, yelling at the men. I ignored everything I saw, everything that would have hinted to me that no, they were not destroying my well; but making it.

"Wait stop! What are you doing to the Bone-eaters well?!"

The men stopped their work and stared at me. Hushed whispers moving down the ranks.

"What's this now?"

"Is she a demon?"

"…Weird clothes…"

"Stop her, she must be a demon." One man yelled above the others. They all listened instantly, and were barreling down upon me.

I stepped back, then turned and ran, "I! Am! Not! A! Demon!" I screamed at them as I jumped through the trees, retracing my steps _. 'Wait, if that's the well, then the village must be nearby! Kaede can help me!'_ I veered off, but they were right close. I could almost feel their hands on my arms as my lungs burst. I can't keep going.

My body gave out suddenly, leaving me face planting on the ground with mouth full of dirt and scraps up my cheeks. My head was fuzzy, spinning as I sat up on my hands and knees. I swooned again, falling flat on my side, grunting as I hit the ground _. 'Ugh, the poison. It must still be in me.'_

I scrunched my face, trying to make the world stop. It only went faster. I felt rough hands grab my arms, binding them behind my back. They hoisted me up, laying me over one of their broad shoulders. "Stop. Put me down. Oh I'm going to be sick."

I held back the urge to gag; not as though anything would come out. I could see them staring as we strode to town, pointing at my 'strange' clothes and my frazzled hair. I hung limp, letting my legs swing back and forth.

I had my eyes closed when we entered town, the sounds were lifting and promising. I looked up as they dropped me hard on the ground. I peered into the hut in front of which I was dropped. A woman stepped out, her black hair pulled back into a low ponytail. She had a bow strapped to her back and a quiver of arrows hanging lazily from her shoulder. "Kikyo?"

I was pushed down, held by the shoulder and ground into the dirt, "Do not speak demon."

It was harsh, but I listened, silencing my tongue.

"Lady Natame! We found her near the well. She tried to stop us. We believe she is a demon."

I peeked up from my position in the dirt, 'Natame?'

"She be not a demon my friend, let her up. Where are ye from child?"

She looked much like Kikyo, though spoke exactly like old Kaede. Her features were slightly askew, the differences between her and Kikyo becoming more evident. I felt a rush of Déjà vu as I explained where I was from as I sat up. "Tokyo."

"Ah Tokyo. And is this, Tokyo, far from here? What brings ye to our village? We are but small people with little to offer."

I closed my eyes, _'Okay, okay, okay. This is… I'm so confused.'_

"Would you believe me if I told you… I was supposed to come through that well you are building?"

She frowned, a snark retort sharp on her tongue. She was not amused. She was a lot like Kikyo. More serious than her sister Kaede. Before she could snap it at me, someone in the village screamed.

"Demon! There's a demon in the village!"

She hummed, irritated, "Inuyasha."


	7. part 7

Part 7;

The way she looked at me was unforgiving. Her mouth turned down at the corners and her eyes blankly staring at me. When that small voice rang out over the village, I went stiff for a moment. My head flashed with memories from my first interrogation. Mistress Centipede, Kaede, Inuyasha and the jewel. I closed my eyes. All this déjà vu was giving me a headache.

Natame rolled her eyes at me as she turned to one of the village men. "She be a smart girl. Bring her with; I don't want her running off and causing trouble. I not be done with her just yet."

Lady Natame, or priestess I should say, took off, her steps large and forceful. I was lifted up by the arm, my wrists still bound behind my back. We followed her closely, other villagers gathering behind us with their weapons to march. What I saw next, broke my heart.

XxXxXx **X** xXxXxX

He stood at the center of the field, children with their parents forming a half circle around him. Several children cried as they nursed scratches up and down their forearms. He held a little round ball out to them with a confused smile, urging them to play. He only got screams and shouts back. They cursed him; they threw stones and sticks at him, shouting harsh and ignorant statements. He instantly dropped the ball, shamed for a reason that was foreign to him.

"Half breed!"

"Go back to the forest with the rest of the filth!"

"Dirty dog, get out of here! We don't want your kind here."

The statements were abrasive and painful, shouted one after the other, hitting him like slaps and punches. He was a child, but they didn't seem to care. My eyes watered, he was so young; too young to deserve this much hatred.

I flopped to the ground, unnoticed by my guards. I pulled at my restraints, managing to maneuver my arms around my back end and out from under my legs. I stood up quickly; watching as Priestess Natame only allowed the behaviour to continue. Disgusting. _'Is this how his whole life has been? It's… I couldn't imagine.'_

His little ears twitched at every word. His body cowered at every object that found its mark. His eyes watered with every insult. He stood still, taking the abrasive language that was thrown at him.

"Oh Inuyasha."

I pushed through the crowd that had gathered, breaking through the wall of hate. I heard Natame's distinct voice shouting at me, at her men to grab me, but I ignored her.

"Stop! Stop this! This is barbaric!" I shouted at the mass. They only sneered at me, redirecting their comments. ' _Good, at least they are focusing on me.'_

"I knew she was different!"

"Half demon lover!"

"Is she this creature's mother?"

The villagers were dark with their words, continuing to throw whatever they could grab; stray rocks, sticks, clumps of dirt and vegetables. I wrapped my still bound hands around the little hanyou and sprinted away from the village. It was nothing like I remembered, but was anything here? Was anything going to make sense, or was I going to have to resettle in the feudal era?

I ran through the trees, through what was known as the forest of Inuyasha where I was from. I don't even know if this place has a name now. I looked at the little boy in my arms, aware of his apprehension about what I was doing. He clutched my shirt tightly, his free hand rubbing the dirt and tears from his face.

"I'm so sorry little Inuyasha."

xXxXx **X** xXxXx

I'm not sure how long or far I ran, but when I stopped, I fell. I hit the ground, first my knees then my hands. The soft grass didn't completely protect my skin as it ground into my flesh, leaving little green grass stains on my skin. I groaned, "Oh why do I keep hurting myself?"

I sat back, my legs tucked under me, and then I caught my first glimpse of him. He... He was so little. So innocent. I smiled just thinking about how; here I am, sitting with my best friend, a child no less. I thought about the Inuyasha I knew. Here, he was different. He wasn't carved so roughly by the hatred and situations he had been through. He was a polished stone ready for wear, not already worn. His life has so much potential right now. He could grow up to be so different. Only… I know no one will give him that chance, and if he did, would I ever get to meet him?

"Why are you staring at me?"

He looked at me with his golden orbs, curiosity present on his sad suspicious face. I smiled at him; "you look so much like someone I know."

"Mamma said I was unique… That I am special."

"Ah, your mother is a smart lady. You are Inuyasha. You are more special than you know."

He smiled quickly, flashing his teeth. He looked at my bound hands, flexing his own, his claws exposed. He stepped to me quickly, slashing the ropes effortlessly before retreating several feet. He stood near a tree, ready to run should I prove to be hostile.

"Thank you Inuyasha."

"How… How do you know my name?"

I parted my lips, no answer on the tip of my tongue. "Oh, well, I heard the priestess in the village say it." It wasn't a lie.

He just looked at me, is little hands pulled into his fire rat robe. He was a perfect miniature version of the man I know. _'How is this possible?'_

A deep, familiar voice interrupted my thoughts, "Inuyasha. Interesting seeing you here, and with this…Human, no less."

I stood up quickly. I know who this is. I recognized the voice of the man that so tormented Inuyasha; that tried to kill me and Inuyasha countless times. I didn't think, I just reacted. I jumped up and grabbed Inuyasha in my arms, running as fast and far as my still tired legs would carry me. I know I couldn't outrun the demon. He was much too fast for that, but, I couldn't leave Inuyasha behind. _'You will not hurt him Sesshomaru. He is too innocent for any of your crap this time.'_

* * *

 ** _I hope my story is being enjoyed so far, I am having a blast writing this one. It's just so fun to see what comes out of this head of mine.  
As always, constructive criticisms are always enjoyed and encouraged, so if you have something you would like to say, either a criticism or compliment, please review! If you don't want to, that's all cool too!_**

 ** _Thank you all!_** ** _  
_**

 ** _:-_** ** _3_**


	8. part 8

Part 8;

I had no hope of outrunning him, so my logic in stealing Inuyasha away was flawed, majorly. He cried out in surprise, his tiny voice screaming no particular words. I flinched at the piercing sounds, but kept going. Then he did the strangest thing. He… He called out to Sesshomaru for help and howled, much like a dog; a pup in distress.

I was surprised at his desperation to get away from his savior and back to his murderous half-brother. He tried to push me away with his tiny clawed hands, but I held him too tightly. I still didn't stop. I didn't even look over my shoulder as I knew he was right on my heels.

I allowed myself one quick glance, one quick peek over my shoulder; what a mistake. The moment I turned my head, I ran smack into him; right into his chest. He reached his arm out to grab Inuyasha, letting me land on the ground at his feet. I didn't even get a chance to let out a sigh before I was off the ground again, dangling inches above the solid earth. He held me by the collar of the shirt with ease. And in his eyes, all I saw was rage. It was something I had never seen before. _'Sesshomaru has… feelings?'_

 _XxXxXxX_

I gasped in his grip, clutching at his arm and gripping the muscled limb tightly. I lifted my legs, hitting at his chest and stomach, only entertaining an annoyed growl from his already agitated self.

"Inuyasha. I told you to stay."

He addressed Inuyasha as though I was not even there, looking past me and into the eyes of the pup I hid. There was no response, just a small whimper of what I thought was an apology.

"Leave him alone Sesshomaru, you cause him enough harm as it is! You don't need to ruin his whole childhood too!"

He tossed me to the ground as I spoke, kneeling beside me with his hand pressed firmly to my neck. He didn't even blink when I spoke. He just looked at me. He just stared into my eyes. I felt my face turn hot, suddenly aware of how far my shirt had ridden up my body. I struggled to lower the stubborn fabric as he leaned on me. He only squeezed my neck harder. I started to see stars, staring into his liquid gold eyes as the darkness creeped upon my vision. I could hear Inuyasha plea for him to stop, beg him to let me up; which to my surprise he complied with. Inuyasha's pleas for him to stop was the only thing that saved me.

xXx **X** xXx

I awoke to what I thought was only a few minutes later. Turns out, it was more like a few hours. The sun had started falling down behind the trees, layering the land in another orange blanket. A whole day. I wasted a whole day being tossed and thrown about by everyone I had met. I blinked my eyes several times, my neck sore and stiff. I rubbed the tender flesh, "I'm so going to have a bruise."

My voice was hoarse, no more than a whisper, but he heard it; his demon senses strong and keen.

"You are awake, young Miko."

My spine tingled, but I had no reason to fear. If he was going to kill me, I would not be here. I sat up slowly, not wanting to spark another attack out of him. He sat by a small fire, Inuyasha curled tiredly on his lap. He watched me, the fire leaving shadows to dance around his fine face. His eyes were cold, but I could see the warmth that flashed in them when he glanced down at his half-brother. His fluff was wrapped around the sleeping pup in his arms. It was then that I decided Sesshomaru had nothing but love for this hanyou. Then that I knew I had to figure out what went wrong between the two.

He hissed, tipping his head towards a water jug by my side.

"Drink. Then speak. I want answers from you young Priestess. And I want them now."

* * *

 **Hope this chapter was okay!**


	9. part 9

Part 9:

XxXx **X** xXxX

I stood in the trees behind the woman, watching her. Her hard landing was neither graceful nor painless, indicated by her groans and complaints. I observed how she interacted with Inuyasha carefully; she didn't seem to be hostile towards him. She wasn't like the other humans I had seen, though gave me no reason to believe otherwise.

I stepped out of my hiding place, standing behind her as she lost herself in thought. I eyed her more closely, noting the way she sat crouched. Her black raven hair hung loosely down her back and her odd clothes clung to her body, showing her figure. I shook the images from my head, ashamed of thinking such things. I started speaking involuntarily; the words tumbling from my mouth before I could stop them.

"Inuyasha. Interesting seeing you here, and with this…Human, no less."

She went cold. I could sense it, and I could see her back go ridged. I didn't mean to startle her. I really didn't, but she took off before I could appologize, stealing Inuyasha away with her. I watched her race through the trees, feeling something stirring up inside of me. It happened before I could stop it.

I had her by the collar, hanging inches off the ground. She kicked at me, but I wouldn't let go. I couldn't make myself let go. My Instincts took over, and I could only work around them. I scolded Inuyasha while trying to regain control. She spoke; berating me, and I threw her down, kneeling beside her thin body. I noticed how she struggled under my iron grip like a wounded animal and I lost it. I watched as I almost killed her. Watched as she slowly started to fade.

Inuyasha grabbed me, his begging and pleas for me to stop the only thing that calmed me. He was okay; the only thing that mattered. My instincts to protect my family's young started to fade, and I released my grip on her. She fell into unconsciousness as I sat back, confused as to why I was regretting what I had done.

XxXx **X** xXxX

Just because Inuyasha convinced him to spare me once, did not mean he was going to do it again. I jumped when he pointed to the water and commanded me to drink. I grabbed the jug by my side with both hands, letting the cool liquid run down my dry throat. I took several large gulps, effectively emptying the container. I closed my eyes, basking in the life prolonging powers of a simple drink of water. I had caught his eye before I closed mine, the way he calmly waited for me was astounding. He was curious of me, as I was him. I could so tell, and was actually both eager and nervous to explain myself to him.

The water worked its way quickly into my system and I instantly perked up. I sat a little taller, placing the container on the ground and folding my hands in my lap to keep them from fidgeting. I took a deep breath to calm myself as I stared at him, willing him to ask his questions.

He said nothing, but I waited. It would be a lie to say I waited patiently, but I did wait. We sat in a stony silence for several moments, his gaze focused between me and Inuyasha. I was the same way, glancing both down to the little boys sleeping face and back up to him. I couldn't help but linger my gaze on Sesshomaru's face. His royal purple strips down his smooth cheeks; his golden eyes soft and affectionate, yet hard and blood thirsty. The way his hands wrapped protectively around Inuyasha and his hair hung long and flowing. I rested my gaze on the crescent moon on his forehead, ending my search of him at his eyes. He was looking at me; he noticed. I didn't want him to notice.

"Miko, I am questioning of your reasons for treating my half-brother like you have, and why you tried to steal him away."

I looked at him confused. Was this his first question? "I, I don't understand. What do you mean? I didn't do anything to Inuyasha and I stole him so you could not hurt him."

He curled his lip slightly in disgust. "Hurt a pup. Hnn… You humans sure have some questionable thoughts and theories regarding demons. We are not all monsters Priestess"

I didn't know what to say. The way he danced around his words and used emotion; it was so indirect and personal compared to what I was used to. "I didn't mean any offense Sesshomaru."

"What you meant or didn't mean, it doesn't matter. What is said is said and what is done is done. You can't change that with a few poorly said sentiments. I suggest thinking before you answer my questions."

I felt my face go red and stood up, anger flooding my body. "Well you don't have to be so rude you know! Maybe a thank you is in order for the simple fact that I saved your brother from an angry mob! Or an apology for almost killing me!"

I yelled at him. I yelled at Sesshomaru Lord of the West; the man known to lay an army flat for just looking at him the wrong way. I didn't even care. I was lost. I was confused. I was somehow further into the past of the Feudal Era, and it was all Naraku's fault. The man probably doesn't even exist yet. Sango, Miroku, not even Shippo. No one I know exists here, only this young Inuyasha and a confusing Sesshomaru. I looked at him with the dirtiest look I could muster, letting all my frustration out on him.

He didn't respond to my rant. His eyes were fiery; his emotions not at all concealed under his normally bland veil.

I decided to push him one more time, almost hopeful for a reaction. "And, to top it all, if you really cared for him, why would you leave him alone in a dangerous forest, knowing that people and demons alike… Dislike half demons?"

His face suddenly changed, all the emotions he had building up inside draining from his eyes, leaving nothing but the liquid gold pools to turn frosty. "That is none of your concern Miko."

He spoke with a forced tone, a tone that was covering something; sorrow. He looked down at Inuyasha, and back to me, changing the subject.

"You are not from here. You, do not belong here. If you were, you would have known better than to touch a son of the West. Where are you from?" His eyes took on a spark.

"You wouldn't understand. No one would understand." I dropped my nasty look as I flopped to the ground, finding it hard to be angry at him. "Everything here is wrong."

He squinted at me, but didn't push the subject further. He spoke instead, answering my questions.

"I didn't leave him unattended. I was called away… I was summoned. He couldn't come with me. Not this time."

He looked past me. Something in his eyes wasn't quite right; they went dark, losing their luster. "Inuyasha is, as you humans would call it, an orphan."

XxXx **X** xXxX


	10. part 10

**Hi all, please, please, please let me know if the different POV's between Sess and Kags is good or just annoying. I can try to make that a little better if it's confusing. I just like showing how each responds to the situations but that's just me. Also thanks for the reviews, they make me smile pretty good! Thanks guys!** **:-3**

Part 10;

I watched her stir, her body finally waking up. She rubbed her neck gracefully, flinching ever so slightly. I felt a twinge deep inside, regretful of injuring the delicate beauty. She whispered, low enough I couldn't quite hear her words but loud enough I could just hear her soft voice. I greeted her, letting her know she was not alone. Her movements were still stiff, but she did not shiver at my voice this time. I took it as a good sign.

She looked at me and stood slowly. _'She is still fearful of me. I would be too.'_

I considered asking her if she was okay, but decided against it. Instead, I tried to shut down my emotions and to hollow myself out. I needed to get answers from her. I made my eyes dark and my face blank, only to have my concentration broken by the hanyou as he shifted in his sleep, moaning. I looked at him, the cold exterior I had set up melting away.

I noticed she stared at me, probably seeing the change in attitude, so I hissed, startling her. I pointed at the jug beside her feet, ordering her to drink in the best commanding voice I could find. She was all too willing to listen.

I watched her and waited patiently for her to be done. She sat back in ecstasy as she finished the last drop, her eyes closed in her joyous high. She seemed to become more aware, more willing to cooperate.

We stared at each other for a long while, her impatience showing terribly. I held in a smirk, and took this chance to examine her features. I looked back and forth between her and Inuyasha. I watched as her large brown eyes sparkled at me and her lips twitched with unspoken words. Her hair hung messily, yet still beautifully around her face and her legs were tucked perfectly under her body. I noticed as she did the same thing, her eyes grazing over me subtly yet completely.

I questioned her, her answers throwing up flags in my mind. She had the same point of view as all the others. _'She took him so I would not hurt him. Why would she think I would hurt him?_ '

I spat my retort back at her, making sure she knew she was wrong and that I was angry. "Hurt a pup. Hnn… You humans sure have some questionable thoughts and theories regarding demons. We are not all monsters Priestess"

She looked away and apologized quietly. Apologies couldn't fix how humans perceived us. We are not animals. We are not monsters, at least not all of us. I would never hurt a member of my own pack, no matter how far above them I am in rank. That is not how our pack runs. "…I suggest you think before answering my questions."

The moment I said it. The moment the sentence left my tongue I knew I made a mistake. Her face went dark and I could feel her anger pulsing through the thick air. She yelled at me. Brave girl. I followed her lead and let my own anger out. My eyes went fiery, daring her to continue. She took the invitation bitterly, poking at the most sensitive subject she could. The Hanyou.

Her voice went a little softer when she asked me. Her expression lost some of its hate and her eyes went sad, lost in memories I couldn't see. But I could still see her blame. "If you really cared for him, why would you leave him alone in a dangerous forest, knowing that people and demons alike… Dislike half demons?"

I flinched inwardly at the question; at the accusations she made at me. I tried to defend my actions by first pushing her away. I tried to ignore the memories that surfaced of the day. Then I changed the subject; I changed it to her and off of me, trying to draw her attention away. _'I am supposed to ask the questions._ '

She was different; she was so different from any other human. "You are not from here. You, do not belong here. If you were, you would have known better than to touch a son of the West. Where are you from?"

She sat down, her face dropping. She was distressed, and it was overly evident in her answers. I didn't want to push the topic any harder on her. I didn't want her to feel this way. Something about her distress; it made me, unhappy. I had never felt that was about anyone before. But, her happiness was for some reason important to me. Just about as much as Inuyasha's. So, I decided to face my own inner demon, and admit what happened today. I don't know why I felt the need to explain my actions, but I did. I just let the memories flood back. And I told her my story.

"I didn't leave him unattended. I was called away… I was summoned. He couldn't come with me. Not this time."

I looked at her, and she waited for me to continue. I let the sorrow come back. "Inuyasha is an orphan."

I looked at him, sleeping silently in my arms. "My father and his mother were…" I let the sentence stray off as I caught the scent of her tears. I snapped my head up, looking into her soft eyes.

"Miko?"

She sniffed, waving her hand at me and wiping her cheeks, "No continue."

I nodded slowly, "I will spare you the details, but his mother was killed today, and our father died from injuries he sustained while in battle. Inuyasha does not know… Not yet." I was sparse with the specifics, not wanting to upset her further. No one needed to know the details, but I'm sure they would. My father's cohort Myoga was very loud mouthed for being so small. The world would know about father's death before his own son.

I saw the tears fall from her face, staining her clothing with their salty drops. I wanted for nothing more than to wipe them away and console her, to embrace her. But, I refused to move towards her. She would run, she would leave. I know she would. We are still from two different worlds, no matter how close we seem to be.

"See, young Miko. I did not leave him behind because I wanted to. I left him behind because I had to. I was too late to save his mother, and I was too late to help our father. I just didn't get the news in time."

I frowned and looked at the ground, my clawed nails digging deeply into the palm of my clenched fist. I closed my eyes tightly, aware that as the eldest son, I was now left the take my father's position, Lord of the West. I am not ready. There is so much I needed to ask and to learn.

' _I'm sorry father.'_

I felt her sit beside me as she brushed her hip against mine. I was startled that I didn't sense her stalk closer. She sat close to me, wrapping her arms around her knees. "I'm sorry Sesshomaru. I really am."

I couldn't look at her. Not in the eye. She spoke so familiar with me, as though we were old friends. It was unnatural; the way she broke to boundary between the demons and humans. But I wanted more.

"Sesshomaru, look at me." Her voice was so soft, a whisper in the empty forest. "It's not your fault. It's not anyone's fault."

"Miko…" I looked at her, her head tilted up slightly to look me in the eye; so close to mine.

"Kagome."

"Hn?"

"My name is Kagome."

I tasted the name on my tongue; how fitting it was. "Kagome… Thank you."

I wrapped my arm around her shoulders, not really thinking about the action. She leaned on me, closing her eyes and sinking deeper into my side. I looked into the dying fire, my head spinning. Her scent was so enticing, so close to me. I looked at her as her breathing slowed and she fell into her sleep.

Perhaps it was just her pity that made her stay; perhaps it was fatigue and want for warmth that drove her to me. Either way, I was glad she was here. I was relieved to hold her, and I was afraid to let her go.


	11. part 11

Part 11;

 **Disclaimer; I own nothing but the plot eh.**

XxXx **X** xXxX

The morning was chilly, though far more comfortable than my first night spent under the tree. I was warm this time, I had a soft body to sleep on and I was safe. I had someone; I was sound. I looked around, not wanting to leave the comfort of Sesshomaru's arms, but also apprehensive of why I even went to him. He had wrapped his fluff around me, the soft fur silky against my skin. I laid quietly, letting last night's conversation run through my mind like an old home movie. Start to finish, and from end to beginning.

' _He is not the man I knew. He has passion when he speaks and soul when he thinks. He is not the monster I met with Inuyasha the first time. He is not a monster at all. He is just a young lost kid now, different than Inuyasha, but so similar.'_

I sighed, ' _He looked at me so sadly when he told me their family died. Is this where their paths fork and they go their separate ways? Was Sesshomaru's loss so detrimental, that he cut off his own feelings?'_

My thoughts were cut short when he stirred, shifting me slightly. I felt him take a deep breath, his chest pushing up and back in. His chest started to vibrate, a low hum sounding almost inaudibly.

His arm had slipped down my shoulders and rested on my waist, hugging me closer to him. My own arm had traveled through the night, snaking out away from my own body and onto his, gripping his kimono lightly. I peeked up into his face as he started to hum louder, catching his golden eyes looking down at me. They flashed before looking away quickly; the humming slowing right down. I smiled at him, halfway between happy and nervous. I had, after all, just spent the night in Sesshomaru's arms; the man that I know to absolutely hate humans.

XxXx **X** xXxX

I couldn't help myself. I had slept lightly that night, every sound she made and every time she moved had rocked me out of my shallow slumber. I had become aware of her wakefulness, and couldn't help but watch her. She huddled tighter, her calm breathing evident of her newfound comfort with me.

I shifted in my own spot, unable to contain it anymore. I started to hum, a happy tune emanating deep from within my chest. It grew louder the longer I looked down at her. ' _Why do I feel this way? Why? What is this? Father. I have so many questions. They will never be answered.'_

I was lost in thought when she looked at me. My eyes flashed before I looked away quickly, embarrassed. I stopped humming as she smiled at me, smirking right back. "Morning Kagome."

She blushed, though I was unsure as to why. "M..Morning."

I took my arm back as she sat up, watching her stretch. "Where's Inuyasha?" She looked around expectantly.

I hate to admit, but her initial concern for my half-brother, I felt something. Jealousy maybe? Jealous over the fact that he was her first thought. "He is off playing. Would you like to help me find him?"

She smiled deeply, her eyes sparkling. "I would love to."

XxX

She followed, lagging a few steps behind me. I weaved expertly through the trees, scents and sounds echoing in the forest. I knew exactly where Inuyasha was; his scent drifting lazily with the wind. He rummaged through the trees chasing something. I led Kagome parallel to him, taking her to the river. He would be along soon enough; he loved the river, and I wanted to talk more. I wanted to know her. _'But how do I do that?'_

I parted the trees, allowing her to duck past me and into the clearing. The water was clean and clear, gurgling through the rocks and past the banks. The sun sparkled the river of diamonds and she smiled broadly.

"Come on Sesshomaru!"

She jogged to the water, kicking off her odd shoes. I only watched her as she waded up to her ankles. She bent over slightly, catching her hair in her hand and pushing it back. "Oh look at the minnows!"

Her hand followed the fish, tracing their paths from the sky. I watched her, fascinated. ' _This creature really is interesting, isn't she? So different…So pure…So young and compassionate. Yet, so full of fire.'_

She looked at me, laughing; "Come in!"

I smirked. She was having fun with me. This behaviour. Is this how humans exhibit trust?

"In the water?"

She grabbed her hips with her hands, "yes in the water. It's so nice!"

I slowly made my way over to a boulder as she wadded deeper, her skirt just dangling above the water's surface. She smiled as she looked at me and splashed, "Why are you staring at me?"

I felt my face redden, hopefully not enough to be noticeable. "I can I help it if I find you to be so beautiful."

She blushed, "Well thanks."

I smiled, nodding my head. I turned to the trees, noticing how Inuyasha's scent mingled with that of another demon. An alarm went off in my head; he needed me.

"Kagome. We must go, now!"

She looked at me stunned, her face losing all its joy. She exited the water and I scooped her up just as quick. I had her shoes in one arm and her in the other, racing through the trees. I could hear her heart pounding in her chest, unsure if it was because I frightened her, or because she was worried.

"What is it Sesshomaru?" Her voice was steady; calm and collected.

"Inuyasha."

 **I am really enjoying writing both what Kagome and Sesshomaru are thinking/ doing in these scenes; I might start posting two chapters at a time to help catch up to the plot because both their thoughts had taken up so much space right.., I have also decided to reduce the frequency of Kagome's monologues and actions that repeat scenes since we all know Kagome real well anyway and its unnecessary. I will however introduce her mind in when it's necessary. It's Sesshomaru I'm tweaking here so... I'm just having fun with it now. See what happens.**

 **Thanks to my Guest reviewer that opened my eyes to the bad habit I was getting into.**

 **And thanks to all my other reviewers and story followers that continue to read what I type, even if it does annoy them a bit at times.**


	12. part 12

Part 12;

xXxX **x** XxXx

I sat on the ground, slipping my shoes back onto my now dried feet as he walked off into the clearing. I jumped up and tried to follow him, confident. He turned and grabbed my shoulders lightly, pushing me back into the bush and hiding me.

He looked at me seriously, his eyes pleading, "Please stay here Kagome."

I looked down, nodding.

Sesshomaru turned away and marched up to the demons, standing behind the two large creatures, his composure steady. The demons stood over a cliff, cat calling to the small Hanyou that hid below.

I watched him flex his hand, his claws dripping with a green poison. He growled, leaping without a sound and clean slicing the first demon from shoulder to hip, the green venom seeping into its flesh. Stunned, it fell to his knee with a scream, stabbing his half sword into the dirt with a loud clunking sound. Blood poured from the ox demons wound, puddling thickly around his legs and knees.

The ox demon's ally turned, his agility much higher than his pig demon body alluded to. He snorted, his voice muffled with his thick accents. "Demon, why have you interrupted our snack." He spoke between smacks, his jaws salivating heavily. "This half demon is ours, not yours."

He lifted up a mace with his thick arms, bringing it down on Sesshomaru. He missed, only sending sprays of soil into the clear sky. Sesshomaru hovered above the demon, inflicting as much fear as he could before falling down upon him with his claws. The demon fell to his knees, clutching his wounded neck. He tried to yell in pain, only succeeding in gargling his words. "Who are you to protect a half breed?"

"Sesshomaru. Lord of the West." He answered with a hint of pain in his voice.

The demons eyes widened in an unrecognizing rage before he fell to his side.

I started to run out to Sesshomaru, leaving the cover of the trees behind. A smooth, poisonous voice stopped me, sending chills deep into my spine. "Your friend is a pain. But, full demons do taste better than half demonssss. I'll get rid of you human, then enjoy the spoils."

I turned quickly, spinning so fast I nearly fell. I was face to face with a large demon, slithering and sliming in the trees, coming towards me. The large snake lunged at me from out of the trees, his mouth wide and fangs hanging low. I screamed as I thrust my hands up into the air in a weak attempt to shield my body, letting my powers escape in one burst. The snake demon froze in place, its skin melting off its bones and its final scream echoing through the trees, a scream that would haunt even the most hardened of demons. It disintegrated into nothing as I fell to my knees, shaking. _'I… I never used that much power before.'_

I caught my breath as my tremors subsided, standing up on my jelly legs.

"Oh! Sesshomaru! Inuyasha!" My mind clicked, reminding me of the others.

I had tunnel vision as I ran to the cliff, looking for my Inuyasha. My young friend. "Inuyasha! You're okay!"

He was curled into a ball on a ledge, his little golden eyes looking up at me through his tears. I offered him my hand to which he took quickly. I hauled him up, giving him a quick hug and squeeze. I looked back at the battlefield with a smile. "Sesshomaru, he's okay."

Sesshomaru laid on the ground, his fine hair and kimono soiled by the blood and dirt. He didn't stir when I called his name.

"Sesshomaru?"

I set Inuyasha down and ran to him, brushing some of the filth from his royal cheeks. "Sesshomaru! Please, say something."

He cracked his eyes open at me, their luster and light gone. "Kagome?"

That was all he said as he closed his eyes again, leaning his head back.

"Sesshomaru!"

XxXx **X** xXxX

The demons were pathetic. I didn't even have to use my superhuman senses to know it. I could see their weakness, and their deaths were unexciting, a tedious task at most. They died with little effort; I didn't even break a sweat.

I turned toward Inuyasha; to the cliff. A scream hit me before I could even take one step. ' _Kagome.'_

I turned to her, to help, but was sent flying. I landed hard on my back, my breath leaving my lungs with a punch. I burned. My whole body burned and fought for its right to exist. My skin felt like it was melting, peeling and burning away like paper in a fire. My lungs couldn't find their breath and I gasped like a fish left on a dry beach. The pain was excruciating, unlike anything I had ever felt. I was fading away. But.

I heard her. I heard her calling me. My name was spoken with such concern and fear. I looked up at her with my burning eyes, her face dropping and her eyes watering. Inuyasha stood beside her, looking down with confusion. _'Hmm. He's too young to understand what's happening. He's too young to understand death. Fear, yes. But not death.'_

I closed my eyes and leaned back, well aware of Kagome's soft hands on my body, working hard to reverse whatever it was that happened to me. I could hear her frustrated voice and I could smell her tears.

"No, no, no, Sesshomaru no. I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you." She mumbled through clenched teeth, "I didn't mean to use my powers on you."

I reached my arm up and wiped away her tears before I retreated deep within myself, escaping the pain. I let my demonic powers free; free to reclaim my partially purified body, to try to reverse Kagome's attack.

Darkness. All I saw was the darkness.


	13. part 13

Part 13;

I woke with a start, my eyes flashing red and my fangs elongated. My heart pounded in my chest as I hissed at no one in particular. My demon side was running ramped inside me, tearing and ripping through my body. I gritted my teeth as I willed the beast back down inside, reclaiming my dominancy over the animal. It complied with my wishes, though fought and howled at my command after being free so long and became dormant in my heart once again. Once my vision cleared I looked at my surroundings. I was no longer on the cliff. I sat at the base of a tree, long grasses climbing up over my legs, almost as though they tried to swallow me. I swished them away, irritated. "Get off me."

I could not recall how I made it here, and could not remember much of what had happened. Inuyasha, I assumed, was no longer in peril, and for that I was grateful, but neither was Kagome or him near to me. I couldn't see her, I couldn't hear him, and I couldn't smell her sweet scent; not even trace amounts. _'Kagome?_ '

I laid on the ground, not moving, not stirring. I held my eyes closed, smelling the world around me for miles. _'I almost died. She could have killed me, yet I still want her here.'_

I sighed. ' _He's always gone when I need him the most. Father, he would know what I'm doing here. I seem to have fallen in this humans trap._ '

XxX

I walked through the trees, covering the slight limp that developed in my leg. I growled, fully aware of how vulnerable I had become, all on account of one girl. A human girl nonetheless. ' _How could she injure me? Heh, injure me, she practically killed me. And here I am calling her a weak human.'_

I slowed up, Kagome and Inuyasha's scents becoming strong and distinct. "Kagome."

I walked a bit faster, forgetting the pain in my leg as their presence became clearer. Trampled grasses and broken sticks, soft sweet voices and whispered lullabies. They were here.

I broke through the trees, a large smile on my face. After all, I was here, I was alive, and so was everyone else. I tried to speak, her name on the tip of my tongue.

Her face when she saw me dropped, her tender smile fading. I felt panicked as she screamed, and Inuyasha cried.

XxXx **X** xXxX

I laughed at Inuyasha, his running and tumbling through the grass and around the trees. I was exhausted, my arms tired and my energy expelled, but I smiled for him, and I laughed for him.

We had wandered the forest all night, propelled by fear. He could have been right behind us, or he could have been waiting right around the next tree or rock. But it didn't matter, we just had to keep going. To keep moving. Inuyasha had held my hand, keeping me moving with promises of keeping me safe. I followed his promises, and now it was my turn to protect him.

Inuyasha's energy was endless, something I knew very well after traveling with him looking for the jewel shards. Even as a child, he didn't stop. Running in circles around me, jumping and racing. He was someone to be envied he was.

I finally had enough, I couldn't keep going. "Inuyasha, come here a minute. Let's take a break."

"Awe, but I'm not tired. Can't we keep going this way?"

I fell to the ground, the barrier I had managed to erect around us falling faster than I. ' _Damn, now he can find us, but I can't keep it up_.'

My smile faltered before I stated to glow again, urging him to sit with me.

"What's wrong Ka-o-may?" He stopped playing, his face becoming more serious than a child's should.

' _Where do I start? I can't keep going and I know he's going to find us._ ' I grabbed him, tickling his stomach as I pulled him onto my lap. "Nothing you, how's about a quick story? Have you ever heard the one of the Tongue Cut Sparrow?"

He giggled, "No, Sess doesn't tell me stories." He leaned back comfortably.

I flinched at the name but still I smiled. This was one of my favourites, and I could remember my Father telling it to me when I was about Inuyasha's age. For being so young, the words stuck deep inside my head, rooted there like the sacred Tree of Ages. "Okay. Here goes."

"Once upon a time there lived an old man and an old woman. The old man, who had a kind heart, kept a young sparrow, which he tenderly nurtured. But the dame was a cross-grained old thing; and one day, when the sparrow had pecked at some paste with which she was going to starch her linen, she flew into a great rage, and cut the sparrow's tongue and let it loose.

When the old man came home from the hills and found that the bird had flown, he asked what had become of it; so the old woman answered that she had cut its tongue and let it go, because it had stolen her starching-paste. Now the old man, hearing this cruel tale, was sorely grieved, and thought to himself: "Alas! Where can my bird be gone? Poor thing! Poor little tongue-cut sparrow! Where is your home now?" and he wandered far and wide, seeking for his pet, and crying: "Mr. Sparrow! Mr. Sparrow! Where are you living?"

One day, at the foot of a certain mountain, the old man fell in with the lost bird; and when they had congratulated one another on their mutual safety, the sparrow led the old man to his home, and, having introduced him to his wife and chicks, set before him all sorts of dainties, and entertained him hospitably.

"Please partake of our humble fare," said the sparrow. Poor as it is, you are very welcome."

"What a polite sparrow!" answered the old man, who remained for a long time as the sparrow's guest, and was daily feasted right royally. At last the old man said that he must take his leave and return home; and the bird, offering him two wicker baskets, begged him to carry them with him as a parting present. One of the baskets was heavy, and the other was light; so the old man, saying that as he was feeble and stricken in years he would only accept the light one, shouldered it, and trudged off home, leaving the sparrow family disconsolate at parting from him.

When the old man got home, the dame grew very angry, and began to scold him saying: "Well, and pray where have you been this many a day? A pretty thing, indeed, to be gadding about at your time of life!"

"Oh!" replied he, "I have been on a visit to the sparrows; and when I came away, they gave me this wicker basket as a parting gift." Then they opened the basket to see what was inside, and, lo and behold, it was full of gold and silver and precious things. When the old woman, who was as greedy as she was cross, saw all the riches displayed before her, she changed her scolding strain, and could not contain herself for joy.

"I'll go and call upon the sparrows, too," said she, "and get a pretty present." So she asked the old man the way to the sparrows' house, and set forth on her journey.

Following his direction, she at last met the tongue-cut sparrow, and exclaimed: "Well met! Well met, Mr. Sparrow! I have been looking forward to the pleasure of seeing you." So she tried to flatter and cajole the sparrow by soft speeches.

The bird could not but invite the dame to its home; but it took no pains to feast her, and said nothing about a parting gift. She, however, was not to be put off; so she asked for something to carry away with her in remembrance of her visit. The sparrow accordingly produced two baskets, as before, and the greedy old woman, choosing the heavier of the two, carried it off with her. But when she opened the basket to see what was inside, all sorts of hobgoblins and elves sprang out of it, and began to torment her.

The old man without wife and neighbour adopted a son to company him in his aging years, and his family grew rich and prosperous. What a happy old man, to have met that pleasant young sparrow."

I looked down at Inuyasha, his face all scrunched up in thought. "I liked that story. Tell another?"

I smirked, "Not this time. I think it's time to get moving again." ' _We don't want him to catch up.'_

I felt Inuyasha tense up, and I turned quickly. We were too late. He stood there, a smile on his face and his arms open.

I paled, "We wasted too much time." I closed my eyes, horrible memories and black and white images flashing in my mind.

Inuyasha started to cry, his voice cracking and panicking. I just screamed. I couldn't even stand to run. Couldn't even console Inuyasha. Just, scream.

 **Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

 **Sorry for the long authors note but:::**

 **I do not own the tongue cut sparrow story, I borrowed it from** **Source: A. B. Mitford,** _ **Tales of Old Japan**_ **, vol. 1 (London: Macmillan and Company, 1871), pp. 249-50.** **Off the internet.**

 **I believe I sited my source properly for this and will not be accused of plagiarism or taking credit for someone else's work, also I hope the story within my story was enjoyed. I just really liked it and wanted to include it in this chapter. Check out the other stories on there too, they are interesting.**

 **Sorry if I put more fluff than normal into this one. Some may be thinking, what's the point of the sparrow story, or why so many details and ring arounds. Well, I just like details and a lot of elements in a story. I'm just trying to make it something I can be happy with, and when too many big things happen like bam, bam, bam, bam, etc., it doesn't feel real to me. There are a lot of moments that would be glossed over if I just stuck to my main points. I want to experience these characters lives, and I feel I'm doing that by describing their every moment And I think it helps set me up for later. I don't bottle neck my story so I get stuck later on, I leave it open for any new Ideas I have.**

 **And with that, I really hope this chapter was enjoyed and sparked more interest. If it didn't or it turned off some readers, that's okay too. I can't impress everyone.**


	14. part 14

_**Note ~ is a flash back symbol. Thx.**_

Part 14;

He looked at me with panic in his eyes, fear even as my high scream turned into an angry roar. He seemed confused, but, I didn't care. I really didn't care what he felt. It was, as far as I could tell, all over. There was no more running. He found us, and we are defenceless, and I will finally protect Inuyasha. I will be the hero of this story.

XxX

~ I cried over his body; his burned, peeling body. The soft cloth of his Kimono caught my tears, drinking them greedily. His armour still gleamed, reflecting my fair skinned face. He had retreated within himself, no longer answering my or Inuyasha's calls. I tried to shake him awake. I jarred him, attempting to shock him, stopping when his irritated skin started to bleed and pucker, the worst wounds I had ever seen him, or anyone receive.

'I did this? It's horrific.'

I looked away both disgusted with myself and what I saw, his tired and laboured breathing the only hint that he was still even alive. I undid his kimono carefully and slid the many layers to the side, slowly revealing his chest. The muscle, once thick and toned, was now severely destroyed. Abrasions and lacerations cut deeply across his fine skin, red and irritated. I brushed my fingertips over the wounds, imagining how he would have been. How he was before. He flinched at my touch, his hand grabbing mine with lightning speed. I jumped, a small squeak escaping my lips. His eyes shot open, focused on me. Everything that was Sesshomaru was gone; the small, barely visible twinkle in his eyes; the deep pools of secrets I had started to dive into. He looked at me with his red eyes, with his demon eyes. My heart went cold as he snarled, his fangs exposed. He griped my forearm harder. ~

XxX

"Kagome?" He stepped towards us, but I screamed again, louder and more threatening, like a mother protecting a child would.

"Stay back! Stay back." I held my hand out as though that would keep him at bay while I took the moment to stand tall. I could feel my faint powers surging through my extended hand and out into my fingertips, adrenaline giving me the energy I required.

My anger started to muffle the fear I had once felt as I mindlessly held my ribs, my hand flat on the bruises and scrapes hidden beneath my blood stained uniform. ' _How dare he? How dare he attack and mutilate, then come here expecting forgiveness. He will not hurt him. He will not hurt us, again.'_

His face went blank as mine darkened, blank like still water; like a fresh snow. His arms fell as he looked away. I took the opportunity to push Inuyasha towards the bushes. He reluctantly and soundlessly stepped away, his tears falling silently as he slipped away.

Sesshomaru frowned as he looked me from head to toe. He spoke in his monotone voice, only fueling my resentment. "Why?"

XxXx **X** xXxX

Her anger was out-of-place and misdirected; unbecoming of her. What did I do to deserve such treatment? Protect her and my kin? She roared and challenged me as I tried to step closer, something I could only accept. I will not deny a challenge. I wiped my face clear, one question burning like a hot iron in my mind. "Why?"

She seemed to get angrier, her face a bright shade of red and her shoulders shaking. It, honestly, would have been an amusing situation, had her powers not frighten me so. I reached out to her again, missing her arm as she pulled away. Her face was dark, but I could see through her. I could smell her fear and apprehension, but also her anger. ' _Why are you so afraid, young Miko? And, why do I care?_ '

I used my lightning quick reflexes to catch her arm, my grip tighter than I had meant it to be. I could see her eyes fill with pain, tears and hurt; hear her voice gasping as I bruised her cream skin. My stare turned to stone, my eyes going glossy. Memories of the night before flooded my head. That face. That is how she looked at me last night. That fear. That regret. The regret of not killing me when she could have.

~I had her in my grip, my fangs dripping with saliva and venomous poisons. She struggled, tears spilling down her cheeks and panic saturating her voice and her very scent. I roared from deep within my chest. A voice I had not heard in a very long while. My beast surged forward, taking over my consciousness and my body. And I let him. He hid me from the pain, he hid me from the light. Not as though I had a choice in the matter to begin with. Normally, his urges were revolting and strong, but in this state, his bloodlust was too much for me to handle, and a welcome change over the excruciating pain.

We licked our fangs, our eyes turning blood red and our hair standing on end. We were in a vortex only we could feel. Stage one of the takeover. He eyed the human, Kagome, hungrily. Our urges to kill and ravage rose rapidly. We laughed maniacally at her horror, screaming up into the sky as we fell on all fours like an animal. She kicked off the ground, running as fast as her human body let her. We followed quickly, excitement building up as the chase ensued. My robes flapped viciously as we ran, blood pumped in our ears, loud and exhilarating. We reached to slash at her, though a sharp pain on our side knocked us to the ground. We had missed her shoulder by inches, succeeding in only cutting the grass. We snarled at our attacker; Inuyasha. He crouched in fear before us, a pitiful scowl plastered across his small face as he submitted. We grimaced, flexing our claws. I fought a little harder, ' _No._ ' He spoke no words as he ignored my pleas and attacked my brother. Our brother. The only family we had left.

Kagome screamed to Inuyasha, snapping him out of his petrified and down turned state. He pushed off his knees and tried to dodge our attack, slipping on the upturned earth. We caught him across the cheek, our claws digging deeply into his warm flesh. He cried out in pain, but continued to run. A tough half demon indeed. He grabbed Kagomes waist, sagging against her as she raised her hands. Tiny slivers of energy shot out of her hands, piercing my body and knocking me to the ground. She picked Inuyasha up, cradling his wound with her hand as they disappeared into the trees. We fell flat on the ground, but stood quickly, attempting to regain our failing balance. We sniffed at the breeze with a foggy head, following them into the trees as best as we could. Damn Kagome and her mystery powers.

We saw it too late, falling to the ground hard. I do remember falling. My beast was confused, ignorant of the power of the energy barrier we had hit. He growled at the barrier, using my hands to feel for any weaknesses. He whined at the wall; he growled and howled and moaned, all scents and sounds silenced by the obstacle; no doubt it was Kagomes powers. We panted, rage building up. We roared, silencing the forest for miles. He roared in anger and frustration, unable to find her scent, while I roared in happiness, proud of their ability to escape. I fell back into dormancy as the beast continued to use my body, allowing myself to rest. They were out of danger, and I was tired. I will be back. And when I am, I will get Kagome. ~

I blinked rapidly, releasing her arm. I had tried to kill them, tried to kill her. Again.

She gasped, "Let go." Pained tears spilled out of her eyes and down her cheeks as my grip finally ceased. I noted the blood slowly staining her white shirt as she backed up, clutching her arm loosely. Her appearance finally struck a chord in me. Blood; Sunken black eyes. Her luster gone. Inuyasha's blood crusted to her body and clothes, painting her so many shades of hurt and misery. Appalling.

I said nothing. What could I say? It was clear from the moment we first met she did not trust me. Maybe she was right not to. And now. What about now? Was this feeling, an emotion? Shame. Is this what shame feels like? I looked down, my shoulders falling slightly in defeat. "Take care of Inuyasha."

I left without a thought or warning. I didn't look back, or even ahead. I just disappeared in a flash of warm light, nothing more than a golden orb floating into the sky to be with the stars. Maybe there, I could disappear.

XxXx **X** xXxX

 **Sorry. It's been… Well it's been a long, what, month? Since I last updated. It's been a long, frustrating time, and I just couldn't get the energy to sit down and write my story for you. I hope it will pick back up soon, but I was almost done this chapter so I thought I'd try to finish it. Hope it's okay.**


	15. part 15

Part 15;

I cried. I fell to the ground in a crumpled mess, tears and blood staining my scabbed skin. I pulled my knees to my chest, becoming as small as I possibly could in the loud forest. With tears falling silently, I closed my eyes, hoping to forget; to burn some memories. But I couldn't. I needed gasoline; my memories need gasoline.

I imagined better things; happier endings and even happier days. I remembered teasing my brother and helping my mother. I remembered stories with my grandfather and lunches with my friends. Sango. I remembered our talks and our laughs; our bath's in the springs. Miroku and Shippo, all our travels and the many days spent together. And Inuyasha… ' _Inuyasha?_ ' I opened my puffy eyes, the child nowhere in sight.

I reluctantly forced myself up and out of the pit I had fallen into. I had to find him.

X****X

I found him not too far off, his arms full of fish and water. His cheek was puffy and red where Sesshomaru had caught him. Infection. He seemed to not be bothered by the wound, but I was not surprised. He was a tough little one.

"Inuyasha."

"Kagome! You are up. I saw you laying on the ground and I thought you was hurted, so I got some water and food for you."

I smiled at him, "I'm alright, thank you. Let's get a fire going and get you cleaned up and fed shall we?"

"Yes!"

X**X

I plopped him down in front of me as I ripped a strip of cloth from my torn sleeve. I soaked it in the water I had heated over our dying fire, hoping to bring down some of his swelling. I pressed it lightly to his face as I relived the last few days. All I could see was the future I knew to be coming true. The life filled with hurt and pain. So much pain. ' _Inuyasha, how will you make it so far?'_ I stared through him as he sat there, his little face covered with my makeshift cloth as he fiddled with a small rope in his hands. I could only see how much agony Sesshomaru is going to cause him. How much he has already inflicted upon the pup. It breaks my heart.

I was snapped back to life as Inuyasha held his open palm to me. He held onto a small, blue pendant dangling from the thin string. "Mamma gave it to me. She said to hold onto it for her."

My heart jumped.

"I miss Mother. I wanna go home."

I gasped like a fish for a response. _'It's time.'_

I knelt on the ground in front of him as I swallowed the lump growing in my throat.

"Inuyasha," I grabbed his hands so he would look at me, "You can't go home. Your mother won't be there."

"What do you mean? Mother is gone? She gonna be back soon right? We been away from her a long time."

He stood in front of me hopeful and oblivious. I took a deep breath, closing my eyes. ' _This is not a time to break down.'_

"Inuyasha, understand that, I will take care of you now. Know that your mother loves you and will always watch over you, but you won't always be able to see her."

He started breathing heavily, eyes widening with every breath. "Wh…What do you mean?"

"Your mother… she is no longer with us. She died Inuyasha." I held him tighter. "Sesshomaru meant to tell you. He wanted to tell you; he should have told you. But…"

He bawled at me. "No! My mother is not dead. She loves me! She will come back for me because she loves me!"

He squirmed against me, but I only hugged him as tight as I could, not allowing him to escape my grip. He pushed and cried. He screamed, tears running down his face. I cried too, but remained silent and strong. He gave one final shove, breaking our bond as he ran off into the trees, blind as to where, and to whom he ran to.

' _I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry Inuyasha._ '

I chanted back and forth before chasing him into the trees, curbing my tears and pain, saving it for later. _'This is not a time to break down. This is not a time to break down. Please, don't breakdown.'_

"Inuyasha!"

X*****X

I looked up into the sky, my mind blank as my stare. My surroundings were quickly evaluated, known to be the place in which Kagome and I first 'met.' I took one last glance at the spot; the spot I where I had pinned her down. Images of what could have been flashed quickly through my mind. A gentle touch instead of my harsh actions; a passionate smile instead of my cold stare; A soft kiss instead of my death grip on her delicate neck.

I sighed softly. _'Alas, I digress. I'm supposed to be leaving them behind, not wallowing in past experience. I am not meant to have these kinds of bonds; just my loneliness. Father, what were you thinking in trusting a life to me?'_

I took a deep breath and composed myself. I stood tall, shoulders back and face forward, striding with purpose through the forest. I will not look back. I will not be hurt again; nor will I hurt her again.

X*****X


	16. part 16

Part 16;

The forest, full of life it was though alive it was not, only watched as a small hanyou ran through its' many thick and tangled branches. He cried and moaned, but he never slowed. He fell to the ground, his hands scraping and robe tearing. His bawling eventually reduced to small whimpers, and his tears replaced with a scowl. He sat on the ground, his feet brought beneath his body in a crouching manner. He sat still as a rock under my roof of trees as he looked through the many leaves to the sky. He remained unaware of the cobalt blue eyes that watched him curiously from the shadows.

X*****X

I ran through the trees calling for him. I had to mentally slap myself as I whistled, reminding myself that Inuyasha was not a lost puppy, but rather a person; a person who was, no doubt, older than I. I managed to repress a smile at the thought, fully aware of how the older Inuyasha I knew would react to being called like a dog.

His trail was sloppy at first, fallen branches crushed and broken and fresh leaves torn from their respective branches. The further I followed, the cleaner it got, his trail growing less and less obvious. I sighed heavily at the loss, standing silently next to a wide tree. ' _Damn Inuyasha. Where did you run off to?'_

I had to chastise myself for thinking about my problems again. _'Who am I kidding? I can't get that man... Eerr, demon out of my head. I have to get home, I have to get back to the world I knew. Or understood at least. What can I say though, I just want to see him again.'_

Images of Sesshomaru danced through my wandering mind. His softer shell, unhardened by time and tension. This is the kind of Sesshomaru Inuyasha needs. That Inuyasha craves. I have to find that boy. And I have to find Sesshomaru. _'I have to apologize. It wasn't your fault. It wasn't your fault Sesshomaru. You didn't have to leave. You shouldn't have left, and I shouldn't have let you'_

The sound of men dying and crows crying brought me back. The copper tang of spilled blood and the ringing of clan on clan. I fell harshly into the grass, slithering my way under a thin bush. It gave little to no protection, and less ease of mind. I peered both curiously and hesitantly from under the bush, spying the reason for the uproar.

Men cried and moaned as they laid dying in the clearing. The fight was completely one sided, an obvious advantage in both skill and man power. The stronger clan fought with little to no heart, not the slightest bit interested in the measly attempts of the lesser men. It was hard to watch.

The stronger clan consisted of over two dozen wolves, their garments and armor splattered with blood; not their own. Their leader stood back, barking his orders with a commanding yet oddly friendly tone. His eyes shone with a pleasure one only obtains in the midst of battle, in the wake of a victory.

His long, pulled back hair and clean polished armor. His pose and finer furs, everything about him screamed alpha. And everything about him screamed of familiarity. He looked a lot like someone I knew.

My daydream about the wolf was stopped short as a demon from the smaller, weaker clan spied me from his position on the ground. His shaggy fur hung off his thick arms and body in stimulating patterns. Layers of many colors, shiny and perfectly kept. He sat up and stood tall, like the many demons hiding in human forms do. I made the mistake of making eye contact, looking deeply into eyes that never ended. I was captivated, held in place by the beauty of the creature. His face was pristine, beckoning me closer with promises of safety and security. I could only oblige to his request, right? Before I could say no, I was standing and walking out of the brush, eyes still on the youkai several paces in front of me. I crossed the threshold quickly before I was face to face with the being. Alarms sounded in my head, but I could do nothing. The ending battle around me was forgotten as he reached for me. His once soft eyes took on an evil glow, black bleeding into the once soft blues. The last thing I heard, was the thump of blade on skin, and the last thing I felt was the spray of blood, thick and warm on my frozen and terrified skin. I fell to the ground, my breaths almost stopping altogether.

 **X***X**

 **Well. Now I'm just writing for the sake of writing, not gonna lie. I don't really have a plan for this story anymore. It sounded like a good idea when I started but I dunno... Oh well. I will just keep going because I can, and who wants an unfinished story on their mind anyway? It will just take me longer to write it. But I don't give up. I'm not going to run away and I don't go back in my word. That's my nindo, my ninja way. Haha, see what I did there? Naruto…. Ahhh, good show. Gooood show.**


	17. part 17

Part 17;

' _Am I dead? I have to be dead.'_ My body felt light and airy, hanging from the sky like a droopy cloud. A pestering buzz; a low hum sounded in my ears, echoing through the peaceful serenity. I frowned, swatting at the noise. It only grew louder, maturing into voices and different sensations. I moaned in my sleeplike state, snuggling deeper into the warm skins that made up my little nest.

With a sharp poke to my side, I was awoken from my dream. I mumbled incoherently, not even understanding myself as to what I had said. I slowly sat up straight as a shadowy figure retreated lazily. I watched them as I squinted to view my surroundings. Darkness. That's all I saw. ' _At least I'm not dead. Yet.'_

My senses regained function, and I could make out more and more detail about my environment. I could hear shuffling and whispers, the sources few in numbers. They were demons; I was not naive enough to believe otherwise. I could smell the cave, even with my simple human senses. Damp yet warm, sweet, yet stale. I closed my eyes briefly, crumpling the soft furs I currently sat upon in my small hands, trying to remember how I may have gotten here. The rainbow demons? The wolf demons? Yes, the wolf demons.

My eyes were slow to adjust, but the shapes and outlines were hard to mistake. I could see them standing at a distance, but could feel them staking closer; could feel their blood lust. I shivered, my priestess powers cracking sharply in my body, tapping impatiently against my bones for release. I suppressed it, calling out to the creatures.

"Hello? Who are you? What do you want?"

I shivered at the childish giggles I received, jumping at the soft pattering of feet leaving the small cave room. I sighed inwardly, standing tall on my shaky legs. I guess my fearful body doesn't agree with my brave front.

With every step I took forward, the demons took two steps back. I frowned, but kept moving, my curiosity getting the better of me.

The mouth of the cave led me closer to an exit, but not close enough. The rumbling of voices only grew louder as I walked a dark narrow path. The mystery demons seemed happy to lead me, but to where I was being led, felt oddly similar to a cow being led to slaughter.

I started to run as the winding corridor filled with a burst of fresh air, freedom. I skidded to a halt as I burst out of the tunnel, my shoes clacking sharply on the stone. I inhaled sharply as I became the center of attention. Countless pairs of eyes looked at me, some with disgust and some with a surprised shock. I smiled nervously, inching my way through all the demons.

I gave little waves here and there, whispering greetings.

"Stop, woman."

My heart jumped, but I reacted quickly. I ran. The other demons let me through, but I could feel the one behind me. The one who tried to stop me. I could see the mouth of the cave. I could smell the fresh air, and hear the birds. I could also hear voices. No, screams. Inuyasha.

X*****X

Quiet. It was exceptionally quiet, much like the days before I traveled with Inuyasha. I went through many questionable feelings as I ventured further and further. My declaration to leave them behind was slowly crumbling as the minutes ticked past. I was in charge of Inuyasha, entrusted with his life, and I dumped him off the first chance I got. I ran my hands through my hair, my anger slowly growing. I stopped abruptly and roared out into the sky. _'Hn. Look at me, Sesshomaru, reduced to such a state. You used to be so much better at hiding your emotions, hell, you used to not even feel. You were a real demon then, what about now?'_ I mentally berated myself as I turned around, stalking back to the place I left my brother, and that woman. I felt an eternal rage burning deep within my chest.

X***X

I stood against a tree, my hands pressed lightly to my temple. My anger had led me to a battle scene, a bunch of imps fighting a demon way out of their league. It was a massacre, but I had no interest in the quarrel. My position was neutral, only one thought escaping my head. "Move."

The demon growled and laughed, his voice deep and thick. I paid no heed to his words, clean slicing him through with a movement too fast to see before he could even finish. "Enough."

It was a snap decision, the quickest way through the clearing. My actions earned me praise and gratitude through the ranks of the imps, something that I had not felt in years. The little demon cheering the loudest, whom I learned was Jaken, then undertook my journey as his own. His path was wherever I was.

"Jaken."

His voice was grating, but helped fill the silence created by Inuyasha's absence.

"Sorry my lord, I just can't get over my gratitude to you." He squeaked and stuttered, falling silent.

I ignored him, my brashness not even phasing him as he stood by my side. I followed my nose, scents from a fresh battle mixing with traces of Inuyasha and Kagome. I was not phased. They were not stupid enough to wander into a war. Or were they? The trail I followed took an abrupt turn, and I knew exactly where it was heading.

I called to Jaken, my new travel partner, encouraging him to grab onto my fur. His eyes bulged as he clung to me, his tears dampening the fine fur. I flew through the trees. _'You better be ok… Inuyasha.'_

 _..._

 _.._

 _._

 **[Sorry. Taking a long time to write this story.]**


	18. Part 18

Part 18

The sun shone brightly, too brightly in fact. The rays attacked my eyes, blinding me to the world outside the cave as I zipped out, calling his name desperately.

"Inuyash-ahhhh!"

My call quickly turned to a scream as I stepped over the edge of the river bank that hugged the strategic entrance. I'm not going to say I didn't overreact as I fell, but it all happened so fast. My memory flashed back to the first time I was captured, the overhanging cliff Shippo escaped off of. I was sure this was it; that I was going to plummet to my death right here and right now.

I hit the ground seconds later, splashing water up my sides and over my back. I scraped my knees and palms on the many small river rocks, grunting at the impact. I pushed myself up sputtering and shivering, both from the cool water and adrenaline pumping through my body. I could hear Inuyasha and a few other voices, their speech broken by sobs of laughter. "She's funny, I'm glad we're going to keep her around!"

I stood quickly, the water running down my legs and thickening as it went from pink tinged to darker shades of red. The bloodied water swirled around my calves before disappearing down the mild stream. I stood there a little embarrassed but grew hot under the collar as I watched them roll in the grass with laughter. Their voices rang out hysterically, tears rolling down their chubby and young cheeks. This was not funny.

I heard the faint sound of amusement, the sound of someone forcing more air out of their nose than normal from behind me. I turned pink, forcing my eyelids tightly together. _'Why? Why always me?'_

I hung there, dejected, ignorant of the reason I was even running in the first place. But, I didn't cry. No, instead I turned heel fast as I could, landing solidly and squarely, the water helping me in my twist. I stared at the leader, suppressing my surprise at my graceful movement and stance. I just stared him down with a frown, a look of pure hatred and unwavering disgust. He only smirked, his mind moving in the same direction as another wolf I knew; Koga.

"You are my woman."

X***X

My frown dropped and my face contorted with confusion and repulsion. _'Your woman? Where have I heard that line before I wonder?'_ I resisted the urge to roll my eyes as I backed out of the river towards Inuyasha and the three boys he laughed with. I stumbled slightly as my torn knee throbbed with a deep ache, but I didn't stop.

As I neared, the little Mo hawked boy took a step back, quickly followed by his friend. Inuyasha's face was joyous and bright, a face I was glad to see back on him. I snaked my hand out to him, reaching for his small fingers. He took my hand hesitantly, squeezing slightly for support. I was grateful, more than he would ever know.

"Umm, sorry. But I think we best be going." I turned, only to be grabbed from behind by a pair of small arms; the ponytailed boy. He gripped my legs tight, preventing me from moving as the leader, Koza, jumped off the cliff, landing smoothly beside me. "What's your hurry young maiden? Have somewhere better to be?"

My face reddened at the term maiden. I stuttered, earning myself a flirtatious grin. "Good. You will stay here with your… pup. And with ours." He eyed Inuyasha with a wary look, aware of his half human side lurking deep within. He then dismissed the pup clinging to my legs with a command I could not see, though that was the least of my worries at this point.

' _My pup? Mine? Inuyasha is not mine!'_ I looked down at him but he hadn't seemed to notice. He just stood there making faces at his new friends, at the three wolves I recognized and knew all too well. Koga, Ginta, Hakkaku.

They were so small, but what did I expect? That because they were full demon they were never children? Never so care free? Koga was different now. Of course he was. He was not an alpha like when I knew him. He was a beta, he was just another piece of the puzzle here. He smiled and grinned, flashing his teeth everywhere, and for once, I was not the target of his attentions.

I held Inuyasha's hand, but he still reached out trying to play with the boys who tumbled through the grass. My hands went slick as he squirmed away from me, romping and tromping through the trees with the other boys.

I half growled half groaned as he slid away, hissing at him to get back. I took one step, one simple step before I stiffened at his touch. Koza grabbed my arm pulling me back. He pressed himself against me, his face terribly close to mine. I turned to the side, but he had me trapped. I looked at him, the only thing I could do. His body language was aggressive, but his eyes spoke of different things. They were not demanding as he was coming on to be, but they held a certain hardness to them, one I only assume comes from thousands of years of life taking its toll.

He opened his mouth to speak, but was silenced by the marching of little feet, and by the presence of a lord. The lord of the west.

Koza's smile dropped and my hope flared.

X*****X

I dropped him onto the grass, his green scaly skin sheet white as he fell to his side, crumpling into the ground. His hands were still formed to my fur, holding onto the air like it was his life. Imps aren't meant to fly.

"Jaken, get up."

His abnormally high and squeaky voice did not rise, nor did he jump at my irritated command. I sighed, picking him up and carrying him like a package. _'I could have left him behind. Why didn't I just leave him behind?'_

I wiped my face clean of emotion as I neared the cave; as I closed in on my prey. Smells, sounds, voices; they were all new, different. Even Kagome's scent was warped here. It turned into something that was not familiar, that was not my own.

I rumbled at the young silver haired boy that followed me, his head low. The others were of no importance, but they followed along all the same. I swept the brush and grass aside with my free hand, dropping Jaken to the dirt. He grunted on impact yet didn't linger in the grass. He was frantic to keep up as we all filed past him.

My eyes were ablaze as I laid eyes on the couple, my face stoic. I presented myself with a great importance, as I was of course. I spoke no words as I entered the clearing, Inuyasha and three wolves in tow. My mere presence silenced the wolf as Kagome looked at me with hopeful eyes. She tried to speak; to wiggle out of the strange wolves' arms but he had none of it. The words caught in her throat as he hushed her, stepping towards me with arms held up protectively. Her forced silence was just as well. I was in no mood, and the predicament in which she had herself only accented that mood that much more.

"Hold it mutt. What do you think you are doing with my girl's child?" He snarled at me, his three pups at his side in an instant.

I stopped, my jaw gritting and my sword hand clenching. _'Mutt? Her child?'_

Jaken started to screech as I glared at Kagome, my face cross. She smiled dimly, baring her teeth in a weak smile.

"Who are you to call Lord Sesshomaru a mutt!? There is no creature of more pure blood than my Lord! He should tear your head off your body for that insolence!"

Several other wolves materialized, growling at him, "Don't you dare talk to our leader Koza that way! Who do you think **you** are?"

I dropped my foot on Jaken, hushing him as I stepped down hard.

Koza spoke again, his stance widening. "Leave my woman and her child alone, and you may go away in one piece." His smile was flashy, cocky at best.

I sighed as I eyed both him and his minions. How monotonous, but, play time is over.

X*****X

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

 _ **Soo, I thought I'd try to continue writing… See if I can redeem myself with any of this. I don't think so, so I apologize now for this. I want to write, I do. But, I feel like everything I type is just crap. Like, it should be typed right into a trash can. It's the best I can do, honest, I'm trying.**_

 _ **Oh, and I even made a plan on what direction to head in in order to have it make sense and to cap this thing off soo, look at me go A-ha.  
Anyway, yes, I also got lazy on Koga's fathers name. It was actually created when I made a typo on Koga's name. So I started putting random letters in place and voila! Koza was born. Aahhhrrugh. How uncreative. Sorry not sorry A-ha. No, I'm actually sorry.  
I also just noticed… I forgot to add A-un. He should have been in the story long before Inuyasha and Kagome and Jaken. And even then Jaken was a whim. Of course we will just pretend that A-un is away on business. Dragon, Yokai beast of burden business. Sad. I like A-un. Too bad he couldn't join the gang. But, he would be a pointless character. (Sorry for the long note. I ramble.)**_


	19. part 19

Part 19

~His white robes shone with a brilliance I had no words to describe. His face was radiant, a small smile gracing his otherwise perfect lips. The sun seemed to illuminate the world with a brighter than normal light, highlighting his features to an abnormal degree. Sesshomaru unsheathed his sword, beckoning to me as he challenged my captors. With a grace that was not my own I all but flew to him, becoming wrapped in his arms as birds chirped their graces. He laughed, a sound like rushing water as the enemy curled into a ball, cowering before us…~

I was jerked out of my daydream by Koza. He gave me a shake, his eyes wide and concerned. "Young maiden? Miko? Are you alright? I will not let this creature take you away. I will protect you with my life."

I seemed to shrink at his declaration. _'Protect me? You won't be protecting me, but you will lose your life if you don't let me go.'_

"Koza really, just let him take us please, keep your tribe safe."

He left me in the care of several of his pack mates as he walked away. "You are a part of my tribe now. Do not worry. I will come back for you."

I supressed a scream as I settled for an edgy growl. I looked out at Sesshomaru, noting how his otherwise blank face still held some emotion. He was not completely void, though I could not discern what he was feeling. I caught his eye, mouthing a sorry as he held my gaze. He made no face.

Koza raised his arms, blocking Sesshomaru from me, snarling as he did. The lord stopped and I could see his jaw clench as the wolf pups separated from him, taking refuge beside their alpha. Jaken started screeching, his personality and appearance not at all different from what I knew of him.

They closed in on each other and I was pulled back as weapons were drawn. I was dragged away as threats were thrown. I was protected from harm as metal met metal. And I was hurled to the side as something flew out of the brush, burying itself deep into my guard's chest.

X*****X

Koza was a strong demon, though I am stronger. His attacks were mediocre, leaving me to wonder how it was he became leader.

"You are strong, I will give you that." He grimaced as he blocked a particularly heavy blow of mine. I smiled inwardly. "I guess it's time to get serious." He smirked as he vanished.

I growled as I lifted my sword up, raised and ready. His attack was out of nowhere, speed and cunning battle tactics his only advantage. His hit was clean and smooth and I was sent flying as he swooped in for another blow, leaving me sprawled in the dust. My eyes bled red, but I suppressed the beast. I will win this fight. I do not need help from my primal state. I stood quickly, my nose sharpening. I released my poison whip, twirling it around my body faster and faster.

Speed, once Koza's ally, was now his enemy. He was moving too quickly to stop, unable to evade the green toxin. I caught him across the back as his dodge failed, leaving him pained in the dirt. I stepped on his shoulder as I sheathed my otherwise useless sword. He groaned as I flexed my fingers, my claws dripping with natural poison. "Die."

Instinctively, I jumped back, leaving my prey on the ground. The move was involuntary as I praised my primal senses for reacting. I had narrowly dodged the projectile as I surveyed my surroundings looking for a source. _'How did I miss them, that unique scent?'_

I growled as Kagome cussed, though was oddly relieved when I heard her still breathing. _'_ _But why? I am displeased with her, yet still care._ ' I growled. _'_ _Damn this feeling.'_

"Kagome." I was interrupted by another projectile which I blocked with my whip, slicing it clean in two. She ran to me, ignored by the comrades of the deceased wolf. "Sesshomaru, what's happening?"

I ignored her question, sensing the answer was about to make an appearance. Through the trees came more demons than one could count. Their limbs were gangly, yet their movements were graceful. Their bodies were slender, but their strength was not to be underestimated. They were covered in a thick layer of fur, their colour more brilliant than the rainbows after a strong storm. I heard Kagome whisper, her voice difficult for even me to pick up on. "They're back."

X***X

It was an odd predicament, though the situations I seem to find myself in recently are just that. Odd. My fight was interrupted and enemies became temporary allies, at least that's what I was told. Kagome was firm on her beliefs, firm on our responsibility to help, seeing as how I wounded Koza so. That is not to say that I follow orders like some mongrel pup, no. I fight, because said demons desire a fight. They stand between me and our way out.

My senses were tingling, smells becoming more blended and indiscernible. Bodies meshed together, where one enemy began is where another ended. Their fur was trickery, seeming to flow around their bodies like falling water. Their eyes pierced the weak of heart, turning said victims actions around on themselves or on comrades. I was immune to such deceptions and though the wolves were of weaker flesh, we still held the upper hand.

Irritated, I looked around, trying to find my kid brother and allies, Jaken and Kagome. She stood tall in a firing line, her bow held with equal strength of the wolves. Aim, shoot, reload repeat. I could see her lips moving in repetition to her chant, her powers enveloping the arrows and purifying demons with each shot. They received the quickest death of all. I spotted Inuyasha and Jaken next, their quivering shapes with the other pups, like they were their own. It mystified me, the wolves actions towards my company that was, but at least they were both safe.

I turned my attention back to the demons, noting how their eyes changed colour like their fur. Red, Blue, Black. It was like a pattern, changing consistently, never missing a beat. I sliced one through with my claws, his scream ringing my ears. I flicked the filth from my nails as I continued to sift through the masses, the leader my target.

He, or should I say she, was not hard to find, as she sought me out. Her skin was light in colour while her hair flowed in long tresses. Like her demon spawn, it was like fire flickering in many different hues. Her clothes were just large enough to cover her modesty and her eyes were a bright blue. Stage two of the change.

"Your eyes do not affect me. You'll receive no mercy from me." I took a stand, my sword left comfortably against my hip.

She smiled, her finely tapered teeth rubbing dangerously against her lip as she attacked. I was slow, my edge lost. She grazed my precious locks, several white strands falling to the ground in a beautiful mess. I flipped, using my own speed to slip behind her. I sliced at her with my poison claws, penetrating the ground with the toxins.

She laughed, her voice airy as she drew two swords. She twirled around me, my steps leading her in a deadly dance as I dodged each swing. Her movements never tired and her blows never softened. I was on the defensive, unable to counter her. She feigned a swing, pushing me right when I should have went left. Her sword came down on me and I felt the blood spatter.

I looked into her eyes, the light slowly fading. Koza grunted as he ripped his hand out of her abdomen, leaving her tottering on her weakening legs. He looked at me, echoing the same warning I had given her. "You'll receive no mercy from me."

She grabbed her front, a smile psychotically growing on her whitening face. She melted into the ground in a white mass, her swords suffering the same fate. Slow clapping shook us from our shared achievement. "What was it you so naively said, y _our eyes do not affect me_?"

X*****X

 **I want to thank all that reviewed, especially in my last chapter. It's the amazing things like that that make it easier to keep writing. I feel particularly proud of this chapter for some reason too, I don't really have a doubt here. Also I just had a real tough time uploading this silly document. PHEW! Though I wasn't going to be able to do it!**

 **Anyway! I hope it's enjoyed. :)**

 **"** **We are all aspiring to something."**


	20. part 20

Part 20

I was at Sesshomaru's side in an instant, the fallen wolf demon to my left forgotten in the heat of the moment. My fear was stronger than my apprehension over what he was thinking, overpowering the strong emotions I had been feeling as of late. He ignored my questions and my stares, only glaring into the bushes beyond the river. My voice caught, "They're back."

My mind was reeling and my body went into fight or flight mode. My actions became more fluid and simple, nothing done without reason or motive. I moved automatically, stepping away from Sesshomaru with a purpose and with a plan. I doubt he even noticed.

I rallied the other wolves, their fear leaving the air thick and grungy. I pushed them to gather their weapons and arms, encouraging the weaker to take up bows and long range items, while the strong fled the cave and entered the battle. I stood strong and I barked my orders. I was confident, though completely surprised that they accepted my leadership.

"Alright, now everyone work with me and hold this line! Aim, shoot, reload, repeat, aim, shoot, reload, repeat!"

Their fear was replaced with determination as they took up my rhythm, arrows and other projectiles launched with such power. I gave a war cry as my arrow hit a demon in the chest dead center, purifying it on the spot. Several others fell, arrows sticking haphazardly out of their limbs and torso's. Our chant kept us going, kept us moving, even as they seemed to never end.

I glanced over every now and again, making sure Inuyasha and Sesshomaru's new ally Jaken was safe. They huddled with the other children, their bodies as close as possible.

I reached for my final arrow as the demons closed in, charging it with as much power as I could muster. A dying scream stopped me from releasing the arrow as I grew cold. My line of wolves was breaking and they fell in shallow waves.

The rainbow clad demons smiled through their mangled faces as they turned our own against us. Once trusted comrades slaughtered their friends; their families. They continued to smile as the arrows raining down on them hit the mark, but flowed right through them, like shooting through a sphere of water. Others whom we shot down earlier stood, the arrows sliding slowly out of their fur like syrup, hitting the ground completely clean. "What is happening?"

The air became thick with the scent of rusted iron and panic. I started to shake, my arrow knocking against my bow with each vibration. I couldn't calm down. I couldn't. My grip faltered and I released my arrow, the power of my fear and determination surging off with every airborne moment. My aim was off, way off, the arrow hitting the dirt, spraying one of the creatures with the soiled earth. It hissed, its face darkening. Before it could react, the ground beneath it exploded, the blast incinerating several other demons standing around. They registered a moment of surprise and awe at the explosion before disappearing in a flash of light. Others lost focus on their battles, their hypnotic control over the wolves broken. They walked towards the light of the explosion, captivated by the brightness.

I fell to the ground panting, adrenaline coursing through my blood. The wolves around me cheered as I sat back, their vigour renewed as they were freed and a hole was made in the enemy's ranks. My eyes drifted shut as the drain on my powers made itself known. I got lost in the world around me, as though I didn't exist. I could still hear the battle. Hear the chains rattling and heavy nets gathered for catching the demons being maneuvered; dying men and blood spilling; groans and grunts of the injured. I was lost in it all, drifting away…

A loud blood curdling scream forced my eyes open, racking my body with chills. I covered my ears tightly, trying to block out the sound. The sound came two more times, chilling me and paralyzing me in place. I looked around, tears dripping generously down my cheeks. I never saw the attack coming. I never had a chance to even attempt to move. I was surrounded by a bright white light flying at me with superhuman speed as time slowed to a near stop.

X*****X

 _The blood will continue to rain down on the battle field, and the screams will forever be lost in the crimson soil. And so shall we be consumed by the black and hate that manifests to create, the darkness within will blossom, and it will be reborn._

X***X

I spun around, my face bored as I looked upon my new enemy. She smirked broadly, her tapered teeth pearly and dangerous. She was a complete doppelgänger of the woman whom we just fought. ' _The real one shows herself.'_

I glared and she winked. I growled and she laughed lightly. _'I will not be made a fool by some demon. A weaker female demon no less.'_

I pushed in front of Koza, his wounds leaving him half-conscious on the ground. I huffed, annoyed that his battle became mine and irritated by the arrogance of the woman. His weakness disgusted me and I reached down, snatching his sword right out of his hand. He put up no fight to retrieve it, only willingly submitting to my dominance over the situation. I twirled the lesser sword skillfully, feeling how the blade handled. _'Not as fine as my Tensuiga, but at least this sword will kill.'_

I didn't wait for her to take the first blow this time. I was aware of her eyes now, and I knew her style. Strike first, strike fast. I gained the advantage with this new blade, forcing her back. Her face dropped, the smirk wiped clean off.

"You are faster I see. Holding back last time were you?"

Her attempt to goad me into verbal battery was hopeless, I have nothing to say to a demon that uses trickery to defeat an opponent.

With some fancy attacks and some quick sharp jabs with the katana I liberated from Koza, I forced her back further and further, tripping her over the fresh carcass of a wolf. I managed to slide us closer to the battlefield where her minions were slowly overtaking our own forces.

The ground was no longer parched, but stated with the constant flow of warm blood. The sky was no longer clear, but mashed with the scent of fear, sweat and smoke; the failed attempts at holding our rainbow enemies off.

Her unsteady footing left her exposed and I took the opening. She attempted to block my attack as I sliced down, leaving a jagged and deep cut along her arm and across her cheek. She screamed in agony as she clutched her arm, willing the blood to stop. She wiped her cheek, feeling the blood on her fingers as her face darkened.

"You bastard!" She cried. "This had better not scar!" She leapt at me, a new fire fueling her movements. Her swords sliced through the thin air, the whistle of the blades loud as they passed harmlessly near my ears.

I never abandoned my bored look as her face mangled into a scowl. Her rage made her predictable and her movements sloppy, but still skillful enough to evade my attacks. An explosion rocked the earth, hitting her harder than it did me. I took the distraction and used it to my advantage. I brought my sword down hard, as though I intended to cleave her in two. She blocked and I used the excess force to push her further down and closer to me before I reversed direction, slicing straight up and into her. Her face was stunned as she fell to the ground. Blood coated my blade as I took a step back, shaking the filth off. Her eyes were wide with surprise, her hand traveling almost automatically to the new gash across her collar bone and up the side of her neck and cheek. I stepped forward to finish it, but her scream caught me off guard. I could feel the pitch tingle my spine, stopping me in my track. Her face was bone white as she looked deep into my eyes, her own widening as she gripped a lock of her silky rainbow hair tightly in her bloody fist. Her eyes turned black as she screamed again. She rose quickly, as though her body was being tied up with invisible threads.

She dropped her hair, the thick mass turning black to match her eyes as she hissed. A small orb began to glow around her mouth, getting larger and brighter with every moment. I stood ready, my Katana poised. She screeched a death scream, her own blades splashing as she threw them to the ground in her rage. She wretched her head to the side, releasing her light. The thin beam of light was pure energy, compressed enough to be deadly, large enough to be unavoidable. Her minions stopped in their tracks, the light captivating them, their eyes enlarging as the beam seemed to move in slow motion past them.

The change in her nature was so sudden with the way she redirected her attack, I almost missed her intent. Her actions were so sporadic and erratic, I didn't even think before I acted. I was flying at light speed, my body nothing more than a ball of light, moving slightly faster than her own beam. I landed beside her target, my voice carrying across the battlefield as I wrapped my arms around her thin frame. I yelled as we were overtaken by the light. I released my pent frustration in a sound with no words. It was in that one sound, that the battle was silenced, and the world no longer existed, not without this Kagome.

X*****X

 **-Just got back from a small little vacation to the lake so,, That's why I haven't been updating for a while there. But, I managed to finish another chapter so all's well!**

… **So much seemingly endless dramatics in my writing. I do notice that I overuse intense language and how I leave cliff hangers and such. But I like doing it so I probably won't stop. Keeps me interested aha.**

 **Also, should I go back and re-write the first few paragraphs? I know they are terribly written, I know that. I'm almost considering doing it. Not changing anything really plot wise, just fixing the mistakes and giving a bit more to work with. Then again, I like to see how far I've come since I started. I don't know. I might, might not. -**


	21. part 21

Part 21

I let the feeling of a warm body and senseless coddling lull me into a false sense of security. I knew the war was still raging and I know our side is losing, but, I heard nothing. I saw nothing. I felt... What did I feel? I was warm, and above all I felt I was safe. I stared out into the nothing, my eyes tired and spotty from the bright light I had seen. I blinked- once, twice, but it didn't clear. All I could see was endless white. I closed my eyes again, my mouth oddly dry as I swallowed the anxiety swelling in my throat. Then it happened. My left arm burst into pain, like a thousand thousand hot needles stabbing in and out of my flesh. My arm buckled as I tried to retract it, to steal it away from the source of my agony. I did not cry out, I didn't make a sound; not as though the pain would let me anyway. I sucked in a breath through my clenched teeth, tears pricking my eyes from underneath the closed lids. I groaned, waiting for the sensation to alleviate. When it didn't, I puffed, forcing my eyes open once again. What I saw took my breath away.

Sesshomaru crouched on the dirty ground, his arms wrapped tightly around my form. I panted, adrenaline flowing through me with every beat of my heart. He reached his clawed hand up, his nails growing longer as they reached my face. I looked into his eyes, his unblinking red piercing my soft brown. I managed a garbled whisper as he brushed back a single tear, "Sesshomaru."

He growled, lifting me confidently. A path cleared as he stalked toward the cave where Inuyasha and Jaken sat with teary eyes. No one moved, it sounded as though no one even breathed. He looked me over one final time, his hands holding and lingering over places that no longer held feeling; my forearm, my shoulder; my hand. He growled to me, though not harshly, before turning back to the woman, "Stay."

X*****X

My body moved of its own accord, tackling Kagome with a mighty roar. Her lips parted though any sound she made was lost with the explosion. The blast sent me flying, landing hard on the ground. My rage welled as I looked at the bundle I pressed tightly to my chest.

She didn't stir; didn't even speak as I felt her tense beneath my touch, her arm jerking back in a pain I couldn't heal. Her left arm was burned badly; the skin blistered and pulled taut to the bones and muscle beneath. Upon her reaction, I regretted even attempting to peel back the cloth that clung to her scorched skin.

I responded to her pain oddly. I could feel my inner Inu yōkai, my more primal side rising fast, and I let him. She looked up at me, my heart swelling knowing she was conscious. I reached for her face, my claws elongating as I brushed the pad of my thumb under her eye, stealing her tear. When she uttered my name, I could feel my beast soar, rising higher, needing to be free.

It was expected that a path would be cleared for me, but I snarled for good measure. I inspected the damage to her once more, noting how her arm no longer tensed under my touch. With the battle playing out in my head like water running over a fall, I relived each moment endlessly; analyzing, thinking. ' _How did she trick me?_ ' It only added to my rage, spurring my beast more. I looked at our enemy, the wench responsible for all this pain, ready to succumb to the creature I inherently am.

She laughed, her face now tortured with a wide mouthed grin, a mouth that seemed to take over her face. Her sharp teeth grew in length as her body contorted. Her mouth grew larger still, taking over the majority of her once fine visage. Her skin broke apart, tearing and ripping at invisible seams while tufts of ugly brown and tan fur jumped out. Her true form was disturbing; as different as salt is to sugar.

Her body was that of a moth; in shape but not size. She was looming, her body manifested into a disgusting yet enticing creature. Her torso was rather plain, blending in to the trees, though her wings radiated warmth. As she flexed her mighty wings, the light reflected off them, shimmering in many colours and hues as vibrant as the sun itself.

Her overall appearance was offset by her large mouth- a jagged set of teeth on an otherwise small head. She stood on three pairs of non-sturdy legs; legs which seemed as though they would rather snap than support her large girth. A steady stream of saliva dripped from her jaws, pooling at the base of her front most limbs which were adorned with a nasty set of claws, sharp enough to cut a boulder in half with minimal effort. She roared, a sound that belonged more to a beast of fangs and paws than wings and rainbows. I snarled back as I stole the show with my own transformation. My skin pulled and shifted revealing my own change. My brilliance was blinding as I shamed her fur with my silvery mane. I thought of my pack as I transformed. I imagined them, smiling and happy; and this time, I will be there to protect them, not hurt them. This time, I will have control. Stamping my heavy paw onto the ground I roared, a challenge to her as my own voice overpowered all with its intensity.

' _Inuyasha. Kagome.'_

X***X

 _Beneath the sky, the bright blue sky, tears of crimson fall. Beneath the leaves, the emerald green leaves, their cries of pain will rise. Beneath the sun, the golden orange sun their threat will be diminished; for in your eyes, your soft hazel eyes, my power will remain extreme._

X***X

I landed heavily on my side, my soft silver fur sullied green and red from the grisly grass stained with our blood. I landed with an involuntary grunt, my chest deprived of oxygen for a brief span of seconds. I stood with a growl and, shaking my shaggy mane free of loose debris, roared at her with all the rage I held in my body. My feathered tongue fell out of my mouth mid roar, allowing a purple poison to drip dangerously to the ground, eating away at the trees and vegetation below. The miasma spread but had less effect than I had hoped on a being so large. My only option to do damage was to infect her with it directly, but my only concern, was for the people scattering down below.

My opponent smirked as best she could through her own pain. Her wings were in tatters, torn open and left gaping with holes my claws inflicted as we scrapped. The fine down that adorned her wings fell in a constant shimmering rain, leaving what remained of her wings bare and lackluster. Though the holes were large and torn in odd shapes she maintained her ability to fly, as though she were supported by some invisible source, leaving me looking up from the ground. _'She will pay for sullying my fur, and she will die for cutting my skin.'_

I scanned my surroundings, my eyes landing upon a small mountain crest jutting out of the ground like a thorn imbedded beneath the earthy skin. She swiped one of her arms at me, the claws grazing against my fine fur as I did my best to dodge her weak attack. I snarled in pain as I launched myself up and across our battlefield, already anticipating her furious retreat skyward. With no hope to defeat me directly, she took to deceit and trickery, preferring to wound and maim than fight me directly. She hovered inches out of my reach, but did not anticipate my next move. Her arrogant demeanour throughout the battle left her over-confident and therefore exposed. I landed on the rocky outreach and launched myself with all the power I could muster. She screamed as she failed to evade my cunning counterattack and I hit her broad side. In a tumble of fur and wings, claws and fangs we fell to the ground, her bulk landing on my side. I landed painfully as her weight crushed down on leg and torso. I heard a faint series of _cracks_ as my hearing wavered, but they were cracks all the same.

It was a pain I had never felt before, and a pain I had never dreamed I would in fact experience. I was, after all, the lord of the west's heir, and now as circumstances pit their cards against me, the lord himself. I am not like other beings. I am made of stronger stuff; stronger will and blood if you please. But this common creature, this abomination! She wounded me, by chance I might add. Every step I took was its own torture. Every attack caused me agony. To defend was more relief but to counter her was horror. Even now as we face off, I stand on my broken leg. Even now as I have a chance to rest the joint, I stand like a mountain. I didn't let it show and I won't; for if I do, I may as well lay in defeat. I will not lose to her; these inconveniencing pains will not hinder me. She will not get that satisfaction of seeing me suffer. She will fall, and I will rise.

X*****X

 **Hi. Hope this is enjoyable so far, I think I may have a different style in this chapter VS the rest though. Not a bad thing. I just noticed,,,**

 **I** **am really getting into this though! Love writing... Just thought it necessary to mention, Yes Sesshomaru is probably way out of character, but that's the fun about a fan fic, uummm, I know he would have been more than a match for this moth as the demon we know and love him as but I will blame it on the fact that he is young and inexperienced, seeing's how he just become a lord and gained responsibilities and has people to protect where as with just himself, he can avoid this conflict or dispatch them quickly etc.**

 **Anyway, have a good one all.  
I will try to move the story along in the next chapter and end this war thing I have going on. We need more Kagome and Sesshomaru togetherness I think. Also, I conclusion soon would be good I think, then on to the next one!... I don't have a plan yet but it will happen. **


	22. part 22

Part 22

My blood was pounding in my ears as my heart lurched. I could feel my head throb and my lips part. My feet were moving before I could even register that the scream I heard, came from my own lips. The words were meaningless, almost soundless as I cried them through teared eyes. The only thing I could remember calling out, was Sesshomaru's name.

"Kagome! Kagome Stop!" It was a command spoken with panic, but I didn't slow. I sidestepped my way through the crowds, through the rainbow demons and wolf demons alike. The voice calling me faded.

"Sesshomaru!" I stopped and screamed from the edge of the battlefield, immobilizing everyone in place with the pain and pitch of my voice. He spared me a sideways glance, but didn't take his eyes off his opponent. I could see the pain he was masking. I could see it.

"Kagome!" The voice grabbed me, holding me in place. I wretched against them but to no avail. The mystery man grabbed my face in his hands, forcing me to look at him. It was Koza. "Kagome, look at me and breathe. There is nothing you can do for Sesshomaru right now. The best thig you could do, is help us here. Just, stay safe so he can focus. Okay?"

I stared into his eyes, his green eyes. _'Koga's are blue.'_ I focused on him as his grip lessened. His face was calm, a mask reserved only for the strongest; the leader of the pack. A mask that must remain flawless and un-cracked, weathering the pain and daily issues associated with a clan. While his demeanour radiated strength, I could see how worn out he really was. The wounds Sesshomaru inflicted were still seeping and raw, concerning me to no end, and the battle only worsened his state. Whereas I was fighting only for Inuyasha, he was fighting for his clan, for the many demons who look to him every day. I realized how selfish I was being. How stupid. In a voice barley more than a whisper I spoke, "I'm sorry."

"Kagome. You may never be mine. But I don't want to see you get hurt. Besides, we can't afford to distract Sesshomaru. We can't defeat her on our own. Not like this." His lips formed a cocky smile but I could see the helplessness in his eyes. He was at another's mercy, he was dependant on another for help, and he can't protect his family alone. He just can't. He knew that.

Our moment was cut short by a disturbance to our rear. The fighting continued as the demons resumed their attack. Their queen wounding Sesshomaru seems to have renewed their vigour and spurred the battle forward, and not in our favour. "Kagome!"

The wolf that had been my anchor grabbed me and spun 180 degrees. We fell in a jumble of limbs, confusion and blood. His body went limp as he landed on me. One of his own clansmen stepped away from us, a gory sword hanging in his grip. Tears dripped from the attacker wolf's eyes as he begged me to help him. "I… I can't control myself. End it please….Oh what have I done?"

I sat there with Koza hugged to my chest, shocked. "I… I…"

The wolf closed his hypnotized eyes as he fought the moth demons powers. In a second I wish I could forget, he turned the sword on himself and slid it effortlessly into his own body. Blood gushed from his mouth as he fell to the ground, peace written on his face.

I slid out from under Koza as I shook fresh tears from my eyes. Koga narrowed in on us, on his father. He grabbed his hand as I sat dazed in the mud. I checked Koza's wound, his back slit open with a perfect incision; the damage was extensive. I could see things that should not be exposed to the outside world. ' _He's a demon. He can survive this right? Right?'_ I glanced back at Sesshomaru as Koga cried, but only for a moment. _'You can't lose Sesshomaru. You can't.'_

I grabbed a bow out of the muck, gathered as many fallen arrows as I could and started my attack. Several other wolves surrounded Koga and his fallen father, helping me repel the demons. _'Koga. I'm so sorry.'_

X*****X

I growled deep in my throat as I stepped on my damaged leg. The fall left us both bruised and broken, though I couldn't tell who was worse off. Testing my leg again, I felt my limb scream as the ligaments pulled and tensed. Contrary to my first belief, it was not broken. Painful, but not broken. I can still win.

I eyed her status. She was not fairing much better than I. Her wings were torn from my claws and her sides displayed a wide range of gashes I left with my serrated claws. The battle was close to over.

A high pitched scream stole my attention for a moment, but not a second longer. ' _Kagome.'_ I saw a pair of strong arms grab her, so I ignored it. Worry still grabbed at my gut.

The distraction was enough to initiate her first move. She launched at me, her long claws open and blood thirsty. I roared a challenge as I reared, grabbing her in my claws. She screamed as I pushed her under me, but my grip only tightened. I managed to hold her down long enough to sink my teeth into her neck. Her blood was repulsive, bitter and burning, but I didn't let go; I couldn't.

She flipped and raged, her body rapidly shaking and shifting in my teeth. She raked my stomach and sides with her claws as I shook my head. She convulsed once more before I felt her weaken, felt her start to change back. I released her as her mangy scruff retreated into her skin. I followed her transformation, becoming once more my hidden self.

She laid stretched out at my feet, her body covered in many punctures and fluids; blood, saliva, poison. I was likewise wounded, but my body was well enough to remain upright. Even now I could feel my healing power taking effect. I rolled my eyes around to glimpse the battlefield. Many of her minions were still alive, though their power seemed to be dropping. They were not especially strong; not for me anyway, and the wolves haven't slaughtered even a fraction. ' _Useless.'_

"H…Hey. Dog. Don't ignore me. D…Don't… count me out, 'til my final breath."

She looked at me from beneath a veil of her mangled hair, black interspersed with ribbons of many hues. She reached for her sword at her hip but struggled to draw the weapon from her position on the ground. She laughed before going limp. Acceptance.

"Well? What are, you waiting for? Finish me..." She seemed to chew on the words before spitting them at my feet, her tongue becoming thick and distorted. Her life was fading.

"My patience is not to be mistaken for hesitance. You are going to die. However, it is not my place to kill you." I turned as a familiar scent grew stronger. She wasn't alone. "It's his."

X*****X

I fought through the tears. I fought through the pain. I blocked out the sounds; my bow string snapping as arrows flew; Koga sobbing through confused words; war cries shouted from the raw throats of hundreds. The earth shook as Sesshomaru pinned the giant moth to the ground. Her blood was so potent even I could smell it; the horrible stench, nothing like the iron we were used to.

The battle slowly turned in our favour, the many beautiful demons slaughtered one after the other. They stopped rising, stopped reviving. Our spirits lifted. All, except Koga's. I took the turn in events as a chance to check on him; on Koga.

I dropped my bow and fell to my knees. He didn't even move. His face was tear streaked, the crystal drops falling continuously down his thin cheeks. Koza was still, his eyes shut tight and his lips parted. "He made me leader." He whispered harshly through his throat. I could hear the sobs he was holding back. "He made me leader." He spoke more confidently as he looked me in the eye. His eyes held a fire within them that was previously non-existent.

With an unspoken consent, I grabbed his hand and he squeezed mine. Ignoring the fighting going on around us, I placed us in a barrier before we walked untouched to Sesshomaru. Whether by fear or repulsion for my shield, both fighting sides parted for us. I heard naught, save for Sesshomaru's voice as we drew to a stop. "It is not my place to kill you. It's his."

X*****X

The stench of saline tears assaulted my senses as Kagome and the Wolf demon child approached. It was repulsive, though not aggravatingly so. I could hear the mothy woman behind me groaning in pain, or was it anger? Either way, I could not tell nor did I particularly care. The boy was obviously distressed, his shoulders squared in an insane attempt to display courage, strength and maturity. He was none of those things.

He stood in front of the wounded woman, his hands balled into tight fists. Without saying a word I drew a sword from my sash and held it out to him. He grabbed it without hesitation. "My father's sword, how fitting it should cut you down."

"You… Insolent, brat. You think… This is a, win for the Wolf Tribe? You… Are nothing. Without this Dog… You would all… be… dead…"

Koga's face darkened as he raised his arm, his grip tight and his hand shaking. She smiled and laughed through the blood in her mouth as he brought the sword down; her final defiance. He turned away as the blood sprayed, a single tear leaking out of his eye. His face hardened as he inherited his father's flawless mask, inherited the tribe and all its faults and pain. He looked back to where Koza's corpse laid, his face calm.

"Sesshomaru, is… I mean… Tensuiga?" Kagome turned to me as she spoke.

I was impressed she knew the power of Tensuiga, though it didn't show. I gave my head a small shake. I was not blind to the fight around me. I could see how mangled his body had become. With a bored tone I answered her hopeless question. "That much damage is… irreparable. Even for me."

X*****X

 **Well? WELL! What you think? I did speed up the fight scene, though I think it's elegant enough. Notice I did exaggerate Sess's broken arm, I didn't want it to be broken and I had to make it just cracked or whatever so… ya! I did Kill Koza off, gruesomely-ish, but that's the fate of my add-in OC's, haha. Ummm. I will either start the next chapter (I will clean up my loose ends then) or re-read everything I wrote! Because I'm at work and it's slow and I'm real bored. (I weigh semi-trucks all day so I have a little down time between) Anyways, has a good day all!**


	23. part 23

Part 23

X*****X

I leaned against a half broken tree, its canopy felled face first into the red dirt. Already death could be seen in the wrinkling leaves. I could feel the wind playing with my tangled hair, pushing it playfully from side to side. The last few hours took their toll on everyone, leaving us plunged in a silent twilight. I massaged my shoulder, the muscles pained and sore from drawing my bow string back so many times. Jaken was soundless, something I never experienced before, and so I basked in the glorious silence.

I stared absently at Sesshomaru and Inuyasha. After the moth demons death, he just took off, his destination only known to him. I realize now he meant to talk with Inuyasha, talk about the last few days. I took a deep breath, visions of the last hours playing in my head. As Koga executed that moth leader, the battle field went silent, followed by the sound of a thousand heart beats. The minions we were fighting against so hard dissipated into a cloud of colour, which upon further inspection, turned out to be hundreds of tiny coloured moths. _'That explains why they wouldn't die easily. They were not one being, they were hundreds!'_

We, the Wolf Demon tribe included, watched the moths roll and tumble around each other, shifting the rainbow cloud around and around as they drifted skyward. It was bittersweet to know the battle was over; that everything was over. So many died to fight these beings, Koga's father included, yet I could not bring myself to purify the cloud. I frowned as I remembered the moment, the conflicting feelings. _'I had a chance to avenge all that died today, to right some wrongs, but I couldn't. It… Why am I so weak?'_

"We're leaving." The voice startled me, though I didn't show it. Sesshomaru stood in front of me with his impassive stare as Inuyasha lagged behind. His posture looked unnaturally ridged, something that didn't escape me. I may not know him as well as I knew Inuyasha…know Inuyasha, but many of their mannerisms are similar, and I could tell something was not right, something was bothering him.

"You want me to go with you?" My voice was quiet and the question was sincere. I didn't expect him to want me back, to even talk to me let alone invite me along.

"Hnn." His typical response. I smiled inwardly.

I didn't speak as I nodded my consent. His shoulders seemed to relax slightly, but I dismissed it as nothing. I looked away as his burning gaze held mine, as his unblinking eyes focused on my slowly reddening face. I slyly excused myself, claiming that I needed to bid my farewell. I awkwardly stepped away, trying not to run as my cheeks took on a darker ruby tinge. _'What was that?'_

I could hear Inuyasha pattering behind me as I approached what was left of Koza's, I mean Koga's, clan. He had retrieved the scabbard for his katana and was seeming to take a pleasure in his new position, barking orders here and there as his father had. When he noticed me he dropped off a tree trunk he was standing on to greet us. "Koga."

"Kagome. Inuyasha. I see you are on your way again? I was hoping you might reconsider staying with us, even if it's just for the night. You know, after all you guys have done." His eyes were electrifying. He held a sense of power about him that made you want to follow him. He will, and does make a good leader.

"Sorry Koga, we have to be on our way. And I'm sorry again for your loss and hope you nothing but the best. May we meet again, and under more favourable circumstances." I bowed courteously to him, a gesture which he took with a curt nod. Inuyasha hung back as I slowly walked to Sesshomaru.

The sorry and pain in his eyes as I passed him, the memories, broke my heart. Sesshomaru must have spoken of his parents, of their parents. He seemed calmer, though his eyes were shiny with hidden sorrow. I watched them talk, their words short. It was a private conversation between friends, friends of mutual loss. They embraced quickly and just as fast were apart again, hands wiping at tears neither wanted the other to see.

I may have been young when my father passed, too young to remember anything more than a few scraps of my childhood with him, but I know the feeling of loss. I could never begin to contemplate that which either of them has lost, but I can understand. As I know they understand each other, more than anyone else ever could. ' _Maybe this can draw them together. Maybe they won't be so far apart in the future, maybe Inuyasha won't be so lost.'_

I stopped a short way from Sesshomaru and Jaken, waiting for Inuyasha to come back. The imp's voice was grating as he spoke of things unknown to me. His ramblings I blocked out as I looked at Sesshomaru. I took the moment to examine him. His eyes were closed and his arms were crossed but I know he could sense everything around him, me included. His features were mostly relaxed, bathed in a growing moonlight. The way he held himself was typical, like royalty, but he also seemed… Different. He seemed different.

He cracked one golden eye open and regarded me with the emotionless orb. I froze as he caught me staring, unable to look away. ' _Great! Look away look away look away!_ '

"Jaken." His voice was hard. This is the Sesshomaru I knew, but I want the one I've come to know back.

I shifted my gaze after a moment and stared instead at the purple strips running across his hands. They were uniform coloured. They were perfect, well I mean his eyes are perfect, he is…I mean… _'Kagome! Snap out of that he is looking at you. Great, now you're blushing.'_

I frowned and blinked my eyes to clear me spaced out brain. "Well? Are we going?" My voice seemed higher than normal, defensive. Sesshomaru cocked an eyebrow. The movement was so subtle I almost missed it.

"Hnn." In one fluid motion he dropped his hands and walked away. Jaken squawked at Inuyasha to catch up and I brought up the rear. The excitement of the last few days, and I use the word excitement sparingly for it definitely wasn't, distracted me from my goal. I had to get home. I had to get back to my time. My family. My friends. They need me. They need me to help finish our quest, and I need them. I held back tears as the weight of my loss fell upon me again; as I remembered things I didn't want to. And so, we marched through the forest to some unknown destination, my tears hidden, as we relied on the moonlight to be our guide.

X*****X

Patience. Father always said it takes patience to be a successful ruler, but I was born with none of that. Jaken spoke relentlessly, his voice going up and down with the excitement of his story. It was not a soothing voice like Kagome's, but more harsh and alien. ' _Like Kagome's?'_

I growled inaudibly in my throat, cursing myself as I cracked one eye so as to get a glimpse of her. To my surprise, she was looking at me. Her eyes widened after a minute and she broke contact. I watched her for a moment more before ordering Jaken silent. He listened, as always.

' _What do I find so tempting about this creature. She is… She is not the prettiest. She is not the strongest. She is not the wisest nor smartest. And she is a human, but. She is the kindest, the most accepting, and the most caring. Do I find that enticing?'_

Her sudden jump was unexpected, as was her abnormal voice and crimson skin. I cocked an eyebrow. _'I make her nervous. Good.'_

"Hnn." If she wants to go, let's not tarry here. I dropped my hands and stalked away, my pack following without question. I had no destination in mind, as I require nothing, but my followers needed rest, so a suitable camp was the first priority.

X***X

Our walk was short. An hour perhaps, before Inuyasha fell to the ground. Jaken huffed in annoyance as he tried to lift the exhausted hanyo, but succeeded only in stretching his red cloak.

"Inuyasha? Inuyasha wake up." Kagome was whispering softly, her voice clear in my ears. I turned back as she picked him up, indicating to Jaken to proceed.

"Hnn." I scanned the forest and noticed a clearing up ahead. I walked on as they wearily followed.

After parting the bushes I declared that, "We will stay here."

Jaken promptly fell against a tree while Kagome laid Inuyasha next to him. I studied her, how her eyes lingered on Inuyasha's sleeping face, how she made sure Jaken was comfortable with him before stepping away. She looked at me with a blank face, but emotional eyes. I had so much to say, but my mind was blanketed with anger and betrayal. With hurt.

"Jaken, watch Inuyasha." He grunted his acknowledgment of the order. "Kagome." My voice was rougher than I meant it to be and she flinched at her name, but I will not apologise.

Without making sure she was following, I led her deeper into the trees. I came upon a small knoll around which a stream flowed. Several insects flew past me, their hind ends blinking. More flashes answered from the confines of the bushes. The moon reflected off the flowing water and illuminated the small clearing. _'Perfect.'_ I rolled my eyes at the cliché setting, but refused to search elsewhere. I scented the air, making sure Jaken and Inuyasha were still close and safe.

I tried to wipe my face clear, to take away the anger and malice burning deep within. She entered the clearing and her breath caught. I felt a little pang of pride at choosing a place she enjoys, but buried it twice as fast. _'I didn't choose this place for her enjoyment.'_

I turned and looked her in the eye, prepared for an onslaught of babbling in response to my silence. She refused to meet my gaze. To speak. She stared at the water, her face blank. ' _I will not be ignored_.' I stepped towards her and growled deep in my throat, an involuntary reaction to my rage.

She turned quickly and met my burning gaze with one of timid sorrow. She looked at me deeply and frowned, her lip quivering slightly. I was prepared for her to speech. To rant and babble, even rage. In fact, I wanted her to, to show me something other than this silence. I can't predict her, if I don't know what she is feeling. But, I wasn't prepared for this, never for this.

Her eyes overflowed with tears as she walked up to me and laid her head on my chest, her shoulders shaking with silent sobs. She stopped just long enough to utter one word in a broken voice before she started crying uncontrollably again. "Sorry…."

I tensed as she cried against me, the rumble of my growl dying in my chest. The hatred in my heart stopped and my frown turned to one of confusion. ' _I really am in her trap.'_

I wrapped my arms around her as I touched the crown of her head with my cheek, wrapping her completely in my embrace. As her tears slowed to a casual trickle, she found her voice. "It's all my fault. Sorry. I'm so sorry."

I said nothing as she continued to mumble through my embrace. Her arms found their way around me and she hugged me back twice as hard, as though she was afraid to let me go. I eventually pushed her back gently, breaking the hug. Her eyes were red and puffy and her cheeks were mottled from the many tears she shed.

"Kagome." My voice was softer this time, softer than it has ever been, surprising even myself with the tenderness. She took in a deep shaky breath as I wiped the final tears from her eyes. "Why do you shed tears?" I wanted to hear it from her.

"I… I'm sorry, Sesshomaru. From the moment we met, we were on opposite ends. From the second we met. I didn't even give you a chance. I didn't…" The tears built up again but she brushed them away irritated. "When I almost killed you, and you attacked me. I… If I had listened and stayed away, that wouldn't have happened. If I had just listened, _none_ of this would have happened." She turned away from me, her eyes no longer contacting with mine. "I stole your brother from you. I accused you of not caring, of trying to hurt him. I turned your own brother against you with _my_ fear. The war… I… I could have gotten us all killed!"

She looked at me. My gaze was as always, impassive, but I could feel her words stirring my heart. "How? How can you just stand there and not say anything? I could have killed you! I could have gotten Inuyasha killed! Why are you so calm! How are you okay with this? With me! I screwed up so bad and you still say nothing!"

She was hitting me now with her weak fists, her voice broken and loud, even by human standards. Her tears fell as rain as she beat my chest, her voice full of pain, hurt and blame. ' _She blames herself for everything._ '

I grabbed her wrists and forced her to look at me. She hiccupped as my voice soothed her anger. "Kagome. Enough. I say nothing, not to anger or blame you, but because I _understand._ "

She stopped struggling and listened to me. "I don't want to hear any more explanations or excuses. You don't need a reason to be afraid, but you need a reason to act upon your fear. I understand those actions, as I have done the same." I released her hands. "I frighten you, and…" I blinked my eyes long and slowly as I paused, unsure of how to continue, "You frightened me."

She looked at me with an expression I could not place, her lips parted as if she was about to speak. I didn't give her that chance. "I wasn't in control that time. I could have killed you yes, and you me. All I could see, was the one who injured me. All I knew, was to attack; self-preservation. I am, no matter how much I resemble one, not human, and my instincts aren't like yours. I am aware that you could have killed me, but you didn't, and I am indebted for that."

"And I am indebted to you for saving me." Her eyes started to shine again, the tracks of salty tears evaporating into the warm night.

I allowed her to hug me again, returning the gesture with an embrace of my own. _'I'm not sure what happened, nor why I spoke of such things, but it felt, right. Felt right to be here with her, to console her. This feels right... Father, help me. Give me a sign, what is happening to me.'_

We spent the night by the water, her even breathing lulling me into a trance like state. I watched the stars slowly revolve around the world as she inched closer and closer to me. I watched the moon rise higher and higher into the sky as her dreams brought smiles to her face. I waited for the sun to rise, as I contemplated the turn in which my life has taken. I smirked, something I had never done, as Kagome breathed my name in her sleep. "Hnn."

X*****X

 **Wow. This was a looong chapter compared to my others. Please tell me what you think. I absolutely suck at mushy, gushy stuff, as I don't much care for it. (Well why write this type of story you might ask, and I respond with… I didn't think that part out!) Haha otherwise, from now out we will have more Kagome Sesshomaru together chapters and less of them fighting and making up and that whole circle. BTW I know Sess was pretty out of character again, but, I don't think we want Jaken and Inuyasha to know he likes a girl, a HUMAN GIRL! So it was ok when it was just the two of them :)**

 **Also, I'm going on a much needed vacation so I'll be busy tomorrow and can't post this chapter, so I'll post it early. I think it's ready!**


	24. Part 24

Part 24

X*****X

It was a moment I never thought I, Sesshomaru, would experience. Well, not so young anyway, maybe towards my deteriorating years; years in which an heir was desirable, or was a den; a home. And to find a home with a human of all creatures? They are so fragile, tender; dying before life even starts. Demon wenches on the other hand, while they tend to be a little more, how shall we say, shallow? Caddy? They are hardy and they do survive. Our lives are guaranteed similar years; hell, even a hanyo has a longer life. But, for creatures of such immense age and beauty, they are immature and unfit for the role I require out of a mate. My own mother is a testament to that; her frivolous attitude towards father drove him away… Drove me away. _'Father, what have these human women done to us?_ _She won't even live to be a fraction of my age. She_ _isn't_ _even a fraction of my age. She will experience a tiny portion of life compared to my impressive lifespan. We can't be together. Oh, how did you do it, knowing the end was inevitable, and closer than conceivable?'_

I looked down at Kagome's sleeping face, ignoring the persistent pain that built up in my chest at the thought of outliving her by millennia. I watched her slightly parted lips twitch in response to her dreams. I inhaled the fresh, crisp air; cool and sweet before being heated by the rising sun. The nautical dawn, the moments proceeding the slow rise of the sun, gave the clearing a mystical view. Though the dark did not hinder my vision, the mist that clung to the ground in ropey tendrils did. I relied heavily on my sense of smell and sound to assess our surroundings, the damp grass and gurgling brook interfering slightly. The trees were littered with glistening drops of diamond; liquid proudly displayed on the emerald leaves. I took the moment to actively examine a small specimen. I could see the small hairs on the leaf, the reflecting light trapped in the droplet. I sat comfortably, my thoughts slowly relaxing more and more until I was entranced with the plant. Nothing mattered in that moment. Nothing was more important than the plant; then this life force. Or was it? Kagome. She was important. Is. Inuyasha. Even Jaken. All life was equally important. _'Can I say that about all the demons I've killed? To someone. To them, they were…'_

I shook my head, frowning. _'It is too early to be trapped by such trivial thoughts. Disagreeable thinking is all it is. I've done what I must do to survive, too protect. I have no regrets about the lives I've taken; human or other._ '

"Hn." I shifted as I grunted my final say on the matter.

"What are you grunting about?"

I glanced down at Kagome, the frown sliding from my face as I perked a single eyebrow. She was looking at me, her eyes bright and her cheeks dusty red. I allowed myself a small smirk, a test. Her cheeks darkened but she didn't look away _. 'Are you in my trap as well?'_

"Hn, losing daylight." I looked away as she examined my face with a small frown.

"You're lying, what were you really thinking about?" She prodded deeper.

I looked back at her, tearing my gaze away from the trees bathed in the rays of the rising sun. My piercing stare was as uncomfortable for me as it was her. I couldn't look away. I couldn't take my eyes off of the being in my arms. The being I just spent my night with. _'I… I want her. I want to call her mine. I want to live the rest of her life making her happy. I will live the rest of mine with just the memories to get me through… Mine._ '

The admission settled something inside me. It was a longing; a sickness I didn't know I had trapped within. I felt, calmer than I ever had. I was the same overall, but the pain, a long growing pain, was gone.

"You."

I took a chance with my response, gauging her reaction subtly, but thoroughly. It was a tormenting moment, shattered by the loud childish voices of the rest of our party. Jaken and Inuyasha came stumbling into the clearing, their irritating behaviour at maximum power before the sun even peaked the horizon. I examined Kagome with my peripheral vision. This feeling will only grow. It will never go away. It is like the stars in the sky, not always seen, but will always be there.

X*****X

' _You? You. That's me. He was thinking about me? Why?'_

My thoughts were interrupted by a loud argument steadily growing louder and louder. I sighed as Sesshomaru turned towards the disturbance, his body already rising and his warmth already receding.

' _Is he embarrassed to be seen sitting with me? Is he upset I didn't answer? Is he mad? Maybe, does he not want people to think…? No. Never mind. Sesshomaru doesn't think like that. He must have meant something else. Anything else…'_

I shook my head and hid my feelings with a smile as Inuyasha and Jaken rounded the bushes. Their voices were high and locked in a battle; an argument suited for two children rather than a child sized demon.

"I am too strong, and I will only get stronger! Sesshomaru is going to teach me, he promised! He is going to teach me all his tricks and you will have to call me 'Lord Inuyasha' otherwise I'll… I'll be mean to you!"

"You daft child! I don't have to call you anything! I would call you an insolent half-witted pup if it was to please myself! You silly half bre…"

His voice trailed off into a groan as Sesshomaru stepped on his body, effectively silencing his rattling voice from spouting more insults.

"Enough, Jaken."

"Er, Yes, Milord. I didn't mean to offend Milord!" He managed to gargle out.

Inuyahsa's face fell as Jakens insinuation dawned on him, but Sesshomaru's actions gave him a little hope that he was thought of as more; more than what was in his blood. That he was, regardless of his parentage, still a living being, still Sesshomaru's kid brother, and still a son of the west; a royal.

X***X

I spent the day glancing casually at Sesshomaru as we walked through the trees; no particular place in mind. Danger was, as it always is, everywhere, but for the most part we were avoided. A group large as ours, and with Sesshomaru in the lead was not a healthy target for the attacker. In fact we made such a deadly target we encountered no other demons _. 'News of our war with those rainbow demons must have traveled. We must be revered as war gods by now.'_ The thought put a smile to my face. _'Sesshomaru, the war god and Lord of the Western Lands. God of the Western Lands.'_ I snickered as our group rounded a clump of trees into a small clearing.

"What's so funny Kagome? Tell me!" Inuyasha grabbed my skirt and pulled tightly, the cloth easily maneuvered down my hips.

I grabbed the garment and hiked it back up. "Inuyasha! Not the skirt! And it's nothing, it's nothing."

His face turned to a pout before he smiled broadly, tapping me playfully on the thigh. "Can't catch me!"

I crossed my arms and watched him as he bounded away. I rolled my eyes dramatically as I surprise attacked him. He was, as I assumed, more agile and dodged my attack easily, but not without screaming first, causing an already relaxed Sesshomaru to grimace.

As I failed in many attempts to catch Inuyasha and the newly recruited Jaken, I set my sights on an easier target, one whose questioning stares didn't go unnoticed. I edged my way up beside him and whispered softly to his resting form, "Sesshomaru."

"Hn." He cracked one of his startling golden eyes open.

"You're it."

X*****X

I sighed. What more could I do? To continue walking with a group so full of energy would be more tiring than listening to their complaints later; so I indulged them. We stayed in the clearing while they played some sort of prey game; the objective of which seemed simple enough. Catch your opponent. Even Jaken was masterfully indoctrinated into the game; though his participation was simply for the retrieval of his hat.

I sighed again; their game was dying down and I could sense her nearing my spot of rest. Her fragrance was sweet, tinged with the scent of perspiration, giving me an electrifying adrenaline rush.

Her voice in my ear sent a single tingle down my spine. Something that didn't go unnoticed by my beast. He was enjoying this.

I feigned boredom as I cracked one eye and looked at her as she whispered my name, her face flushed and her hair beautifully wild.

"Hn." I didn't trust my voice to say anything.

Her lips parted slowly as she leaned a little closer, her shirt rustling loudly in my pounding ears, her hand twitching above my knee. I felt my heart jump as she brushed the fine fabric. "You're it."

 _What?_ She backed away slowly, then more quickly as she beckoned me to stand.

"Can't catch me." Her taunt echoed Inuyasha's earlier statement.

I listened, to my surprise, and allowed her to lead me on in their game of cat and mouse. Her steady retreat from me fueled my predatory instincts, driving me to follow, to give chase. _'I can, and will.'_

With an inhuman movement, a motion she wouldn't have even seen, I was in front of her. Her jump and squeak of surprise delighted me, fueling my desire to chase higher and higher, to hunt; to be the predator I am.

She took off running, her legs moving mountain slow compared to the hype of my adrenaline. Nothing, not even a falling star could escape me now. I teased her several more times, appearing in front of her, beside her, above her. My heart was pounding harder and harder as her voice took on a panic when she realized that escaping me was futile. Her laugh was a drug, more potent than even the finest sake. A single breath was enough to put me in a haze.

My vision narrowed as she stopped and stared me down. I purred as she smirked, my stomach coiled tightly in anticipation of her next move.

I crouched slightly, my head swimming as I adjusted my position. She made her move and I was on her before her foot hit the ground.

My balance was compromised by the drunken fog I was floating in, regrettably knocking both of us to the grass. I forced her to land atop me, preventing injury as I hit the ground first. I didn't even feel the impact. I rotated and rolled, locking her beneath my muscular frame. "I win."

I was intensely aware of her legs tangled in mine as we laid in the grass; of how her shirt had rolled up, exposing a small strip of the skin on her abdomen. I refrained from glancing down.

Jaken took that moment to usher Inuyasha out of our sight and back to our camp as I stared at Kagome. His voice was groaning something about being inappropriate for a child. _'Was I?'_

I could feel her chest heaving under me; feel her heart hammering through her ribs. Her smile broadened as she laughed, scolding me for my lack of understanding the rules of 'tag.'

I said nothing as my eyes sparkled. I heard nothing as I held my prize; only the rhythm of my heart beating to hers. I tightened my embrace, pulling her off the ground and closer to me. Her heart jumped and sped up as I shifted so I was kneeling over her. Her smile faded, but the feeling was there. It had to be there.

"Sesshomaru…" Her voice was soft, a voice I haven't had the pleasure of experiencing before. _'It is there.'_

I rumbled deep in my chest, an unfortunate reveal to my own feelings inside. She put one hand on my chest, the action sparking a desire inside. I took a deep breath to clear my head. Time was up.

"We should go…. Kagome."

X*****X

I had started the night with Inuyasha wrapped tightly around my core. However, his slumber proved to be too restless as I had to distance myself from his thrashing limbs. How Jaken survived the previous night curled against the young child was a mystery to me.

I took a deep breath, silently wishing for nothing more than my ugly yellow backpack. No matter how many times the narrow straps tore into my shoulders from the excess weight, the items were always useful; particularly, my sleeping bag. I glanced over at Inuyasha and Jaken. They were sprawled recklessly across Sesshomaru's pelt, the warmth something I was tempted to face Inuyasha's unconscious wrath for. A dull throb in my side made the decision for me. I will stay here.

My mind wandered as sleep avoided my tired body. I was forced to think. To imagine things that happened and things that would never happen. Finally, I was forced to reimagine the day, and worst of all, my feelings.

' _Sesshomaru what are you doing to me. You and your brother have a way of making an impression on people's lives. You, in particular, are hard to read. What are you thinking? Feeling? And where do I fit in to it?'_

I glanced over at him, how he sat tall and still. He didn't move as the forest crept slowly past us, as the creatures in the dark swept by silently.

I closed my eyes as I thought back to our game of tag. How he tackled me. How I felt when he looked at me. _'I haven't felt that way before. Not even when, well, I would look at Inuyasha back in the day. This was completely different. This was something new.'_

I thought back to the moment he pulled me closer, pressing his lean body to mine; how his chest vibrated with his growl. When I touched him; he pulled away _. 'Did I do something? Did I do something wrong?'_ The mere thought of it was enough to redden my cheeks and speed up my heart. _'Calm down girl. Calm down. What was that all about? Does he even know what he does to me? Does he even know? He must. Why else would he do this?'_ I shivered; energized.

I jumped as I felt something brush against my side, my eyes snapping open. "Sesshomaru! You scared me." I whispered harshly.

"You are cold." His directness was something I could not get used to.

"I was. And you? You are not here just because you thought I was cold? Are you?" I curled into him, resting my arm across him before I lost my nerve.

He didn't respond. "Is silence a no?" I looked up at him.

"Yes."

I gave him a quizzical look, the conversation lost in my fuzzy, tired mind.

His face took on what I assumed to be amusement, "No to your original question."

I twisted and grabbed his armour, pulling myself higher on him, high enough I could look him in the eyes. "Then, why are you here?"

He leaned forward and rested his forehead on mine. He slipped his hands around my lower back and pulled me tighter to him. I took a deep breath as my eyes fell closed, inhaling his distinct scent. His unique scent. I automatically wrapped my arms around his neck, lacing my fingers through his long, silky silver hair. I felt him sigh as he breathed out a husky answer.

"You."

X*****X

 **Hi fellow anime/manga lovers. Is there anything you want to see happen specifically or anything you don't want to see? Perhaps you are a fan of the cliché (in a nice way) love story or maybe you want something different? (I want this one too!) Any ideas/thoughts on this? Perhaps we need some tragedy before we can have some happiness. Maybe some want more romantic stuffs? Perhaps you guys are content with my work, or want less fluff as it is so called (I'm, personally, a fan of fluff sometimes) If/when I write deeper details about their newly developing relationship, I'm sorry if it's awkward or anything. Romantics, writing about it anyway, is sooo awkward for me. Ima try though! Thanks for reading!**


	25. part 25

Part 25 – **The rating had to go up as a precaution. By the way.**

Her hands twined through my hair; fingers scratching the sensitive skin with perfection. She massaged slowly as I closed my eyes, growling deeply with the stimulation. I was losing myself, something that was alarming for me; but, I didn't stop it. I didn't want it to stop. She shifted so she was sitting back on her knees, one of her slender legs placed precariously between my own, straddling my thigh. She dropped her hands onto my shoulders as I grazed my teeth along her neck, stopping just below her ear. I felt her shudder as I nipped gently at the skin, her hands balling into fists. I started my own assault on her senses, dominating the situation. My hands gripped the back of her thighs sensually high as I removed her leg from between mine, pushing it to my other side. She straddled me as I pulled her higher on my lap, my hands twitching with need. My lips found the sensitive spot on her neck where her blood flows and she arched willingly, a welcome gesture of submission. I could feel her heart beat beneath the flawless skin as she tried to suppress a sigh and I could feel her face and neck heat up with embarrassment. I backed off her, my own craving stealing away my sanity; my common sense. I took a deep breath, my hands hovering desirably over her warm skin.

"Kagome, do you want me to stop?" My voice was heavy and deep, saturated with desire as I whispered into her ear.

"No." She shook her head; voice barely a whisper, but she seemed to be in disagreement with herself. The subtle nervous looks, the shake in her voice, they were uncharacteristic of this strong woman; always so sure of herself. She was not ready for this. She was scared? Perhaps apprehensive or anxious? It doesn't matter; her mind and body were not one. Where I knew what I wanted, she did not, and it was not my place to push it on her.

I gave a small twitch of my lip as I lifted her chin with a single finger. I could hear her heart speed up, could see the anticipation in her eyes. I would grant myself one step toward my desire, and force myself to suffer and wait for her to choose the next. Her lips parted as I leaned in, an invitation to keep going. I grazed her gently, urging her to open more. She obliged and I deepened the kiss. Our dance of tongues was not to be matched and our passion was not something one could fake. It was real; this was real. I ran my hands through her hair, trying to somehow bring her closer to me than she already was. When at last she could not breathe, she pulled away; her cheeks dusty red as she broke our eye contact.

"You do not yet know what you want. I will wait, Kagome. I will wait." I smoothly rolled her off me and wrapped my arm around her for warmth. I focused on pacing my breathing, slowing my heart, and calming myself. _'Kagome. Oh what you do to me.'_

X***X

My sleep was really not sleep at all, more of a trance induced by my deprived state; a state of mental and internal reparation. With my demon blood at full heat it was necessary to preserve my strength, calm my nerves and steady my beast inside. It was, however, surprising to realize my body shut itself down. It's been years since I was pushed to this point; this amount of rest has never been a necessity. I could still sense my surroundings, my nose and other senses working at full capacity, seeing things my eyes did not; in other words, I could still protect my… Family? Is this my family now? What an odd prospect. My family is nothing more than a human girl, a small half demon child, and an imp. Nothing more, but nothing less either. I learned that the hard way; they're nothing less than what they are.

My dreams were not dreams, but thousands of years' worth of memories compiled and played in no particular order. I ignored most of it as it was just trivial drivel; days spent honing my abilities, my superior abilities at that. Flying through the air, the grim form of amusement and soulful peace that gave me was a predominant factor in my younger years; helped shape me. My transformation; the first time and every thereafter. The sparing with mother as she taught me how to dodge, defend and attack in my super form. Now, the tickle of the less dominant state has always impressed me. It was stronger, it was larger, though not as much as my humanoid form; it was agile and quick. I was always there, watching through the eyes, and as I got better control; I could control what needed to be done. By allowing my mind to quiet and allow pure instinct to take over; the thoughts didn't get in the way. Kill, protect, save. It was a transformation of pure emotion, something I used few times. It was a transformation of self-preservation; a last resort of agitation. I had no need for the help of such a reckless, emotion driven state. Kill, protect… Save.

It was ultimately my mother who formally taught me the basics of what I know; what I could accomplish and what I 'couldn't'. I achieved every single thing on her list, plus some she never dreamed I could. She was, in my life, no longer needed; I was her superior, and still am. I surpassed her through pure talent, my weaknesses ten times stronger than her strengths. She was just too sidetracked to see, and when she finally saw me for who I'd become, it was too late. And by that time, I was too proud, too arrogant to see she had more to offer. That was the end of my training.

I remembered many days and nights spent prowling the Western countryside, one demon in mind. I would fight him, and the battle would be one sided, but he would still win. Why wouldn't he fight back? Was his belief in my powers so faint he wouldn't attack me? Was the faith he had in me so dead? Was my mother's training so 'useless' he didn't believe I could win, or was my age the tipping point? I was quite young to have sought him out, but he seemed to expect me to come. No doubt he knew I was nearing his realm before I knew what my intentions were in the first place, but that is of no matter now. It doesn't matter, not really, but here, in this lucid state, everything was more important; every detail, every word, every blade of grass in every memory. He betrayed us, he left us, me, his own kind to take one of those weaker forms; weaker in every aspect. And to mingle my blood with a human. It was disgraceful and the equivalent to spitting on our Daiyokai bloodline. At least, that was what I concluded from my mother's many speeches, rambles. Mother was not fond of humans, of course, she was not really fond of anything. She preferred to tease, to joke, to taunt; no doubt that's why I surpassed her as quickly as I did. Her humor was dark, and her intentions and choices were flawed in many respects and mostly erratic. She would never understand love, and I didn't think I would either, having grown up in her shadow of sarcasm, but, Father. You really left your mark on me that day. You undid a century of teachings and witty remarks, and I do thank you for that. You pushed me off a dark and albeit lonely path; a path I would almost rather have taken some days. But, looking down at the woman in my arms, at the brother across the fire. I'm glad I didn't.

' _Do you have someone to protect.'_

X***X

Time started to meld together. Hours became days and days became weeks. With my new pack, I could not remember the days before this; when it was quiet and it was just me. Those were so long ago, long before I would even think of expanding my group to encompass the beings I currently cared for. No matter; what's done is done. They are mine now.

X*****X

I was nervous to walk next to Sesshomaru, and to be honest a little embarrassed. The last few weeks have been a roller coaster of emotions; denial, anger, sadness, acceptance, and on both sides, not just mine. He seemed content enough with my presence, as though our very relationship hadn't evolved; as though nothing has changed. We are closer than I have ever been with another being, and… And, I feel like I should feel special about it; like I should feel some supernatural way about him, and him me. I don't, and I don't know what to think anymore. Is it the same for him? Is he closer to me than he has ever been with another being? He is, as I've come to know, a lot older than he appears, so it would be silly to think I am his first. But… I don't know. It is the simple questions, the doubts and wonders that ruined many of the relationships back in my own time; these human feelings. I just had to… I had to trust, that what I was feeling was mutual. That this was, in fact, real and meaningful.

' _I trust you Sesshomaru. I trust that you will wait for me; but will you leave me when you get me?'_

X***X

The sun was strong, the air getting hotter as the morning dew evaporated. I took momentary glances at Sesshomaru as we walked, his emotionless mask flawless as ever. I alternated between toying with the cuff of my sleeve and the hem of my skirt as I tried to think of something, anything to say. Before I could, he stopped and raised his arm. I nearly ran into him as he proclaimed, "We will rest here."

Jaken and Inuyasha instantly fanned out, one in search of shade, the other for trouble. I stood like a monument, unsure of what was happening. _'Sesshomaru has never just, stopped walking for the sake of rest. And only a few hours into the day at that.'_

"Is something wrong?"

He turned to me, his eyes a blaze. He stepped one large step towards me, the tips of his shoes flush with mine. He spoke naught; just bore into me with his eyes, his deep, rich, golden eyes.

"Sesshomaru? Sesshomaru..."

"Why have you not spoken? It is… Unlike you. Did I do something to offend?"

I dropped my mouth open, my face crinkling with hurt. _'He's been suffering this whole time?'_

"No, no Sesshomaru. I didn't…" I sighed, nervous. "I wasn't sure, what to say. I thought you were mad when we stopped… You know, because I was not… Am not ready." I cursed as my face started to flush an apple, rose color.

"I told you Kagome. I will wait for you. You could not possibly anger me by choosing not to do something you aren't ready for. Humans are a lot more complicated in how they think than demons. I have learned that through Inuyasha, and the many, many human villages we have passed by. You are whimsy, stubborn and easily frightened creatures. Humans. I will never understand them, but, I want to understand you. "

I stepped forward and embraced him hard, a small huff escaping his lips as the air rushed out of his lungs. "I'm sorry. I am scared, that's all. I don't… I'm just. I don't want to get hurt."

"Hurt. I would never hurt you, Kagome, I will protect you." He looked at me genuinely. He has never experienced anguish? Pain of the chest, heart? Of course he hasn't, he does the heartbreaking.

"No. You can't protect someone from this hurt, Sesshomaru. Heartbreak."

X*****X

 **Did I tease anyone with that beginning or what? I'm just uncomfortable writing a deeper love scene right now, and to force it would make it awkward, especially in their current relationship standing (They're not ready!)... I enjoyed giving tiny tidbits of Sesshomaru's past. I also want to create more in later Chapters so we can all have a glimpse into Sesshomaru's past; how I imagine he lived. Also, note that nowhere in the show does it say his father has a castle or lands or riches so I am introducing the idea of him growing up like other demons would. In all the stories I read he is always rich, a jerk, a noble and powerful (Obviously) and irresistible. So I want to try a new idea in a few of those aspects.**

 **I also feel like this should end soon. I don't want to run it on. It feels like one of those stories that loses interest but I don't know how or if I can just stop it. I don't like abandoning things I've worked so hard on. I can't say for sure because it's my writing. I will always judge it more harshly, or not harshly enough so I'm probably just being dramatic. Ciao Ciao all!** _ ***Dramatic hand flair as I leave the room***_


	26. part 26

Part 26

X****X

Tell me.  
How you can be the brighter star  
that lights up the sky?  
I can't seem  
to even light up my own way,  
and, I've burned out from trying.

I can't see  
that I'm not digging my way out.  
I'm digging my grave.

X****X

I gazed impassively at myself in the waters steaming surface. My face was less cheeky; more worn and tapered by the many days spent traveling. Though my clothes seemed to mask it, I gained a thin layer of toned muscle which ran the length of my body and back up again. The lack of travel between my world and the feudal era has left me with a completely new set of skills and experiences; not to mention a new found respect for my bike and heavy bag of supplies.

I flicked my shoes off and peeled my socks from my sore and blistered feet. I dropped the garments to the ground as I began stripping from the rest of my mostly clean clothes. I stood nude before the water's edge, my hands gripping my uniform blouse tightly. The slowly falling sun bathed me in its dying rays as I fingered a small tear in the side of the shirt. I stared sadly at my own reflection in the water, watching the liquid bounce and boil with the suns reflections. ' _Everything's changing._ ' Sighing, I folded the shirt carefully, making sure the melted portion of my sleeve was hidden beneath the rest of the good fabric. I stepped into the bubbling spring, lowering myself deeper and deeper into the water.

' _Inuyasha. Sango. Miroku. Shippo… Mom. Souta. Gramps.'_ I sighed again as I hugged my knees to my chest. _'What am I doing? Why am I here? Are my friends, my family in another dimension worrying about me? Are they even born yet? Does that dimension even exist? Is it just this future? Does my future exist? Everyone I've met, everything I've seen, done, the world I knew. Does_ _ **it**_ _exist? I tried to forget it. To accept that this is how things will be, are going to be, but, I can't. I just can't!'_

I closed my eyes, the emotions I've struggled to hide finding their way to the surface. I took long deep breaths as a small tear fell from my thick lashes. Images of my friends passed through my mind; of the people that have come to depend on me; and me them. Images of the allies we had conscripted, the months of travels, of emotions and relationships we worked so hard to build and solidify. I thought of everything I had left behind, my friends, our journey; my life. I thought of my weakness in flesh and mind; my inability to stop Naraku, to procure my once heartbreaking love. I thought of my new surroundings, new everything; even this new interest; Sesshomaru.

Another tear fell. "But it was all for nothing. I see nothing anymore. I know nothing. For once, I don't know where to go. What to do. I have always been sure of my choices, knowing I've done my best; that I have the support behind me. But now? Now, I don't know anymore. Inuyasha has always been there to show me the way, to help me along. He has always been there, but he is a child here. He doesn't know me, what we've been through together. My friends have been there to help me too and now they're…"

I shook as I held back a sob, my voice cracking. I looked to the sky and held my breath until my shaking subsided, unwilling to chance Sesshomaru overhearing my breakdown. With tears still streaming down my cheeks I pushed off the rocks and ducked under the surface; the water barrier the only thing separating me from the living. ' _Forget it. You are stuck here. Forever.'_

 _._

I held my breath longer and longer as I forced myself to remain under, my lungs slowly starting to claw at my ribs; frantic. I thought of my friends, my family as my chest burst. I thought of my role in our adventure, of my place in their group. I am no longer useful. I am a book without the words. Finally, I thought of Sesshomaru; of us, what we could have been. Peace blossomed in my chest as my vision flickered, but something inside me told me to move; to escape this danger, to not give up; give in. ' _Inuyasha.'_

The pain was unbearable as I surfaced, my lungs grasping desperately at the cool oxygen. My eyes flashed black as the sudden rush of life entered my deprived body, my chest heaving as I took in as much air as I could. I closed my eyes as one final tear fell into the spring, its bitter salty end left to mix with the pure natural water. _'I will make it home one day. I promise it. Inuyasha… My friend.'_

X***X

My soak in the spring purged me of my sorrows; but only for a moment. As I stood in the clearing with the rising steam, my hopelessness; the awful toxins of my depression was expelled from my soul. I forced myself to take it one step at a time; ring out my hair, put my undergarments on; followed by my skirt and shoes. I grabbed my shirt last, sniffing as I unfolded the marred fabric. I stared at the garment; the thousands of minutes I had spent in it, covered in dirt and gore and sweat. I wasn't mad then; when the fabric was red with blood or scorched with flame. The things it has seen with me; the people I had loved holding me in it. And not once had it gotten this beat up. Running for my life, laughing and playing, crying and miserable, solemn and surreal. It has never been anything but pristine; anything other than what I know it was.

I found the ball of hate that I held so tightly in my chest, hidden from the outside world; undetectable to anyone but myself. The anger, the betrayal, the sadness and the pain. And, I took it out on the shirt. I screamed as I tore the fabric from seam to seam; the melted sleeve the hardest part to rip through.

"It is not supposed to be this way! You have never failed me, not once! But now, when I need you the most you tear! You leave me alone without anything that I know!"

I moaned into the torn shirt. "I've become what I despise, bitter, full of anger and hate with nowhere to go, to direct it! There has to be another way. There has to be something I overlooked; a way out!"

I threw the broken shirt to the ground. "No, I just want to break free from this nightmare. There is no way out. There is no way out! I don't belong here. I don't… I don't fucking belong here!"

I screamed one final time as I fell to my knees, clutching my arms around my midsection. I allowed my tears to puddle on the damp rocks. I allowed my cries to be heard by anyone close enough to listen. I paid no mind to the way I cried, whether or not I looked ugly or the mucus dripped from my chin. "Everything is different. I can't accept that this is my life. I am not supposed to be here; here in this nightmare. Naraku. What the hell did you do to me? This is evil, even by your standards."

The cold embrace of my memories was the only comfort I received in my soulful, eternal fight.

X*****X

I stood still in the small clearing, my concentration lazily focused on my half-brother before me. His demands for me to train him have steadily grown stronger as the days passed, and I finally obliged. Having his own defense would ensure that, even when I'm not around, he will be safe.

Our stand-off lasted only moments as he lunged at me with a fearsome roar. I dodged him easily, hitting him onto the ground with a sweep of my arm.

"Inuyasha. You must try harder. Blindly attacking is a foolish offense. Think."

"Feh. Can't you teach me something you know? Like that cool whip or your poison claws? I don't have anything like that, just my own regular claws."

He thrust his hands into his sleeves and turned away. He curled his legs, crossing them as he appeared to pout in the middle of our lesson.

"Inuyasha. Get up. I can't teach you those things. As for your own move, you will have to figure that out. I can teach you offensive and defensive moves. That is all."

"Because I'm not a full demon? I'm a half breed. I know I know. It's always the same answer with everyone."

My look of indifference dropped. "Do not. Say that."

He looked at me, his own frown disappearing. I glared at him, "I will not train someone who does not respect their own powers. You may be a hanyo, but you have more strength than most youkai will ever know. Now get up and try again."

"Hai, brother."

X***X

' _He has gotten better.'_

He eyed me up, his hands twitching in anticipation. I launched at him, my whip swirling around my figure with the wind of my demonic aura. He dodged each crack of the whip, unaware that I had reduced my speed and ferocity so he could keep up; learn. He smiled an evil smile as he attacked me back. And so our lesson continued.

A shift in the wind brought aromas anew towards our sparing field. He scented the air, his eyes flickering off me with every current. "Focus on me. Trust your nose and ears to alert you to your surroundings." I launched towards him, my claws outstretched. "Distractions kill."

A loud, angry scream reverberated through the trees and into our match. I whipped my head instantly towards the sound, my clawed hand falling as I came to a standstill. My mistake. Inuyasha pounced on me, his breath coming in short pants as he took me to the ground, his hand held victoriously over my throat. "Distractions kill."

I raised an eyebrow, "Well done, using the interruption to overpower a tougher opponent." He stepped off me as I stood back up, brushing the grass from my hair.

"You should take your own advice brother Sesshomaru." He gave me a goofy grin as he bowed his head ever so slightly.

I growled playfully, my attention already on Kagome.

"Get Jaken." I dismissed him with a twitch of my wrist as I walked off after the sound.

' _Kagome, what did you do.'_

X***X

She sat on the ground beside the hot springs, strips of cloth strewn about her hunched figure. Her voice took on a haunted tone as she murmured, each word sticking in my memory like a hot iron. Her cries started again and rang steadily as her torments dripped from her cheeks, their salty scent filling the warm air. I felt a small stinging in my cheeks and a burning in my chest as I gazed upon her exposed back, a small strip of cloth the only thing binding her chest from my view. Her skirt covered next to nothing as she rocked back and forth, her cries filling my ears. I looked away as I approached her, my cheeks still warm as I crouched beside her. I said nothing as I stooped, letting her cry until she would look at me; until she would respond to me. It didn't take long.

She tipped over onto me, her palms running over her red eyes in a lame attempt to stifle the tears. I stayed crouched beside her, scenting the air for anyone she may have mentioned. It was clean.

I shifted as I pulled her a little closer, no longer noticing her inappropriate dress. "Kagome, what happened?" I murmured, my voice lower than it's ever been.

She only shook her head, burying her face in her hands. I looked up and suppressed a sigh. ' _Emotions...'_

I picked at the cloth that was once her shirt, dropping the soiled and useless scrap to the ground. _'She did quite a bit of damage. She will need new clothes.'_

I gauged the height of the sun against the horizon, determining that there was still a few hours of daylight left; enough to pay the human village a visit. With a fluid motion, I scooped Kagome up and started walking, already aware of Inuyasha and Jaken following my scent trail.

X**X

Our walk was quiet, a blessed detour from my now normal days. No loud stomping feet behind me, no whines and sighs beside me; only the sky, the grass and the wind…

"Lord Sesshomaru! Wait for us!"

I glanced down at Kagome, ignoring Jaken screaming behind me; just us and the wind…

Her face was down turned, a scowl placed over her usual demure expression. Not even embarrassment was seen in her.

I was concerned she spoke naught, but didn't particularly care. This seemed to be another side effect of the human condition. Their madly short lives leave them open to higher levels of emotion; a higher spectrum. While I could take a hundred years to mull over one feeling, but they must learn several in just a few. To manage it all in so little time. Another disadvantage to the association with humans. _'However, I like this fast pace. It intrigues me.'_

"You know I can walk by myself. I didn't ask for help." Her voice was watery, like a raindrop in my ocean of thought.

"Hn." I looked back to the trail, my previous thoughts being stored for later examination. _'But you need it.'_

X*****X

I allowed him to carry me. I wasn't in the mood to argue anyway, and I didn't have the desire to move by my own will. My tears have long since dried up, and now I was stewing in the aftermath of my breakdown; the anger. My eyes were sore from the tears and my chest was burning after trying to hold back the flood. But, I was at peace here, in Sesshomaru's arms. I was exposed physically, mentally, but I don't care anymore. I can't. I crossed my arms over my abdomen, the puckered skin on my left arm taunting me; reminding me that I was still weak; that I still needed protection. ' _I forgot about this. There's been no pain since it happened. The feeling was next to nothing, but it's returning.'_

I rubbed my thumb over the heat scars. They traveled the length of my arm, from my shoulder to the base of my thumb. Some areas were worse than others; small broken blisters and red skin to permanent damage; no chance of my pearly white skin returning. _'My blouse did this. The melted fabric did this. And that woman. Even now, change is forced upon me. My luck has run out. It was too good to be true.'_

 _X***X_

Sesshomaru hasn't spoken since back at the springs. He seemed more distracted and his face was more void of emotion than normal, like he was really empty and not just hiding. _'He must be waiting for me. He is always waiting for me.'_

I swallowed thickly. "I'm sorry about before. I can walk now." I pushed at his chest gently, insisting on being less of a burden to him.

His grip on me tightened as he growled his displeasure. "Your arm. Why didn't you tell me it was so bad?"

I covered the disturbed skin with my other arm, only wishing I could absorb it back into my body. "It's nothing. Nothing compared to the other wounds inflicted that day. I took care of it myself. We weren't on the best of terms then anyway, remember? Besides, it doesn't hurt. Not anymore."

He only blinked. "You can't walk."

I frowned, but he cut me off before I could respond. "You are not descent. I do not want people looking."

"Oh, so is this Sesshomaru being chivalrous or zealous?"

His eye sparkled with amusement, sensing the change in my attitude. "No such thing."

He stopped suddenly, his face downcast as he focused intently on me. Our conversation took a turn as he all but begged for an explanation. "What happened at the spring?"

My smile dropped but I felt compelled to answer him. "I… I'm tired. I'm lost. I'm not supposed to be here. This isn't how things were supposed to go. I don't belong here. I need to get back home."

"Then where do you belong? Where is home?"

His tone never changed as he asked the odd question, even as my story became more and more whimsical. Whether or not he believed me, I could not tell.

"It doesn't even matter if you don't believe me. It's just nice to talk to someone about it. I don't understand what happened to me. I don't understand why I am so far in the feudal era. Where I come from, Inuyasha… He..."

I felt him tense, "What of him?"

"Well, he is not a child. Where I come from, there is not so much peace in the land. Where I come from, a half demon called Naraku threatens to destroy us all… He is how I got here. And Inuyasha, he looks my age. You look the same."

"I'm there too?"

If my story confused him in any way, he did not show it. "Yes. But. You aren't the same, as you are now. You aren't like this, caring for your brother and me, you are… I mean. You and Inuyasha aren't…"

"I am a monster." His voice held a certain hardness to it; something that was directed not at me, but himself. "I fight him? I try to kill him? How could that be possible? That cannot be, my destiny."

"I'm sorry. Sesshomaru. But, it's not too late." I whispered to him.

He looked torn. "Fate can be tempted. It can't be changed."

X*****X

We crested a small hill, beholding a small perfectly set village with a sunset background. The fields were slowly emptying as the weary villagers scurried to their homes; to their wives and families, anywhere to avoid the falling darkness.

I cleared the streets with my presence, sending young children scurrying into the arms of awaiting parents, praying to be unharmed.

' _If Kagome's story hold truth. I can't change Inuyasha's future or mine. I can't save him from the hurt half demons face. I will cause it.'_

We adjusted course as necessary, following the strong scent of healing towards the priestess of the village. Her hut was adorned with dried herbs and plants hanging from every surface available. The scent of healing was strong, but I didn't show my irritation with the pungent smell. I stood Kagome on her feet as the older priestess exited her home. I felt Inuyasha take refuge behind my leg; human villages didn't treat him well, and I refused to allow him harm.

"A demon and a priestess traveling together? And a half demon to boot. My, oh my, never thought I would see such a sight. A family is not very common." Her speech was simple, giving her a slightly dim appearance, but I knew better. An unwise priestess doesn't make it to this human's age.

"Clothes, we require Clothes." I made my voice hard; stern and altogether unpleasant as I nodded to my traveling companion. Kagome's premonition of my future didn't sit well with me, and I needed silence to mull it over.

She cocked her head to the side, slowly walking towards her dried up herbs. She fiddled with them, "My instincts tells me you mean no harm. I will see what I have in the back."

I growled, irritated by her lack of fear. She glanced from me to Kagome, sighing.

"Come, come child. No use standing out in the dark dressed like that. And bring ye little friends. A warm meal might just perk them up."

I approved as the priestess held open the entrance to her hut, the warm home swallowing my pack. Jaken's voice screeched his disapproval as being referred to as "little" but he otherwise followed.

I watched sharply as they disappeared into the hut, my eyes burning into the woman before turning and heading towards the forest.

"If they are harmed. This village will suffer."

She bowed her head before retreating into the shack. "I would have it no other way."

X*****X

 **Lyrics borrowed from Like a Storm's "Break Free."**

 **I am sooo skeptical of this chapter. I will try to make the next one much better. I think the idea I have is solid, but the way I introduced it was… I don't know. Hope it made sense and was enjoyable.**

 **My motive for this chapter was to introduce to Sesshomaru the idea of Kagome being a time traveler and to show that Kagome is human. She holds as much doubt and fear and anger as the rest of us. She may react and respond with her purity, but we are all the same inside. I wanted to show that she has been strong for far too long, and that one rip in her blouse pushed her over the edge. This is the first chance she has really had since she was sent away from everything she knew to reflect on her situation. To come to terms with it. She is a fragile mind, shown by her little bit of a psychotic outburst. And, I don't blame her. We all have our breaking point, and hers, was that simple rip in a shirt.**

 **Also, please forgive. I went back and realize that a lot of things that happened, have been forgotten about. I am trying to readdress them so they are not a bunch of loose ends. I want to tie them up pretty like.**


	27. part 27

Part 27

I stood calm and composed in my circle of demon parts; twitching and contracting limbs still falling from the sky. The forest was alive with demon here and their need to prove their strength was wasted on me. I was stronger, faster and smarter. I slaughtered them all, and yet, still they flocked to me; flies in honey.

I dispatched yet another wave; their grim war cries as they attacked me without strategy alerting me to their position every time, not to mention their pungent odour. I moved sluggishly, my hand whipping out to the side, to the sky and all around me to clean slice every opponent with one lazy gesture. I flicked the grime off my hands as I landed in the clearing, tiring of this unchallenging game. I contemplated using my Tetsuiga to revive them all only to slaughter them once more but thought better of it. This mass slaughter was only a distraction from my current goal and irritated me more. ' _I don't understand.'_

I ignored masses of demons as watched me, aroused by the scent of blood and battle. They investigated the corpses of their kin, their simple minds accurately understanding that which their fellow demon kind did not. I would not die; will not die. I scented the air before I turned and walked away from the demons and further away from the village; the air here was too stifling.

X*****X

The old priestess sauntered into the hut, almost limping as she perched herself on a small mat, indicating me to do the same. She stared at me, her eyes betraying nothing as she seemed to drink us in. Jaken sat casually with his staff tucked behind his crossed arms while Inuyasha bothered every object in the home he could reach; from the pot hanging over the cold fire to the herbs drying on several strands of twine. I hissed at him to stop but he simply flicked an ear, expelling my voice from his mind. His ears were turned off to me.

"Nay child it's alright. Let him sate his curiosity, its fine."

"Alright. Just don't break anything. Inuyasha? You hear me Inuyasha?" He didn't hear me. He stepped over a pot to grab at a stick of sweet smelling herbs. He knocked the plain vase over, cracking it as he tasted the plant, stuffing it into his mouth before we could so much as take a breath. I have learned a lot from Kiadea, but whether or not those were poisonous was unknown to me.

"Oh my god! Are those safe for half demons? What is it?" I screeched and stood up, ready to rip the grasses out of his mouth, forgetting completely about my lack of upper body clothing.

"Calm down, those are nothing harmful, just tempting. Their taste is nothing compared to the smell. He will find out the hard way, as many curious little ones have."

As if on cue, he proceeded to spit the wad of chewed vegetation out of his mouth, echoing the hut with his cries of disgust. He kicked the already cracked vase in an attempt to take hold of an offered container, downing the liquid inside quickly as he could between his exasperations of repulsion. "Gross!"

The vase gave one final shudder before it broke to several large pieces. I smiled stiffly, sitting myself back down on my mat. Jaken berated Inuyasha for his stupid behaviour as I covered up my chest once again. I sighed, my shoulders dropping and my head tilting to the side in defeat. "This first impression has not gone well. We really are more charming than this."

For the first time, a smile broke her face, amusement flaring up in her eyes. "Ah yes. Well this is a better impression than that husband of yours left. A lot less, threatening."

I raised my head quickly as my cheeks dusted red, "Not, my husband." I couldn't stress the 'not' enough.

"Oh, did I offend? As I recall, mate, is the term such Youkai use, is it not? Human terms must not sit well with one of such stature. I can tell just by the aura he presents. He is very powerful." Her looks became thoughtful, like she was sifting through her many years of memories for this one scrap of knowledge.

My face reddened more, "No, not mates either. Just friends. Inuyasha isn't ours. He is Sesshomaru's half-brother."

She frowned, leaning back. "You. You are an interesting child, living with the company you do. Odd enough a full blooded demon would accept a Hanyo, let alone travel with one. But you? A full blooded human, and just as friends at that. Strange indeed."

I smiled, fully aware of how uncommon our arrangement really is. _'But not as strange as you would think.'_

X***X

Night fell upon the village quickly and Sesshomaru was still nowhere in sight. I sighed, my eyes drooping. _'I refuse to sleep without you here.'_

I glanced around the hut, Priestess Rukia, our gracious host, was soundly asleep. Jaken sat perched next to the door frame, his staff clattered to the floor next to him hours ago. I tried to keep my mind busy; keep myself awake. I spent most of my time trying to sense Sesshomaru. Sense his distinct Youkai. His scent. His sound, his energy. Nothing.

I patted Inuyasha's head, his soft snores not helping my resolve to stay awake. I found comfort in my new robes, the red and white fabric softer than cloud in my expended state. If Jaken could sleep here, what danger was there? He was, after all a full demon. He could sense danger correct? Did I have to forgo sleep here? I dropped my guard as the swaddled effect of my new clothing pulled me into the realm between worlds where I could dream. The security of it; of this place was like my armor.

But, not all armor is bulletproof.

X**X

In my darkness of sleep I heard him; them. Calling to me, crying for me. Needing me. _'Inuyasha? Sango? Guys, I'm here. Don't cry, I'm here!'_

Their voices rose and fell in a sorrow filled song. I could hear their words, but I couldn't register them in my mind. I couldn't figure out what they were saying. _'Don't cry guys, I'm coming!'_

More voices joined in. Voices I recognized and some I didn't. Koga, Shippo, even Kikyo. They all added their sorrows into the song, the melody growing and growing. The bass of the song grew in intensity, and my eyes pricked with unshed tears as a haunting howl chimed in; a sound so sad it could shatter my very soul. My body went hot and my heart beat sped up rapidly. I opened my mouth to speak, to try to consol the castor of the voice but could not. The creature sang of loss; howled and whined for heartbreak; for sadness and confusion. It was the only words of the haunting song that I understood; whispered just for me to hear.

"I will wait for you Kagome."

X***X

I opened my eyes slowly; blinked, and shut them. Try again. I opened my eyes again, this time managing to keep them that way. I looked up into the sky, the dark night sky. _'What?'_

I glanced around, noting the fire that glowed deathly pale against the creeping black of the dark. It was the faces illuminated by the coals that sparked my attention. "Sango?"

She didn't move, her body propped up against Miroku; Kirara and Shippo held fast against their slowly rising and falling chests. Kikyo laid picture perfect on the ground alongside the fire, her own chest rhythmically synced to Sango and Miroku. Koga was hunched opposite of me, his serene face touched with worry as his dreams took him. "Koga too?"

I sat up with ease, the grass light and feathery under hand. "Inuyasha?"

"Kagome?" He fell from the trees and landed lightly. "Is it you? Really?"

My eyes filled. "Inuyasha!"

I ran to him, my bare feet hardly touching the grass beneath me. Our embrace was warm. "I was so worried! So scared. I missed you so much. The real you."

"Kagome. Where are you? Why did you leave me?" His face was hidden beneath his bangs, his eyes covered. "Come back."

I tilted his chin up, forcing him to meet my gaze. Several tears fell from his golden eyes. "I'm right here Inuyasha. I won't leave you. I'm here."

His eyes dropped, our hug turning cold; animated. "No. I need you but... He does too. He's waiting for you." He whispered, his tears drying on his cheeks. "But you have to come back Kagome. Please come back to us. We need you too."

"Inuyasha what... I'm right here. Right here." My voice caught in my throat. _'What are you talking about?'_

"Good bye Kagome." It was the sad sound of someone about to cry as he bid me farewell, his eyes shining and his mouth quivering. He started to fade away. Sango, Miroku, the others. All disappearing into nothing as I was left behind. "But. I'm here."

In a flash of white the clearing was gone, the trees, the fire; the sky.

"Don't leave me!" I screamed into the nothing, and then it went black.

I opened my eyes slowly; blinked once, twice. I looked up, disappointed at what I stared at. A roof. A hut. A golden ray of sun dripping onto Inuyasha's face in my arms. Not my Inuyasha. _'But... I'm right here.'_

X***X

With little to no hope of predicting when Sesshomaru would return, we were prepared to stay in the village. I pushed my odd dream out of my mind as I worked with Rukia to continue my training. She was eager to have a pupil skilled as I was. As of yet, there were no ladies showing promise in the village.

I quickly learned new names for herbs and new remedies for wounds. We toiled in the dirt, our conversations drifting in and out. But mostly, it was quiet.

The villagers gave us looks of disgust, gossiping and groaning throughout the community. Several approached their Priestess with hope of ejecting us from the village, others came to question her sanity. There were even those who were so betrayed they claimed she was possessed and rallied a mob for a takeover, eager to find a monk powerful enough to perform an exorcism on Rukia. They were easily disbanded and sent away with four parting words. "You will be sorry."

Priestess Rukia warned every villager that held a rock, lifted a farm tool and spat out an insult. "Leave this family alone. Should any harm come to them you will be sorry. We will **all** be sorry."

In fact Sesshomaru's name slowly became enough to break them up. Whenever they would forget the warning she would slip his name and they would stop, they would fear. And so my village life continued through the day and well into the night.

Once again I found myself crushed by Inuyasha, his sleep riddled mind unable to escape his demon senses. He was mumbling. Mumbling a warning.

"Blood."

X*****X

I looked back at the miles I had covered; at the land stretched out before me, enticing me to follow the many wondrous scents drifting through the tree boughs. The wind, once my ally, brought forth stronger scents from the village I was fleeing. _'How can I think when even now she assaults me?'_

I took a long and deep inhale, filling my whole being with her scent before criticizing myself for needing her so. I took another moment to find peace in the dying darkness before the day would bring noise, noise, noise. I looked down from the miniaturized mountain I stood atop, scenting the air and taking in all directions at once with my honed senses. Nothing seemed to be amiss in the lands. There were no odd scents or sounds; not even the trees stirred with displeasure.

' _What evil was she talking about? Kagome? Was she lying to me? But what use would concocting this lie do for her? Surely something strong as she claims must exist now if it is going to exist in my future. Nothing is born with a superior ability to the Inu yokai. Nothing. Even I had to learn this strength I now wield, and am still growing stronger with it every day. I will find this, Naraku, and I will destroy him before he rises to power; before he causes Inuyasha so much more pain than even I will.'_

I was prepared to take off, to vault up and burn across the sky in search of my prey, but a faint scent caught my attention. It was strong enough to send a tingle of pleasure through me. Blood. But, I know that blood. My eyes flickered red as my instincts to protect what is mine took over. I whipped my body around towards the village and launched off in pursuit of the smell. I shattered the rock with the strength of my take off. I was at the foot of the village in moments, my fangs bared and my claws tense. I scented again. It was stronger now. Not pure blood, but it was still her blood; just hers. Kagome. I sped through the village to the hut she was staying in. Nothing seemed amiss, but I will trust what I see.

I gripped the door with such intensity the wood creaked and splintered in my grasp. I forced my way into the hut, spilling the soft morning light across the worn wooden floor. I growled low and deep, my instincts drinking in all I could; what I saw, smelled, heard and felt. Jaken was the first to notice my shadow reaching into the darkness of the warm hut.

X*****X

 **Well how's about that? I don't think this chapter was fluffy much. MUCH! I found it to have some interesting points. Sesshomaru's reaction to his future; a monster as he called himself earlier. How he just, leaves! His determination to change the future and how he reacts to how he *will* treat Inuyasha. Silly guy. Even he said Fate can be tempted, not changed. He can't change the future! And Kagome having dreams of her friends! Are they really dreams! Or are they more? I don't know yet. Maybe she is just going crazy. But… Maybe not! She is still desperate to get back to future past, but how does this 'Sesshomaru love' play into things! How many more chapters can I go! OH! I feel like I have too many plans for this story. Time to do some narrowing! Hope this was enjoyed. My last chapter, ahaha, lost me some people.**

 **X***X**

 **Who am I? I am the pebble in your shoe.**

 **X***X**


	28. part 28

Part 28

"Lord Sesshomaru!" Jaken's voice was loud, no bar held back as he called my name. Inuyasha bolted upright and looked at me with fearful eyes, his deep sleep interrupted in the most irritating manor. His expression softened as he recognized me and he laid back down.

I ignored his pleading looks for affection, glancing around the room. My stare stopped on the old Priestess for a moment before I continued my scrutiny. Only when every detail was etched into my memory did I acknowledge him. I inhaled just enough to trace Kagome; her scent was all over Inuyasha.

"Jaken. Kagome?"

"Ah, umm, she…" He stuttered with confusion. "Is something wrong Milord?"

"She left a few moments ago." The priestess spoke with her eyes closed, her hand mechanically stirring a pot of what I assumed to be stew. "She will be back soon; tis her wish to be alone. Sit. Wait."

I growled at her familiarity with me; at the tones with which she attempted to command me. I yield to no one.

Their lack of concern for Kagome should have been my first clue that nothing was wrong, but, I will only believe what I see. What I smell and hear and feel. I didn't see her or hear her. And what I smell, means Kagome is not okay. "My warning still stands, Miko."

I spared no seconds, not allowing her to respond before I turned. I escaped the hut with a flurry of my fur, etching my claws deep into the wood, marking the hut. A threat. I can destroy this village.

I prowled after Kagome's scent, every fiber of my being dedicated to finding her. Protecting her. The blood scent grew stronger the further I got from the hut and I increased my guard. I followed it past the gardens of freshly tilled dirt. Past the fences of penned animals and out into the forest. The scent was drunk, weaving around trees and pulling off a main trail in several places. I saw no signs of struggles nor smelled any other scents other than my troublesome Miko. No blood tracks. Then, I found her. Kagome.

I flicked my eyes up and down her figure, inspecting for traces of injuries I told myself. I felt my chest warm before I coiled the feeling back deep inside me. Had I gotten there any sooner, I would have found her in less than her Miko garb. She was ringing her hair out, tying it back with a white strip of cloth.

"Kagome."

She didn't jump, only turned so softly I froze for a moment. The sun reflected off her freshly washed hair and her robes accented her skin beautifully, making her glow. She stood up from her crouched position, her smile growing as she saw me. I was acutely aware of every shape her lips took when pronouncing my name, sending a tingle through my system. "Sesshomaru."

I swallowed thickly, my composure wavering as she stepped closer and closer. I shook my head and closed the gap with two large steps.

"What are you doing here? I didn't think you would come back. You left so… Suddenly. I was worried."

' _She was worried?_ ' I allowed a murmur of humour crawl through me. As though I could leave them. "I smell blood. Your blood. Explain."

She stared at me like I had just slapped her in the face. "What do you mean…?"

I sighed. Normally this coy attitude was tolerable but, this was no time to play games. I gave her a flat stare. She has wasted enough of my time if I was going to search for this Naraku.

She flicked her eyes away from me, attempting to flee but I grabbed her hand and pulled her back. "It's none of your business!" She snapped at me. I could feel her aura flare, feel the heat of her temper, and something else. Her sudden hostility peaked my interest.

"If you are injured it is my business. I am to protect you."

"Well you weren't here! Besides, it's not an injury, Sesshomaru. It's… Something else. Okay? Just leave it at that." Her face turned a deep shade of crimson and I felt mine change as well. How could I be so stupid?

' _Oh.'_

I was old, by human standards, but young in comparison to my kind. I knew now what I was smelling and why I was so eager to find her. She was after all a female, and I am a male, even if we are of different species. I can't believe I was so naïve as to not recognize it before, or to even be aware of her mating cycle. This is the end of her cycle. I felt regret course through my veins like fire searing through ice. My instincts told me I was too late; that I should have mated when I had the chance but my head told me that was not the case. Kagome comes first. I was supposed to wait for her. Still, the implications of the cycle were made clear. She would soon be ready, and how could I resist her now?

X*****X

I watched his face change. I embarrassed him. I actually embarrassed him? I turned away, mortified. He knows. He knows, he knows and worse. He can smell it. This is horrible. I felt the urge to cry build up in my chest.

"Your mating cycle." His voice was deep and rich. A voice I could listen to for nights on end. It caused a shiver to run down my spine.

"You would call it that wouldn't you. Just drop it!" I replaced my mortification with irritation. To be mad is to be stronger. I will not cry. I will not be embarrassed. What gives him the right to smell me anyway?

"Kagome I'm…"

I took a deep breath, my heart skipping several beats. Shit. I felt the warm tears build up under my closed eyelids. I yelled at him, cutting him off with my thick voice. "I said leave it alone! This happens! This is what it is to be a woman! I can't help it!"

I felt a pressure from behind. Two strong arms wrapped around me, a curtain of silver hair falling precariously slow around me, blocking the forest from my view. He leaned down and whispered into my ear, his breath warm and his words slow. "Death and rebirth. Your cycle will begin anew. Knowing your scent, will only make it harder, for me to let you be unmarked."

I felt my heart skip and my core warm at the insinuations in his words. I didn't know his senses were powerful enough to pick up on hormones. I said nothing as he released me and started back towards the hut, his long hair trailing magically behind him. Every strand was illuminated by the gold soaked rays of the sun and his strength and purpose with each stride pulled me after him. I felt my heart tear into more tiny pieces as I my heart fought with my head. Here or home.

Here?

Or Home?

X*****X

Her scent was distracting, both for Inuyasha and me. His ears flexed and I could see his nose working, trying to examine the scent; her scent. I growled at him, reminding him of my position in our group and he ceased his investigation; backing off from Kagome. She seemed not to notice, and if she did, said nothing.

Jaken's obliviousness, or was it simply disinterest, to Kagome's state made our travels easier. Our conversations started out casual and forced, slowly taking on deeper meaning. Our discussion took a darker turn when we revisited her origins and predictions for Inuyasha and my future. Something she claims to see. Her voice was steady and strong as she explained everything in better detail; answering a few of my questions here and there.

Naraku has not yet been born. I could not possible find him and so the past few days I've spent searching have been futile. How silly of me to not follow up on her claims; to just act like some misinformed youth, determined to quell a war before it took place. How naive to believe I could accomplish such a feat. How egotistical. And without even knowing his scent I could not prevent his birth; I could not change this future. I sighed. Of course I can't. The future can't be changed. She will just watch it fold out before her like a tale passed down amongst generations. Only she has the knowledge to help me destroy him, and it is useless.

' _If I will destroy his future, he may as well be prepared for it.'_

"Inuyasha, come. We will be back."

I ignored Jaken's sputters and indignant howls of irritation at being left behind again and turned to the thicket, my baby brother in tow. If he will be on his own for all those years as Kagome predicts, I will brand some skills into that brain of his. Today, we will hunt.

X***X

I felt my chest swell. Was this pride? I stood in a clearing surrounded by nothing but the trees and an over hyper hanyo. He clutched his prey in his hands and crowed with joy, his little fangs displayed in a large grin across his face. The terrified rodent twisted and flipped in his grip, anything to break free but like a true predator, Inuyasha didn't let go.

"I got him! I got him Sesshomaru! Can I let it go now?" His voice was dying, his initial excitement over.

"No. Kill it."

His face dropped. I could tell he has never done something like this before. "Inuyasha. What do you think it is that I bring back for you and Kagome to eat?"

"But. Why do I have to kill him? Can't you do it?"

"No. Use your claws, like I showed you. It will be quick." I could see him hesitate. "Inuyasha. It is the way of the world. The strong prey on the weak. Take pride in this fact and accept it."

He flexed his claws, the bones in his fingers cracking. He closed his eyes and with a quick slash, the creature fell still. I could see the emotions play across his face.

"Inuyasha." I forced him to look at me.

"I'm fine. What's next?"

I continued the lesson, his human blood bowing to the demon inside. His natural predisposition to hunting became more dominant and he excelled, extracting the meat from the carcass with a finesse worthy of even the most skilled hunter.

He carried his prize back with him to where Kagome and Jaken waited. The field was large and open, flowers of every color and size blooming and releasing their intoxicating aromas. Kagome and Jaken sat back to back, their voices lost to the flowers as they shared few words in the dying light. I stood back and watched as Inuyasha raced to them, already bragging about his kill. Kagome praised him, taking the meat and wrapping it in a cloth for later. She dropped a wreath of flowers over Inuyasha's head as he flopped into the blossoms beside her. How could she be so unhappy here? She looks so content, yet I can still sense her yearning for something. Something that we couldn't give her. I tried to forget it for now. I had a feeling that we would be faced with that turmoil sooner or later. A choice would have to be made. A choice that will hurt Kagome more than it could ever hurt me.

X*****X

 **Don't hate me. I am writing the rest of the story before I upload more because, well. I don't really know. I keep going back in chapters and changing things (I have a few already done ;)**

 **I will upload this one because I haven't touched it in days, and I don't want people to think I forgot. I am working on this almost every day. Hope you like it, and we are getting to the nitty gritty. Soon, soonish. Maybe, we will be done. I'll give you a few chapters warning though.**


	29. part 29

Part 29

Sesshomaru's attention was lavished over Inuyasha; every spare moment, every chance to teach him something. I could see the love he held, covered and hidden away, but still there. He took Inuyasha on many trips into the forest, leaving Jaken and I alone. With the distraction of my womanly cycle over, Jaken was actually a great conversationalist. His brash and rude comments subsided as I got him talking about himself, his past; his life.

"Believe it girl. I was the ruler of a vast imp tribe. I had it all. I had power and praise! They looked to me for everything, but it wasn't always easy. Ruling a tribe is hard work, though less harmful to the land than you human types. We lived with the world."

I rolled my eyes as Jaken berated the human populace for the seventh time in our short talk. _'Oh brother. Calling humans destructive? I've seen what some demons can do, and trust me, THAT is destructive.'_

I eyed him quickly, sure that amongst his own people he had to have some sort of attractive quality. "What about a family? Did you have one of those?"

He quirked his eye open and glared at me. "Of course I did child! I was the leader of the tribe! What kind of leader doesn't have the company of women?!" He finished his sentence with a huff and emphasized his point by turning back to the trees Sesshomaru disappeared into.

"So you didn't have a wife or a mate or whatever Imps call their partners? No kids? You seem kind of old to not have had kids."

His shoulders slumped and he flicked his head at me, his eyes down cast. "Watch your tongue girl or I should burn it off. And of course I had a family. We may be disgusting to you humans but to us family is everything. Was everything. Her smile could melt the snow and her voice could grow flowers. We had three kids; two strong boys and a girl smart as she was beautiful…"

His eyes took on a shine as he spoke of his family.

"Days before I found my place with Sesshomaru, we were attacked by a very powerful demon. He… He took my wife and three children. Ate them. Devoured them… Killed them. However you want to put it. I didn't even have a chance to save them. Our battle lasted two days before Sesshomaru slaughtered the demon with a swipe of his claws! It was then I decided that there was nothing left for me there. No one else lost what I had and so they could never understand my choice to leave. It was the only way to start new; fresh. I couldn't remain leader of a tribe that did nothing to help me in my time. I had nothing left to give them."

"Jaken…" My heart swelled with pity.

He flipped his tune and became rash again, the moment between us over and done. He sputtered. "Why am I even telling a girl, a human girl about my life? That is none of your concern!"

I kept my mouth shut as he turned away, a hand furiously wiping at his eyes. He took up his position staring into the trees again as I crossed my legs. "Thanks for sharing anyway." I whispered, knowing he could hear me.

X***X

It's been weeks since I started my travels with Sesshomaru. Weeks since I found myself in an even younger version of the land I came to call my second home, and weeks since I had even seen the well I recognized as my connection to my family. Both my families. I considered asking Sesshomaru to take me there; to bring me back to the place this all started but could never find the courage.

I laid on the ground beside our dying fire, the subtle cracking and hissing of the wood the only sound on this silent night. My consciousness dipped in and out of reality as sleep tried to overtake me, but I was scared. I know I looked horrible, but I couldn't sleep. I couldn't. I was plagued with visions of my friends; visions of them huddling together, whispering and talking. Looking for me. I always saw Inuyasha and it was the same thing every time. _'Don't leave me. Come back'_ he would say. But what could I do? It seemed so real. It was real, at least, until I woke up again.

At last sleep won over as I submitted to its overpowering allure. I hoped to all that was merciful in this world that I would have a simple sleep, free from any visions or subconscious messages from my first love. I knew immediately after closing my eyes that it what already too late to sit up. I was already in it.

'Kagome… Don't leave us.'

X*****X

It's been weeks since her eyes lost their luster; since her hair lost its shine and her voice started to crack. Her eyes grew more tired and the circles under her beautiful orbs got darker and deeper. I was confused at first, her sudden snapping and irritation undeserving of any of us. But I could tell as I observed her more closely. She was not well. She was not sleeping.

I had kept my observations to myself, determined to make her sleep in any way necessary. I made sure to camp earlier and earlier each day and provide meals enough to garnish even the most noble of households. I marked the woods around us thickly enough to forewarn any would be attacker or demons stupid enough to enter my ring of death. Any that did? They were quickly dispatched.

Kagome was reluctant to sleep at first, napping for mere moments before snapping herself awake and remaining so until morning. But tonight was the night. Tonight she slept. It was a joyous moment for me, satisfied with that which I have accomplished. Kagome will rest and get better. Right?

"What is it that has caused this change in you M'lord? If it is in your graces to answer one lowly as me that is!" Jaken questioned me, obviously picking up on the subtle changes in our routine.

"Kagome needs rest." I humoured him with a curt response, as I shifted in my own place.

"Ah, yes. I do see what you mean. She has been looking rather ragged hasn't she? Humans are so delicate aren't they?" He gave her a quick glance before flopping himself down.

"Hn."

X***X

A small moan escaped her lips, drawing my attention, even in my own state of rest. Kagome seemed to twitch and jerk in place, her face scrunched with a sad pout plastered on her features. "Inu..Yash..a."

Her voice was obviously pained and confused, soft and sweet. I heard her breathing increase as her heart sped up. She bolted up, her eyes looking out into the nothing as she spoke ever so softly. Don't leave me again. I'm here."

She shook her head, glancing around like nothing happened. She shook her head and rested her eyes on her palms, sighing in defeat.

"Kagome."

She didn't even move. "Sesshomaru? Why are you still awake?"

"Watching."

It was a short pause before she spoke to me. "I can't sleep Sesshomaru. I see him every night. All of them. Always telling me to come back and that they need me. Inuyasha. My Inuyasha, the one I first met. But then his eyes go sad and he tells me that 'He' needs me too. I don't know who 'He' is. But Inuyasha always tells me to come home and then fades away, leaving me all alone. I try to get him to tell me how. To help me. But he never does. I can't keep going on like this."

Her eyes were misty, the combination of sleep deprivation and emotional turmoil creating a storm inside of her.

"I just. Can we go back to where we first met? To the well? I need… Answers." She fiddled with her sleeves, refusing to look at me.

"Very well." I had no desire to get that close to a human village, let alone that one in particular, but for her I will do it. I promised her that I would protect her. That I would wait. That means, I will not give up, even if that means losing her. Tomorrow, we head for the village. Tomorrow night, we find her destiny.

X***X

 **AWE! Poor Jaken. His family all dead. I don't know why I felt the need to give Jaken a little blurb but, I don't think he gets the credit he deserves. (He doesn't deserve much.)**

 **I decided to post another chapter! Taking longer than I thought to finish so… Instead of hoarding 5+ chapters, take this one!**


	30. part 30

Part 30

I forced Kagome to try and sleep as we walked. I carried her on my back like I had Inuyasha so many times before, back when our journey together first started. He was such a pain then, always complaining and always wanting to rest or play. I often left him alone, tiring quickly of his low tolerance for the forest and pining for my old way of life. Back when I had no ties to anyone and freedom to be where I wanted when I chose to be there. How unforgiving I had been then. Lack in my obligation to him; to my families pack. I knew what I had to do, but was never able to accept that he was really my responsibility. After all, I did not sire him. And to expect me, a pure blood to care for this creature born of disapproval from both sides. Why should I accept that burden? ' _Because I was strong enough to shoulder it._ ' I was always waiting until the last moment to be the half-brother he needed. Kagome changed that, weather I wanted her to or not.

She interrupted my recollection with a loud sigh. I could feel her twitching, trying to move; restless on my back.

"Why is Kagome sleeping?" Inuyasha questioned me for what seemed like the thousandth time. Once again, my answer was the same. It was always the same.

"Because."

Could he not answer it himself? Because she is tired. Because she didn't sleep last night. Because she has no energy. It is evident in her appearance and her scent. I'm sure even the lowest of Youkai could sense her weak spiritual pressure. That will have to be his next lesson; observational skills.

"We will break here. Inuyasha. Find me three different flowers with the same scent. One red, one green and one blue."

"Why? Will the flowers help?" He cocked his head, already looking around the bases of trees.

"Yes. They will help." He took off, nose scenting and eyes flickering. _'They will help you._ '

I gently shook Kagome off my back as I propped her on the grass, her form rocking back on her quaking legs. She stood strong but her appearance was not at all brighter. "Sesshomaru? Are we there?"

I stared down at her, my mood getting more vexed the closer we got. "No. You were irritating me."

She didn't even retaliate, only muttering an apology. "Oh, sorry. I guess I just can't sleep anymore."

"Hn." I turned away and found myself a spot to perch, awaiting Inuyasha's glorious return with the three flowers. Guaranteed, the flowers I asked for do not exist. They will not have the same scent. He merely has to become more aware of his surroundings. What better way to teach him to see, than to have him look for that which does not exist?

X*****X

As we slowly drew closer to the village, Sesshomaru changed. He spent less time with Inuyasha and more with me, though his attitude worsened with each step. His irritation grew and his facial expressions could not hide the pure emotions that coursed through him. He always felt obligated to take me off for walks though conversation was impossible when his mood was so poor. We spent most of our time in a comfortable, albeit lonely silence.

With less than a day's travel separating us from the village, he made his move. I could feel his mood in the air thick as a fog, though I had not the skill to decipher it. He led me away from the main path, glancing back several times to be sure I was still following. His eyes always lingered a second longer than necessary though he would deny it if asked.

We stood next to a small stream pouring smoothly over a bed of rock and down into a deep pocket of crystal clear water. Several fish circled the fall, drawn by the splashing liquid. He stared impassively at the treeline, almost ignoring what lay before us; only his flickering eyes and deep breaths gave him away; calming his mind.

"Is the water not enough for you, you have to look at me?"

I smiled instantly, warmed by our first conversation in days. "Just wondering what you were looking at. What you were thinking. As you like to point out, you are quite different from me and it's been days since you last spoke a word."

His brow twitched as he took a moment to consider. "I think of a lot of things."

I grabbed his arm gently, almost childishly as I begged him to tell me just one thing. "Anything. Something. It's like pulling teeth just to talk to you."

"Your expression is senseless. There is no relation to conversing and ones fangs."

I looked at him with a helpless expression. One that seemed to scream 'I don't know how to answer that.'

He huffed and slowly blinked. "Could you tell me what YOU are thinking right now? To describe it, you would have to think about it. You are then no longer just pondering things; you are now changing the nature of your thoughts. They are now ideas, not fleeting moments and lost, meaningless words."

I didn't respond, only looking at him with a sly smile. I could take this one of two ways. He was being profound, or hiding something. I will take the latter. When will I have the chance to tease the great Sesshomaru again? "Were you… Thinking of something embarrassing? Dirty perhaps?" I laughed at the puzzled look he gave me, his eyes piercing me as I snorted.

He turned away, his mouth set. "Tomorrow."

I giggled, my laughter dying down. "What?"

"My thoughts. Tomorrow. We reach the village. We find the well. You leave me."

I lost my smile, my face becoming more thoughtful. "So it wasn't dirty. It was sad. And, what will you do then? When I'm gone?"

"I will move on."

I felt my face drop, my cheeks burning red, all humour drained out of me. "Oh you will just forget about me! How could you be so insensitive! After the things you told me! What we've been through together!" I pushed his arm away from me with more force than I intended, hurt crossing my face. _'After the things you made me feel.'_

His stare was as blank as ever, his gaze focusing on me. "Tell me why! Tell me how you could just so easily forget me?"

He seemed to move without lifting a foot, our bodies pressed together. He leaned forward slightly, his hand tipping my chin up. His mouth was exceptionally close to mine, his voice a whisper. "Stupid girl. I said I would move on, I didn't say I would forget."

He dropped his hand and grabbed mine, holding me in place. "I won't forget our short time together. I won't forget how you make me feel, what I said to you and you to me. I won't forget how you look or how you smell. I won't forget you, because without you, the world is darker. I will move on, because time expects so. But I won't forget. I can't. I will wait for you. If I never see you again, I wait until the next life."

I was crying, fat tears leaking silently down my cheeks and to my trembling lips. I fell into him, losing the feeling in my legs as they gave out. He caught me and held me tightly to his chest as I hung uselessly, sobbing and shaking as I cried and cried. I could hear his heart, strong and confident in his ribs. I could feel his lungs expanding with every breath. I could feel his warmth and the fire inside him, his strength of character and body.

His clawed hand sweep through my hair, a rhythm meant to console and to comfort me; it was soothing. He said nothing, only stood there and supported me. I knew he understood. He knew it was hard and that this decision was difficult. It was tearing me apart.

X***X

I cried myself to sleep that night. I knew Sesshomaru and Jaken and Inuyasha heard me, but I didn't care. I heard Sesshomaru growl his disapproval at anyone who got too close or asked questions. After everyone settled down he crouched beside me and gave me a quick hug, scooping me up and setting me back down just as fast. He didn't say anything, and for that I was grateful. There was nothing he could say, and more words would only make things worse. By morning I will be fine, like nothing happened. And by mid-afternoon, I will be staring down the well. Facing my future head on. Tomorrow, I will go home _. 'Will he remember me? Will I remember him? And, what will I tell Inuyasha?'_

X*****X

 **Does my Kagome in this story sound like a real cry-baby? I think she is... I do. In my next stories she won't be this bad. I want to keep them more in character if I can from now on. Stop bending their minds to fit my story.**

 **Also, next story I make will be in 3rd person. I am starting to dislike first person very much aha.**


	31. part 31

Part 31

I woke with a whole new persona, a new perspective on the day. I pushed last night out of my mind, embarrassed over how I acted, blubbery and weepy. My cheeks reddened momentarily as I allowed myself a moment of self-reflection, remembering last night and the hours preceding. The way he held me, how close his lips were to mine. Such close proximity I could feel his breath, hear his heart. I could sense how strong he was being for me, for himself.

I clapped my hands together, shutting out such thoughts. I tapped my cheeks, trying to dispel the heat from them. Today, I go home. Today, things return to normal! I glanced around, mesmerized by the sun streaming through the trees, illuminating the leafy appendages with the first morning rays. I stood up with a quick, yet thorough stretch, cracking several spots along my spine.

"Must you do that?"

"Sesshomaru. How did you sleep?" I smiled at him, excitement building up inside me.

"Better than Jaken." His lip curved slightly up at his own joke.

I looked at the imp, grasping his meaning immediately. Inuyasha was sprawled in the dirt on top of Jaken, his whimpers of distaste filtering through Inuyasha's thick mane of silvery hair. Inuyasha only kicked and rolled, giving the little ward some space, if only for a moment.

"Are you ready, Kagome? We have half a day's travel before we reach the village." His voice was smooth but I knew he didn't want me to leave. I'm sure he was hoping I would abandon my intense desire to return home and be content to reside here in this world with him. _'I can't do that. I'm sorry Sesshomaru.'_

"I am ready."

X*****X

I led the way soberly as Inuyasha trotted along behind us. He took to teasing Jaken, tapping him on the shoulder, the back, the head and then running away giggling. He had no idea where we were going or why. Naive, how a child should be.

I could almost feel Kagome's excitement as the sun peaked the sky _. 'Noon, normally we would have been there by now._ ' The subtle scent of smoke drifted lazily up the path and wrapped around us. We were no longer in the forest, rather, the outskirts of the town. Kagome jumped in line beside, me, her body vibrating with anticipation as I surveyed the village layout. She skittered and jumped around, inspecting everything she could.

"Yes. Yes this is it. I couldn't forget it if I tried. And the well is just across the town. I can almost see it from here! The Sacred tree too!"

I gave a lazy eye roll. We were way to far yet to even make out details of the town let alone the tiny well and tree she spoke about. "Let's keep moving."

I ignored the feeling rising up in my gut as we closed in on the village. The sounds started out as a whisper, increasing into a dull roar; the hammering, the horses, the chickens... The people.

"Inuyasha. Stay close." I took a deep breath and wrapped myself in a cloak of hate and distaste. I could feel Inuyasha grab the fabric of my hakama, pulling himself closer to me. I felt rage billow at the edge of my consciousness but pushed it back down. Screams erupted from the edge of the village and soon the whole village was a volcano of voices.

"Demons! In the village! Get Lady Natame!"

Several of the villagers had taken up positions along the edge of the river separating me from them. Their long, albeit useless spears were held with shaking hands and their voices betrayed their air of confidence.

"Get out of my way." It was the tone I used with all humans. Cold, steel; a voice that said I was ready to devour you in an instant. Of course that was a false truth. Humans were not anything special and even worse when it came to taste. How those lesser demons could stomach them was mostly due to their inability to catch anything better.

"Lady Natame will rid us of you demon, you and that demon loving woman." The man looked at Kagome, his eyes full of disgust and recognition. "Don't think we won't find that demon spawn either."

I felt Inuyasha sink further into me, hiding his very existence as best he could. My emotions did not register on my face, and they faulted in their insults and threats when I didn't react.

"How dare you threaten Lord Sesshomaru like that you insolent humans! Why he should kill you where you stand for your ignorant words!"

"Jaken. Enough." My voice was darker than it had ever been, the care that once flecked my words now incinerated with the hate.

I started walking towards the small bridge the men stood upon, watching as their weapons started to rattle against their weakening will. Kagome and Jaken followed closely, insults and threats spilling from Jaken's mouth as we passed the men. I reflected on how I handled that, how things have changed for me. Long ago I might have killed those men before they could even speak, but now, just walking them by without so much as even raising a claw. ' _Weakness or was it discipline?'_

I stalked into the village with my mismatched group trailing me, their confidence growing with every step. I held my head high as I was catcalled by courageous villagers, only to have them slink away twice as fast when I glared at them. They parted around us as we neared the village center, closing back in as though to swallow us whole. It was not I who feared them. It was what they could do to my pack should they prove hostile that I feared. It was what could happen to them, should things break free of my control. My fear was warranted as an arrow cut deep into the packed soil at our feet. We didn't stop. _'Trust in me to keep you safe, and safe you shall be.'_

X*****X

I thought quickly about asking Sesshomaru to skirt the village, to go around this dark place instead of through it. But. I feared any more delay in my return home would just make it harder in the end so we passed through. The tension in the air only thickened as Sesshomaru led our rag tag group straight into the heart of the village, right into the middle of the village that would one day house the Shikon Jewel. I knew their defenses would increase over time, but was disappointed at how easily we managed to infiltrate the village, at how slow they were to defend themselves. Should we have a desire to kill them, they would all be dead.

I stared at Sesshomaru's back, watching his hair sway with each step he took. Inuyasha still held on tightly to him, nearly stepping on Sesshomaru's heels with every step. ' _Poor guy. He remembers how mean this village can be._ '

"Halt, demon. What do ye want here? Your kind are not welcome amongst us."

I was not surprised to see Lady Natame bar our path. She held onto her bow with a grace and confidence worthy of her years. Her face was still stoic and her signature sneer was plastered over her features, reminding me that she was not Kikyo. She was not Kaede. She was someone entirely different.

I stepped out from behind Sesshomaru and lightly rested my palm on his chest. I glanced at him before proceeding, a slight nod his consent for me to speak on our behalf.

"Lady Natame," I bowed respectfully. "We do not come here to start trouble, nor do we come here to burden your village. We simply are passing through. You will not see us again. I promise it."

The look in her eye was hard. She was like a piece of flint, bristling and sparking at anything brave enough to take a swing at her. I saw her inspect Sesshomaru, the way her eyes roamed his being, inspecting him like common goods to be bartered away. I stopped myself from curling a lip in disgust. Sesshomaru didn't take that liberty however and a low, threatening growl sounded from deep in his throat.

"Ye best leave and not return, ye hear me?" I saw the doubt in her eye. She knew Sesshomaru could kill them all with one swipe. With one single attack. They wouldn't have a chance. Nor did they have a choice. Sesshomaru would be on her before she could release her bowstring.

We brushed past her, the villagers all too willing to make a path. I released a deep breath when we hit the other side, my excitement coming back ten times stronger. ' _Home.'_

X*****X

It was a strategic move to allow Kagome to speak. Nothing more. I had no words for the human, and it seemed Kagome was a natural born peacemaker. To let her speak was only natural. And now. I stare her future in the face. I stare at the inanimate object that will destroy my world. That damn well.

I felt my heart speed up as she embraced Inuyasha, whispering a few words into his ears as he begged her to stay. I felt my heart tighten as she hugged Jaken, and to my surprise, he accepted the gesture. I felt my heart nearly stop as she stood in front of me, her eyes large and shining. I refused to remove my mask, the same one I used to stalk through the village. She smirked, her eyes flickering back and forth, searching my face for something, anything.

"Well, Sesshomaru. This is it. This is my stop." She took another step towards me.

"If I'm lucky, maybe this past connects to my future. Maybe you will remember me?"

I swallowed but my voice remained calm. "I will. It will feel like an eternity. But I will be waiting for you."

Her lips twitched; quivered. I closed the gap between us before she could let her tears fall. I kissed her, my mouth wrapping around hers and my hands finding her soft curves and pulling her into my sharp angles.

She pulled away suddenly, running to the lip of the well. She didn't turn around as she crawled onto the edge. With one quick glance, she dropped. She dropped down into the well, the grave of several demons already left to turn to dust. I turned away and started walking. I don't want to be here longer than necessary.

A scream tore out from underground. It was a voice I knew; a voice I always craved to hear one more time. Kagome.

A sharp tingle ran down my spine and my blood turned ice cold; fear. I felt a surge of power, much like the power Kagome used when she nearly purified me; it was coming from inside the well. I studied the structure, my muscles clenching. Inuyasha hovered over the edge, his hand pointing down and his mouth in the shape of an 'o'.

"Inuyasha. Jaken!" I yelled. It was the first time I ever raised my voice with such panic. I used my inhuman speed to launch myself towards them, grabbing and throwing them to the grass. Inuyasha screamed in pain and fear as I stood over them, my eyes red and my fangs bared. The energy spewed up into the sky and rained down on the trees. Lesser demons shrieked as the wave hit them, crying and escaping up into the forest. Several were purified on the spot.

My ears rang loud in my head and no sounds registered as I gripped the wooden lip of the well. The remnants of the shock wave were strongest in this demon burial hole and it took all my strength just to approach the edge and look over. I don't know what I expected to see, what I wanted to see; but I didn't expect to see Kagome, my Kagome sitting broken at the bottom of her portal. Her one hand was pulled helplessly through her hair and her other gripping the bone of a demon, its point aimed at her abdomen.

"No! Kagome!"

X*****X

 **I promise that my next stories will be in third person. To stop some of the confusion I've been having with different POV's . I know its distracting to jump back and forth so much. I just don't want to do it so close to my ending. Maybe one day I will revise this whole thing again. Make it more readable and user friendly aha.**

" **What I did I done good and what I done I did well."**

 **-** _ **You don't know me, Art of Dying-**_


	32. part 32

Part 32 – _**Warning, if you don't like sex scenes, skip Kagome's last POV. It is mostly non-explicit, but potentially awkward, as I suck at writing that stuff.**_

X*****X

 _Kagome_

It was the hardest goodbye I have ever had to make. I turned away from my family; from the demons who took me in. I stood on the edge of the well, pushing myself to jump; to not look back. _'Blast it all.'_ I spared a glance, my heart hammering in my chest as I forced myself to jump. Done. Home.

I hit the bottom hard, the air leaving my lungs in a single breath. I chocked momentarily, trying to remember how it was I breathed. My mind swirled. My legs tensed. I clenched my fists, ignoring the dull pain ruminating through my body. A small trickle of blood made rivulets down my forearm from where I struck the carcass of a demon, the sharp bones jutting up out of the dry earth. _'What the hell is going on? Why didn't it work? Or did it work?'_

I looked up at Inuyasha. Not my Inuyasha. My eyes nearly bulged out of my head. He smiled down at me, his hand hanging over the edge and waving at me _. 'No, no, no, no! No! What the hell is happening?'_

I screamed, a sound so feral and unnatural I wasn't sure if it was me. It was an unconscious response, one I couldn't stop from tearing my throat apart. A warm trickle down my throat stopped the sound with its thick metallic taste, gurgling as I tried to inhale past the pooling liquid. I had screamed so hard I was bleeding. I choked and coughed, spitting it out. I clenched my fists, beating the ground with a violence I didn't know I possessed. My nails dug into my palms as I felt my power rising in my body. I started vibrating; the power was too much. It was too much. I looked up to see Inuyasha hanging over the edge pointing at me, his face plastered with confusion and fear. I heard Sesshomaru scream from somewhere above as I failed to stop my wave of Miko power from escaping. I growled loud and steady as the power gained in intensity, resonating with my frustration. My anger; the myriad negative feelings that I could not dispel over the last few weeks. I was tired of being messed with. Always being the one who was weak, scared and lost. Always picked out, singled out. Always.

I cut off my rage, forcing the lid back on my explosion. There was only one answer. The Jewel. I needed the Jewel. That's it! The first time I went through I had it in my side, I was born with this power. I felt my hip, the skin smooth. No scar. It has to be there again! It is my destiny.

I grabbed a rib bone, ripping it from the dirt and hovering it over the jewels resting place. The spot Mistress Centipede tore it from my body. I scarcely heard Sesshomaru yell at me. ' _Now. Do it now before he stops it. It's the only way!'_

I felt my body go numb before I could. My hands went limp and my head lolled. I fell backwards, dropping the bone and staring up at Sesshomaru, and beyond him, to the bright, bright sky.

"Kagome. Kagome? Can you hear me?"

"Inuyasha?" The darkness covered my eyes, a veil of black. "It didn't work. The well didn't work. The jewel."

"Don't give up Kagome. You can't give up. Wherever you are. Find it. It will bring you back." The voice lifted some of the darkness. I could see some light, as though my eyes were closed and I was staring at a dying sun.

"What? Find it? I have it! It's in me, Remember?"

"Find it!"

I blinked several times, my eyes unfocused and blurry. _'Inuyasha.'_

I spoke to no one as I sat up, my hand fingering the bone once again with thick fingers. "I need the Shikon no Tama." I gripped the rib with a white hand, before I could lose my nerve, and plunged the bone into my side, ripping it sideways and out, tearing the elastic skin as I tried to find the jewel that was not there.

An indescribable pain tore through my core and nearly incapacitated me. I stifled a cry, biting my tongue as my weapon of self-mutilation ripped through my skin. I was expecting the Jewel to fly out with the spray of blood, glowing its incandescent purple and promising me my life back. It didn't.

"What?" I stared horrified at the bloody bone as I gripped my side, blood pouring out over my fingers. _'It didn't work? Inuyasha knew. He tried to tell me.'_

I glanced at the wall. The horribly blank and featureless wall. _'It didn't work.'_ And why would it? If it didn't take me through when I jumped. Why would it be inside me now? I'm such an idiot.

Sesshomaru growled at me again, his voice loud and fierce; if not scared. "The barrier. Release your barrier. Now!"

I looked up at him, my face paling and shock coloring my eyes. "It didn't work, Sesshomaru. It didn't work." I fell forward, tears pricking the corners of my eyes. The energy it took to sit up was better spent trying to save my life; it was the same idea with my barrier. The subconscious wall I created between me and this world crumbled down around me, lying broken with me in the dirt.

I closed my eyes against better judgment. _'The jewel. I must have the jewel.'_

Suddenly, I was not much different from the demons courting the precious jewels power.

X***X

"Goddamn it Kagome. What were you thinking?"

I fluttered my eyes open, the dying sunlight streaming past a figure hovering over me. Locks of silver hair fell from their shoulders as a younger lady shuffled in, her hands clasped behind her back. ' _Home?_ '

I parted my lips to speak as I pushed myself up. My voice died in my chest as I realized no, this was not home. This was far, far from home. "Sesshomaru…"

I felt my brows furrow and my lips pinch together.

"Ye are lucky child. Those wounds should have killed ye but that impressive display of purifying power ye did alerted us. It's a good thing too. This demon friend couldn't even get near ye without burning up, not that he didn't try."

Sesshomaru stepped back as Priestess Natame lifted the blanket to observe my wound. She prodded and poked, rubbing some putrid poultice across the open flesh and the scabbed edges. I stared at Sesshomaru as she attended to me, noticing his singed clothing and puckered skin. It was already healing.

She wound my injury tight with strips of cloth, knotting it stiffly. "Try not to disturb the wound if ye can. But rest now." Her tone was authoritative.

I saw her give Sesshomaru a clipped look as she left the hut.

"What did you do?" Sesshomaru looked at me with dark eyes, his voice cold.

I only looked at him.

"You could have died." His voice dropped lower and took on an edge.

"Yes." I didn't know what else to say. I could have. I could have perished back in that well, back with those other creatures obsessed with the jewel; as I am. "But I didn't Sesshomaru."

"But you COULD have. That doesn't make it any better. That doesn't change the fact that you just stabbed yourself. That you blocked me out. That I couldn't reach you. I couldn't save you. What the hell were you thinking?" His eyes went wild and his face twisted with pain and worry, but still held their dark, warning anger. Was he really that close to losing it?

I didn't respond.

"Do you really care for me? For yourself? Are you that desperate to get away from me you would wound yourself to leave? How can I be sure, Kagome, that this won't happen again?"

"Sesshomaru… That's not fair, I…"

He turned his back and left the hut. His face was filled with such pain and anger and worry. He was afraid. And it was my fault. "…love you Sesshomaru…" I closed my eyes and covered my face, my hands massaging my temples in order to alleviate my growing headache. I whispered to the bare walls of the hut. To the dimly lit room in the fading light. "I love you."

X*****X

 _Sesshomaru_

That woman. That girl. That… That human! I raked my claws through a tree, the trunk melting as my poison covered the exposed insides. The village has been most helpful, with some encouragement that is, and Kagome was awake. She was okay. But that didn't help ease any of the tension I had building up inside. She did this. She has hurt me once again.

The sun had went down several hours ago, leaving me to rage under cover of night. The village received the same warning the last one did and I felt comfortable leaving Inuyasha and Jaken to the mercy of the maidens within. Leaving Kagome to the mercy of the priestess.

I raised my hand against yet another tree, the thick bark proving to be as protective as a layer of moth eaten cloth. It fell with a satisfying groan, scaring several tiny song birds in their sleepy daze. They escaped up into the sky and I thought momentarily about using my whip to tear them back down. They were gone before I could make up my mind. _'Gone. Just out of reach.'_

I turned away from my destruction and glared at the village. _'I've made up my mind.'_

X***X

I watched her try to twist and turn, her sighs and hisses of pain when she extended too far the only sound in the tiny hut. She was alone. I lingered in the doorway a moment too long, making my presence known.

"Sesshomaru? Come in. I can't sleep." Her voice was a whisper in the dark.

I obliged, but only because she was ready too. I crouched by her sleeping mat, my legs crossed beneath me.

"I… I'm sorry, Sesshomaru. I don't mean to hurt you. I just…"

I silenced her, my hand hovering protectively over her bandaged side. Over her injury. _'Before she is gone and out of reach.'_

I bent down, my hand supporting me as I loomed over her. I noticed as she tipped her chin back and to the side, subconsciously submitting. Her cheeks flushed expectantly and her breathing increased. _'Before she is gone.'_

I whispered into her ear, "You scared me, Kagome. I can't wait for you if you are dead. I have fallen too deep to turn away now, and to let you leave me again. So whatever happens, you have made a hole next to where my heart should be."

She turned my head gently; slowly so she could look into my eyes. She grazed my lips with hers, "Don't worry, Sesshomaru. I love you. Only you... I'm ready."

X*****X

 _Kagome_

I pulled him over me, lacing my hands through his hair. His mouth explored mine, his hands roaming as freely as mine. He was smooth, gentle, sure not to upset my scabbed side as he lowered himself onto my own body. He unwrapped my legs from around himself as he pulled at the knots of my clothing between him and his prize, making the moment last longer. I took my time undoing his own clothing, teasing wherever possible. He growled, a mixture of play and pleasure. I laughed as he pushed me down, his clawed fingers expertly navigating the many intricate pieces of his own fine robes. I ran my hands up his chest with a burning I could not explain, with a desire that was more than the need to be closer to him. I pulled him down as he wrapped his fur around us, shielding us from the night.

Our evening was long and full of lust and desire. Our bodies intertwined until we were one being; our mouths never strayed far from one another; my body moved with his, slow and steady. I thought of nothing as his hips sped up, meeting my sensitive skin with increased rigor. I lolled my head back, a moan escaping my lips, burning and swollen for more. I twisted beneath him, positioning him where I wanted. I felt my body shudder as he hit my most delicate spot, a shiver raking through my body. He rocked twice more into me, pushing me over the edge. He let out a grunt as I arched into him, my back leaving my sleeping mat. I cried out as pleasure coursed through my pelvis and up into my spine. He pulled away and sat back on his haunches, flipping me on my stomach and pouncing back on me, his own release imminent. He growled as he gripped my hips, his hands shaking as he resisted the urge to dig his nails deep into my skin. He pumped faster and faster, holding me tight to him. He growled with me as I pleasured his other senses with my tiny voice, playing to his basic desires and both a demon and a man.

He found my spot again and hit it in his frenzy. Several vowels filled the otherwise silence as another wave of pleasure coursed through me. I moved to collapse, my knees weakening, but he held me up. He thrust several more times before half grunting, half moaning. He released into me, his hands running hungrily though my hair as he finished his high. He pulled my neck back and leaned over my back, his skin almost feverish against mine. He licked my shoulder before biting down, mixing hot blood with other bodily fluids. He nuzzled his head into my neck as he laid me down, his hands wrapped protectively around me, giving me permission to rest. It felt like an eternity but I fell into a deep sleep with him there, with him wrapped around me. I heard him murmur as my consciousness settled into a relaxed rhythm. "I think I love you too, Kagome."

Then it went dark.

X*****X

 **I am sorry for that most likely poorly written intercourse scene… I wanted you to know they were doing it, but I didn't want to explicitly state it. It makes me uncomfortable. I don't know. As someone who has absolutely no experience with that stuff and doesn't even want to know, I winged it. I wrote based on tips from google, what I read in other fan fictions and what I thought sounded fine from my brain. Hope it wasn't too bad.**

 **Also, if anyone can explain to me why Fanfictions make Sesshomaru and Inuyasha mark their mates that would be appreciated. I made him do it too but I don't know why. Do canines mark their mates or something? I've never heard of it before but maybe somewhere out there they do…**

 **Sorry for the long wait as well. Things have just been long and I have lost my steam for writing. I am slowly getting it back. 04/26/17**


	33. Part 33

Part 33

X*****X

 _Sesshomaru_

It took all my patience and strength of mind to keep calm as Kagome remained bed ridden. It's only been a few days since she attacked herself and she spent most of this second day under surveillance by the village Priestess. Priestess Natame had put her foot down, irritated and annoyed at our presence let alone at Kagome's re-opened wounds. I will take the blame for that one. "Rest is what she needed" she would say as she eyed me with disgust and an all knowing eye. I challenged her with a blank stare and she would eventually look away. It was a win, not a huge victory, but a win none the less.

I sat against the wall of the hut, Kagome's soft breathing lulling me into a trance. The moody priestess had left some time ago, looking for more herbs and attempting to tend to some other business. I knew she was watching us, however. Her scent would always go and come back, like clockwork. The constant baby-sitting was starting to grate on me, as was the unrelenting stench of humans and their fruitless lives.

The sun loomed high in the sky and I could feel my body starting to radiate with the heat. I was burning up both inside and out. Natame was on another one of her endless loops and I could scent her getting closer. Inuyasha had managed to infiltrate a group of ragged children, convincing them to let him play too, so I was alone, even now. I had Jaken standing close to him, watching from afar to make sure he was fine; that the parents would not result to trickery to injure him. But, he was too naive for his own good.

However, I longed for something. Perhaps it was for the pack I had become accustomed, for our days spent wandering. For the open forest and clear sky. Anything besides this dirt packed, creature infested, thatch hut cesspool of human waste and vile practices. Or did I long for my solitary, wandering lifestyle to resume? I briefly considered taking advantage of our rest to train Inuyasha some more, but decided not. Agitating the villagers was not something I wanted to deal with, particularly for Kagome's sake.

Inuyasha's happy voice rang out through the village, mixed with the shrill ring of children playing. I could feel the other human's disapproval, as I disapproved of them playing with him, but this wasn't about what I wanted or believed. The humans left well enough alone, tolerating him playing with their children only because I could kill them with a flick of my wrist. And so, I sulked some more in the maddening heat.

I sighed for the umpteenth time, my mood darkening as the sounds and smells and overall condition of my imprisonment worsened with mid-day. I sat with my eyes closed, imagining how these humans would feel under my claws, how they would cower in fear rather than turn heel with repulsion and disgust; to think they would mock one such as I, and believe they were immune to the wrath boiling inside. I tried to dispel these dark thoughts, instead, focusing on Kagome. I focused on her breathing, on her heart beat; on the only thing I could since I have been trapped in this building. I stared absentmindedly at the shoulder I had marked, remembering the taste of her blood, the feel of her skin, her shallow breathing and the simple sounds she made. I thought back to that night, the raw drive I felt when she grabbed me and when I touched her.

I pushed those thoughts away and escaped, sweeping myself out of the hut. I ignored Natame as I observed quickly my surrounding before turning to the sky, disappearing in a flash of light. I worked my way up higher than any creature dared to go and then some. I paused, my senses magnified over thousands of miles in this high altitude. I could see more, smell more and hear more. Then I fell. I allowed myself to fall back to the earth. The wind whipped past my face as the forest below me approached at a fast pace. I summoned my inner beast. Transforming at such a high altitude, I heard nothing as my form expanded well beyond my hidden self. The trees swayed far below me as the wind from my Youkai reached them, but I was already running through the sky.

' _Why didn't mother warn me that falling this deep would steal my freedom? That these creatures were like parasites sucking at the protection I had to offer? That I would become slave to protecting the weaker of my choosing? Of course she didn't expect my interest to be a human did she? And so she could not anticipate the dilemma I seem to find myself in. My freedom is not lost, just entwined with another. Yes. That is all. But why am I still so angry?'_

I flexed my massive paws and yawned, canines flashing to my fluffy audience. I ran passively through the sky, dodging mounds of fluff and diving straight into streams of cotton. I climbed higher into the sky, sure that I could touch the sun with only a few more leaps. I continued my play for a while more, enjoying the open air, the fresh breezes. The silent world above and below; the ruler of the sky itself.

X***X

I stepped into the village and the force of senses that assaulted me was astonishing. I could hear everything. I could smell everything. I could taste everything and I refused to even touch anything. I resisted the urge to turn tail and leave again, but I forged on. I considered not even walking on the same ground as these humans, to summon my cloud, but, an unnecessary action it would be. These humans need not know that the very ground they walk is repulsive. I sighed inaudibly. We must go. Now.

The thick smell of tears assaulted my nose and my hands clenched as the wailing increased. It was the sound of Inuyasha begging that stopped me. The sound of another child talking and Inuyasha fighting. _'Demons, do not beg.'_

I followed the sound to a small clearing within which Inuyasha stood face to face with a boy, his size suggesting he was old enough to be considered a man, by humans anyway. Inuyasha had his hands brought up protectively over his ears as the boy poked at him, hissing and sputtering insults. Inuyasha longed to poke back, his claws digging deeply into his thick hair, but afraid of the anger he would bring upon himself. His will to fight was strong, but his fear of maiming or incurring the wrath of the village stopped him. A small girl sat in the dirt, her tear streaked face rumpled with an injustice only a child would understand.

I bit back the impulse dismember a small child that dared to grab my leg as I approached. His greasy hand held tight to my hakama, dirtying the pastel white fabric. Even small humans were just annoying miniatures of the adults in which they would grow. I shook him off and continued toward the disturbance.

"Inuyasha. Come."

I saw the boy stiffen, unaware of my return, and his back only straightened more. I could smell his fear.

With a small huff, Inuyasha glared at the grass and started to sidestep the larger boy, only to be blocked and shoved back, hitting the ground. I felt my eyes narrow. "Move." My claws flexed within my sleeves, the tips warming with a poison ready to seep out.

He yelled at me, his voice cracking, betraying his bravery. "He owes my sister an apology."

I signaled Inuyasha once more.

"Bravery is wasted on the weak and the stupid. Move."

He shook his head, pointing one grubby finger at the equally dingy girl sitting in the dirt, her eyes shining with crocodile tears. "I will protect Miya and the village from half breeds like him and demons like you. You shouldn't even be in this village. None of you! I heard my pa talking," He licked his lips, a small, nervous smirk playing at his mouth. "He said that priestess has you on a leash. That she is not a pure anymore; a whore is what my daddy said!" He hooted, standing taller as he dared face me; a challenge.

My anger got the better of me and I imbedded my claws in the tough packed earth before the boy's feet, knocking him to the ground with a spray of dirt. The fear in his eyes was exhilarating as his smile dropped from his cracked lips, the smell of fresh tears and the scent of terror. The other children screamed and bolted, calls for parents ringing through the village. I could hear a mob gathering already.

I glared at him, face to face, my lip curling as I growled low and deep. Inuyasha scooted behind me, his eyes bright with interest now that the tables have turned. "I am terror. You would do well to remember. Filthy human."

"You don't scare me. That other priestess holds your heart. I saw how you were when she was brought into the village. I saw you. Scared. I saw it. You know fear." His voice was small and weak, a whisper to the wind.

I felt my heart flicker, the heat building up behind my mask. Fear. Is that what that was? Kagome, my feelings for you have lessened the fear I instill in others. This child dare challenge me. What did falling for you do for me?

I glared at the boy, the urge to tear into him spiking. My eyes flashed red as I reached forward, gripping his kimono. I pulled him off the ground and stood my full height, his eyes widening. He dangled in my grip, his hands wrapping instinctively around my forearm, trying to break my hold. I stared at him, at the pitiful morsel in my clutches. How easy it would be to dispatch him. To rip his throat out and spill his blood onto the parched dirt.

His sister cried to him, reaching her hands up, trying to grip my other arm. I released some of my poison, letting it pool at my foot.

"Miya, no! Don't touch it! Run Miya. Run." His eyes glazed and his bladder loosened as he realized he was going to die. He is giving in to me. I win. I win. I will reinstall the fear lost. I will not be favoured by humans. I raised my arm, the acid glowing a hot green. Demons do not need humans.

"Sesshomaru! Put him down!" Kagome screamed at me, her face red and her hands white knuckled around her bow. She leaned on it for support, as though she couldn't hold her own body up. Several villagers surrounded her, their eyes wide and wild. They held short swords and pitchforks. Some held torches, others bows. All trained on me.

Jaken was silent, something that didn't happen often as he hid behind Kagome, his eyes never meeting mine. I stared her down defiantly as I held the child tighter, his whimpers filling our hushed stare down, his fresh urine stench clogging my nose.

"Sesshomaru please. Put him down. Don't do this. Especially now." Her face turned pleading, her voice begging.

I glanced around, at the eyes and faces. _'This is what they want. A docile demon; a pet.'_

I dropped him, his body hitting the ground with a satisfying slump just beside my pool of acid. I started to walk away, stepping casually over the hole I made in the road. I glanced back at Inuyasha, his face drawn tight and his steps forced. I looked at the villagers with my peripherals. They sighed in relief, never realizing how close they were to being flattened beneath my bulk. I growled; a bad taste in my mouth. _'I should have just killed him.'_ I heard Kagome chasing me down; her weakness forgotten.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" She tore into me, her steps doubling speed just to keep up to my pace.

This village. This place. These people.

"I am leaving."

"That is a good idea, because we are no longer welcome here. Did it occur to you that we could have left without maiming a child?" Her sarcasm bristled me. I didn't know why I felt the need to attack her, but I pushed past that.

I turned on her, forcing her to take two steps back. She winced and grabbed her side as she scuttled backwards. "I didn't have to."

"Have to what?" Her tone was challenging.

"I didn't have to wait anymore."

Her mouth clamped shut. Her frown deepening on her beautiful face. "What do you mean by that? Sesshomaru?"

"I wanted to."

I turned my back to her, my ability to feel overridden by the disgust and anger coursing through me. With patience spent, I left her standing in the middle of the village road, scores of people refusing to make eye contact with her as they stepped up to her, expelling her from the village.

' _She is still mine.'_

X*****X

 _Inuyasha_

Inuyasha looked forlorn between Sesshomaru and Kagome. Her face was filled with hurt and a mix of betrayal, pain and embarrassment. Sesshomaru stalked on, his face back to pure, unadulterated boredom. He was saved again; Inuyasha. He relied on his brother again to save him. On someone else to protect him. It left him sour that he could not even protect himself against a child. Even with the lessons he has gotten. He just couldn't bring himself to harm him. But Sesshomaru. He was going to kill him. He didn't hesitate to take the boys life; until Kagome stopped him that is. Why was Sesshomaru so strong? Why was he so weak?

Inuyasha's face dropped and his eyes cracked, his face settling to a blank stare. They don't believe he is one of them, and demons do not see him either. I have no place, he thought. I will make one for myself, that's all. Inuyasha steeled his face. He followed Sesshomaru with a silent gaze, growling at Kagome as he walked by. She followed weakly and he felt a small sense of power. He pulled a ring of flowers out of his robes, crunching the fresh blossoms in his fist before crushing them under foot; lifting his head high. No longer was he going to be saved. He was a demon, and humans had to understand that. They don't trust him, don't respect him and don't want him around. They push him around and push him away. They are rude and callous and untrustworthy. He can't trust anybody. Inuyasha flexed his claws, knowing deep down, he would only gain the respect he deserved through strength. It was the only way. He will make them fear, for that is the only way they will accept him now. They will know his name. They will know what he can do. Strength is what he desired now. He will be stronger than Sesshomaru and even he will acknowledge his strength. For even Sesshomaru does not believe in his power, no matter how much he feinted.

X*****X


	34. part 34

Part 34

X*****X

"That pride will kill you one day. Yes sir it will. Heritage is a draw of luck, not skill or one's own choice of will. It was an accident, it was random, and it was not optional or voluntary. To be demon, a human, or a little something in between is not a trait worth killing and mauling and mocking and meandering. Man or woman, boy and girl, animal and human and tree and still... To be tall or short or flawless; thick or thin or strong or smart; it wasn't pride that got you that, and so your pride, it's wasted on nothing.  
An act of your own will, an achievement measurable by the character of your heart or by the strength of your own determination, an act independent of your physical self. That is pride, but anything less than your own accomplishment is the will of fate. Pride is useless, that is no doubt. It will kill you one day, and of that I'm certain."

X*****X

 _Kagome_

I limped along, my side aching with every step I took; with every movement that stretched my side the wrong way. I sighed, frustrated with the direction my fairy tale life took, with the hope that raised itself, only to be crushed back down. I refused to talk to Sesshomaru, and him me. I couldn't help but dwell on what he had said to me, at what he insinuated. He got what he wanted from me. He got me. He marked me. Is that why he humoured me? To finally get what has been denied to him? Did he do all this for sex? To mark as many humans as he could? Demons? Did he do it just to claim me? How many others have there been, how many others bare his mark?

I shook my head, dispelling the cruel thoughts that slandered his noble character. He may have said harsh words, but he stayed because he wanted to. He said so himself.

"I didn't have to wait anymore. I wanted to."

' _But, does that make it any better? He said it to hurt me, and weather he meant it that way or not, he still said it to_ _ **just**_ _to hurt me. And that's just as bad as using me.'_

I stopped walking, hugging my arms around my body in a vain attempt to stifle the deep hurt. To remember what was important now. _'Maybe I should go it alone from here? Maybe going home won't be as hard as I thought. I'll find the jewel, and I will go. I will not burden you any longer, Sesshomaru.'_

X***X

The sun crested the horizon, its deep reds and ranges and yellows streaking the sky, bright paint on an otherwise blank canvas. The dark sky to the east only looked torn and looming, emphasized by the chill in the now mild wind. I haven't spoken since leaving the village and everyone looked lost in their own thought. Inuyasha's face was dark and stormy, much like my insides felt. Jaken was quiet, though I knew it was only time before he said something otherwise stupid, bringing the wrath of Sesshomaru down upon himself. _'Always swinging first. Does no one else matter with that man? Demon.'_

I shook my head, taking a shallow breath and huffing it out quickly. _'What am I thinking? Why am I being so cynical to him now? I knew who he was and what he was capable of. The Sesshomaru I knew tried to kill his own brother. Tried to kill me! I knew who I was getting into it with. It's my own fault for thinking he could change who he was destined to be; that I could change him.'_

I looked critically at our chosen camp site, our dictated spot before claiming a small chunk for myself. It was exposed at every corner, something Inuyasha would have not tolerated, but was normal for Sesshomaru. He didn't know the fear we did of the larger demons that would gladly slurp us up. I fell back and looked blankly at the sky, noticing Inuyasha's drawn look and dark eyes. The way he folded himself up quietly and watched was strikingly similar to the Inuyasha I knew and used to love. _'Inuyasha, what happened today?'_

Sesshomaru, not tonight, but soon I'll oppose you; tonight I will sleep. Tomorrow I will confront you. You have no right or reason to attack me. As I have no reason to attack you. _'Sesshomaru. What is your problem?'_

X*****X

 _Sesshomaru_

I cast my hand out carelessly, a quick indication for my meager group to stop; to cease following me. Her limping and almost inaudible grunts of pain every few steps had worn me down to nothing. _Why the sudden hostility? Why do I attack where attack isn't warranted, where aggression and anger do more harm than good, destroying the delicate self-confidence of Kagome, my prospected mate?_

I continued forward, leaving them all behind in the falling dark. _Loathing is in my blood. I am what I have always been. Can I defy the destiny that swirls in my blood? As fate would have it, I will not change, but I am not one to be told what I can and cannot do._

I spent the night away from the camp, but close enough no lesser demons dared scent my pack and attempt to attack. My aura was billowing enough to dispel the demons even from the mountains themselves, sending them slithering across the sky like a great carpet of snakes. There will be blood in the human villages tonight. With such great numbers the demons are sure to attack without fear of being killed by the primitive and albeit weak human tools. Tonight, the moon will turn crimson and the rivers will be tainted for days downstream, the sky will darken and the air will thicken. Already the scent of death clings to the world. I hope the village near the forest, the village with the dry well, is the first to be targeted.

I sat against a tree, my back pressed flat and my knees brought up just far enough my arms could rest and hang over them. It was a flash of memory, but a memory all the same. A moment much like this one, sitting in the starry clearing with Inuyasha at my feet. It was long ago, back on our very first night together. He pointed at me, at the way I seemed to glow in the darkness. He called my brilliance beauty, for that was what it was. I had scoffed at him. He is a child, and as such he was inclined to utter such nonsense.

Based on that memory, that phantom from my past, I did realize that in this glade, against the darkness of the trees, I was the pinnacle of beauty. The moonlight reflecting off my skin, my clothing; the inexpressible nature of my features and the deadly beauty my clawed hands held. Even the marks on my hands and cheeks burned with a fierce determination that screamed to the world for recognition _._ Ever since that day I have been aware of my fair looks and prowess, one of the many gifts inherited with my particular, pure, demon blood. It was a characteristic of mine that I tailored to the memories of the country, for who could ever forget the man who killed without even dirtying the whites of his clothing? He who out-glorified even the most beautiful of village women? And it is only right those beneath me remember me, something I consciously thought while subconsciously making sure of it. But it was this moment that I was hyper-aware of who I was, what I was, where I was, and why I was here. _For once in my life I don't know what to do. So many paths, so many scents and options and directions, but all are incomplete. The natures of my thoughts are alien; my feelings are abominations to demon kind. But, they will never go away. They are like the moon. I can cover it up, it can be swallowed in darkness, but still the desire shines through. My desire shines through._

I closed my eyes and relied on my senses to keep watch, wondering exactly what Kagome would say tomorrow. She had so much to say today, but refused to even look to me. I hurt her, which was the intent, but now. Now, I just want her to smile again.

X***X

We had been walking for several hours since day break, trudging along the countryside with near silence. Kagome was quiet, expected, but her closeness was surprising. She had something to say, something that had been eating at her since morning, but her voice refused to speak. She merely walked beside me, her hands reaching for me then pulling back. Her eyes were always trained on a point off in the distance or to the side, always looking away, but always coming back for a quick glance. It didn't escape me, the way she avoided my eyes. I was, after all, a predator. Details did not hide from these eyes.

X*****X

 _Kagome_

' _Tell him. No don't. I should, but then again...'_

I growled to myself, frustrated and anxious. My feelings were hurt more than my body and my spirit was dampened more than the grass we walked on. He doesn't want me, not really. He wants what I can do for him. He doesn't love me. He lied. Demons lie.

"…" Damn Kagome, just, ask him to talk. Now. "S…"

My lips snapped shut as he turned to look at me. ' _He heard that? I barely started!'_

I swallowed thickly. "Sesshomaru."

He said nothing as he looked me over once. His eyes were trained not to show emotion, but I could still sense a glint of hardness to them. A hardness that told me I was making the right decision.

"I have decided to go." His eyebrow twitched.

"Go…" His voice pulled on the word, stretching it thin.

"Alone, without you... Guys." I held my breath, waiting for I don't know what. Jaken voiced his opinion loudly. He was eager to be rid of me as his words said, but his face was different. He glanced at Sesshomaru, as did Inuyasha, silenced by the one dry word he uttered.

"Why."

I thought he would turn and walk away. I didn't expect to explain myself to him. Inuyasha and Jaken yes, but him?

"You hurt me, Sesshomaru. You said things. Things that you can't take back. The meaning was implied, Sesshomaru. Whether you meant it or not, I don't know, and frankly I don't care. I don't... I will not burden you with my presence anymore. I will find the Jewel and I will go home. No sense in prolonging the inevitable. I will leave now, and you can finally forget about me. And… I can forget you. It is easier this way."

He turned his back to me, his eyes flashing. "Easier? Easier for who?" He stood a moment before quickly walking off.

I wasn't sure what I was expecting. A heartfelt apology, maybe. A hug or even eye contact. But it was the dismissive way with which he treated me that I knew I made the proper decision.

X*****X

 _Sesshomaru_

Leave. Leave? Why does she want to leave? My words may have been harsh, but no worse than anything else I have said. Or done. Why. Why now. Kagome.

I turned my back to her. Things I have never felt, things I didn't even know I could feel flashed through my chest. My heart felt tight and my nose burned; my eyes felt dry and sensitive. I walked away quickly as I realized what the emotion was. Sadness. It was not like the panic and fear I felt when Kagome was injured. This was a lot deeper. This was a lot stronger. This, this was a lot more painful.

Composure and confrontation; composure first. I left them standing there as I retreated to the trees. My chest tightened even more as the distance between us grew. This wasn't just about goodbye. This was her rejecting me. This was her not wanting me. My mate doesn't want me. Why? I felt my anger start to rise, the sadness being overridden by a less painful emotion. She can't leave.

I turned, but stopped. An unfamiliar smell filled my nose, electric and intense. I surrounded me, her very essence. A barrier. I tapped the sphere, my brows furrowing. She was by far more powerful than I imagined, and I howled in rage and in panic.

X***X

I stalked back to the clearing, the barrier torn down by the intensity of my demonic power. My face was dark and my eyes flashed. I looked quick; Jaken, Inuyasha... Kagome?

"Jaken, Kagome?" I felt my eyes narrow as he turned away.

"She said good-bye My Lord."

X*****X

 **I've been messing with this chapter for days and days now. I don't know how to improve it, so here it is. There is a lot of indecision on Kagome's side and Sesshomaru's side too. I like it that way. It's almost like a barrier for them. They both have things they need to get over. Trust each other damnit!  
As always, the end is near; maybe a few more chapters. My next stories will be less haphazard, this one started off my phone so it was never planned properly. I am older and a little wiser now so. (I say wise, but that is probably a lie aha.)**


	35. part 35

Part 35

X*****X

I felt my mind grow foggy before I felt my limbs stiffen. Fatigue. How I made the barrier I do not remember, but it took the form of my extreme stress and emotion. This time, it wasn't fear that pushed me to the edge of my ability. It was hurt. It was determination. And it was a painful realization that burned like a knife to the heart.

I could hear him scream in outrage, but I only quickened my pace. My scent, for I know that is his preferred method of tracking, was like a beacon in the dark, an arrow over my head flashing and flashing, "Here I am, here I am!" I stopped momentarily beneath a small tree, its lazy leaves flapping in a small breeze that blew to my back. _'The world is on my side.'_

I grabbed a handful of the fertile soil from the base of the tree and grimaced. The dirt looked clean enough, and by clean I meant free of worms and beetles and every other manor of multi-legged creature I could see. I chose not to think of the multitudes that were smaller still, wiggling their way through the dirt. I rubbed it over my shirt, over my skirt and along my legs and arms. I refused to put the stuff in my hair, however, even though I knew that was a mistake. Any scent of mine would draw him to my side. If he wanted to find me that is.

I glanced down at myself and stifled a laugh. It was not an amusing site to see myself covered in dirt, rather, it was the lengths in which I had to go to not be followed that caused the laughter. Sesshomaru's nose was impeccable, it was able to scent better than any animal in our world. I laughed at how futile my attempts to hide were. Especially when the would be pursuer was him.

X***X

I jumped at every sound that was not my own, and even then I jumped when I snapped a branch with my own hand, tearing it right off a dying tree. I stopped quickly and pressed my back to the tree, listening. I stopped long enough to let my heart calm down and to, re-dress, in a sense. I grabbed fistfuls of leaves and dirt and bark, masking my scent once more. I was surprised that this worked; that Sesshomaru hadn't burst out of the trees moments after my departure…

"No, stop it Kagome. You made your choice, he made his. Stop waiting for him to chase after you like some heated beast." I chastised myself, wrinkling my nose.

"We have one goal now. The Jewel. What did that old flea say about the Jewel? Oh! Myoga! He is still alive too isn't he! Why haven't I seen him hanging around?"

I continued to talk and wonder aloud as I wandered down a game trail, filling the silence with an endless stream of my own idle chatter. The path soon widened into a discernable road and I picked up speed, hoping a village was on the other end. While I walked, I rolled the memories I had of the Jewels origins and whereabouts around in my head; all the precious memories Sango and Myoga provided me in the Slayers village. Logically, I should visit them to get my answers about its current whereabouts, but they were too far out of the way. Besides, who's to say they would be accepting of an outsider who knows so much about the Shikon No Tama? About their village when, clearly, I have never been in the village? _'Of course I could save Sango a whole lot of heartache in years to come. I could warn the village. I could save so many.'_ I shook my head sadly at my own thoughts. I can't. Even if they did believe me, the world I know is already shattered for Sango. If I was to go back, I doubt my changes here would matter much there. They would just think I'm crazy.

Besides, it may not even be in the slayers village, and that's a long journey for no pay. Yes. That's it. I can't go to that village. I just have to look elsewhere. The hair prickled and the base of my skull, tingling with a sense I knew all too well; a faint sense at that. Children back home would have related what I had to a spider sense of sorts, and they weren't wrong. I could sense the Shikon Shards and that always, always brought trouble. In a way, I am the spider-man of the Feudal Era. _'Looks like the world really is on my side.'_

I chased after the sense as fast as I could, slipping over boulders and hurdling fallen logs. As I leapt over a log I caught my hair on a branch, tugging the soft strands from my head. I felt the strip of cloth I used to secure it slip off, releasing my hair and allowing it to cascade around my face. I ignored it with an irritated huff and only ran faster.

The Jewel was pulling me away from the village I was approaching and back into the forest; a thick, intimidating forest like the one I was always warned as a child not to go into alone. The Jewel moved far quicker than I could ever have hoped to, first away, then back towards me. It was in the moments of its approach that I felt my heart jump with fear. The bow and meager supply of arrows I had would only do so much against a typical demon, but one with the power of the Jewel fueling its body? I went hollow with fear, but did not turn around. There was nowhere else for me to go, not anymore, so forward was the only reasonable option.

' _It's time to go home, or die trying.'_

X*****X

Faint, distinguishable, but faint. Her scent was all over the woods, wrapped carefully around a tree, in the leaves and the grass. It was a straight arrow to a destination I knew for sure; anywhere way from me. I had launched myself at Jaken, pinning the squirming demon to the ground and hovering my poison claws threateningly over his head. His babbles were the same as Inuyasha's had been. 'She just left. She didn't say where she was going. Sorry, sorry, sorry Mi'lord.' I wanted for nothing more than to cave in his head then and there. To maim the little imp before he could utter another sentence filled with fear and squeals of terror. Inuyasha cowered next to a tree I had fallen; his bravado and attitude forgotten in the heat of his own fear. Inuyasha. A petulant child to the end.

When Jaken finally went silent, I glared him down a moment more before he spoke, his voice steady but his eyes wide and terrified. If I was going to kill him, he would be dead. He knew it.

"Killing me, will not bring her back, Mi'lord. She wants the jewel, she will seek the jewel."

"Why should I _want_ her back again? Why should I, once again, chase her down? Tell me Jaken." My voice was seething, dripping with malice and anger.

His response was slow to come and his voice was quiet when he finally gave me his answer. "For the same reason you chased her down the last time, Mi'lord."

I growled and stood up. I started walking after a moment's consideration. This was the fourth time she ran from me, the fourth and the final time. This will be the last time I hunt her down. She will tell me once and for all if she wants me; if I am enough for her. I sighed and buried the anger back down inside.

With a hint of steel, I turned to glance back at Jaken. "Jaken."

He stuttered. "Ye… Yes? Mi'lord?"

"I wish I could just… forget. This. Her. The pain… I have no control. Only time can take it away Jaken. And I will live for a very, very long time."

I strode away as though I never spoke those words, leaving the two of them to sit beside the destruction I wrought.

Trying not to love somebody, only makes you love them more.

X***X

Kagome is a smart girl. Her scent became earthy, lost in the breeze that hindered my tracking with its irregular bursts of wind. It was not, however, enough to stop me dead. Even with the scent of crushed leaves and branches, grass and soil, Kagome was clearly visible to my nose. She didn't think that played out trick the humans believed to be so effective actually worked against me did she? A mere beast, yes. But not me.

Her scent drifted off the trail and down a scraggly animal path. By the size of it, it was not a regularly used animal trail, rather an old trail in the process of growing back in. Why she would come this way was beyond reasoning. She knew better.

I followed the trail a while more, noting the poor shape it was in. No doubt the reason it was abandoned by even the animals. Her scent was getting stronger and I felt my feet moving faster despite myself. Then it stopped. I narrowed my eyes, surveying the trees around me in a swift move. There. Fluttering in the fork of a tree was the simple white hair band Kagome had used to secure her hair back. I preferred it to be falling around her shoulders and face, but it was more convenient for her, so my silent objections were invalid. I swiped it out of the tree pocketed the swath of fabric, retracing my steps to follow a muddied trail of leaves and thick dingy mud. Kagome. It was a poor diversion, which only increased my irritation at falling for it more.

I never even noticed the branches curling victory.

X*****X

I stifled a silent scream as a field of trees fell. In all it was a boring motion. The leaves shimmered and the trunks, most of which were mighty and flexible; trunks that should have withstood the shock of major storms and earthquakes together, simply bowed down. They hit the ground all around me as gravity took over and pulled them down faster. The ground vibrated with the impact of so many trees and I laid curled under a Cyprus; the branches filling my vision with a thousand shades of green. I wiggled a little, testing my body for any signs of entrapment and forced my legs under my body. I pushed my way up through the thick limbs, the easiest way out of the tangle. I stood tall on the tree and surveyed the damage. The ground was a sea of green with islands of ropey roots and split bark. The forest, impossibly, was no longer. Before I could even consider what happened I was ripped off my feet. The tree below me was dragged forward, as were the others, sending me tumbling backwards onto the ground and back through a mass of dying branches. I swore aloud as I landed on my back and covered my face to block the scratching twigs that were dragged over me, issuing me a handful of new scratches along my forearms. A demonic aura was massing.

I stood up in a defensive position with my bow at the ready, though I knew it wouldn't protect me anyway. The trees creaked and groaned as bark was ripped apart at the seams, stripped from the trunks only to be melded back together in ominous and dark shapes. The leaves shriveled and blackened on their respective branches and the roots stuck themselves up in odd angles, tying and braiding around each other. The final form of the beast was hideous. The once beautiful trees were twisted and darkened, tainted with the evil seeping from the creature's malevolent soul. The demon sat hunched on all fours, its body made strictly, and entirely of hundreds of solidified trees, compressed and densely packed. This demon was smaller than Sesshomaru, almost half the size, but thicker in the chest and forelegs. The front legs were weighted down by several of the largest trees that tapered off into sharp points at the elbows. It had four sets of claws; smoothened and glossed wood that, had I not seen the transformation myself, could have been made of polished rock or any material capable of such luster and strength. It had a wide sweeping tail of thin Cyprus, which to a creature this size was no heavier than a rooster's tail is to itself, but for me, spelled death in a single swipe.

The creature stood like a deformed gorilla with its hind end closer to the ground and its front propped up on thick weighty limbs; not quite upright, not quite on all fours. It was not at all similar, however, to the majesty Sesshomaru displayed with his own beast transformation. This was a grotesque display of the power of the jewel, but beautiful all the same; for the jewel to unite a whole forest was an unimaginable demonstration of the strength it contained.

Spikes of jagged tree, cut and shaped so as to be sharp as a razor poked off its back. Its face was long and narrow with dark eye holes seeming to have been gouged roughly from the hardened wood. A single orb of red glowed from within each hole.

' _This explains why the jewel was circling me; a tree demon. It must have been this entire forest the whole time, shooting the jewel from root to root! It was centering me.'_

The longer I looked at the creature the more hopeless it seemed to become. My arrows are few and my aim is fine, but the confidence with which this creature showed itself was daunting. I got lucky with those moth demons, suffering only minor wounds, but even then we lost so much. I grimaced. But this one, while earth bound, is up against me and only me. No wolves. No Koza. No strategy. No Sesshomaru.

' _Go home or die trying.'_

I focused on the creature, looking for any weak spots and any possible points in the wood to lodge an arrow. It was solid. The Jewel was buried under several thick layers and I doubted I would be able to pierce it more than once before it caught on to what I was about.

The jewel throbbed in its chest like a blackened heart and the demon twitched with life. A thin crack split the demons face and it opened its mouth in a gross approximation of a grin. The demons voice was deep and splintered, a voice fitting a tree I supposed.

"The jewel implanted in my chest demands your blood. I don't know you, and I have no desire to be more than my forest, but the thirst is unmistakable. I shall abide the jewel's wish, and you shall become one with the forest. You shall nourish the seedlings yet to come with your flesh."

My first mistake was this. I underestimated the creatures speed. With its body bulked with the mass of hundreds of trees, I figured it would be too heavy to move properly. I was wrong. The demon launched forward with back legs made of twisted and braided branches, soaked in sap and resign for strength. I bolted instantly out of the way, a movement that was more instinctual than anything. Cover. Find cover. I can't fight this demon in the open. I have no chance. But, if I can lure it into another forest or even a mountainous path… It would be slowed tremendously.

X*****X

…..

….

…

..

.

 **Summer. Camping, vacations, actual work at my job. I have almost,** _ **almost**_ **, zero time to write. I am just so tired after work. The joys of having a mentally draining job vs a physical one. At least physically drained, I can still use my head. Once I hit that mental block, I'm just dead; like a battery past its life. I wish I worked outside. And to be honest, I had fun writing the piece about the tree demon (Google said it's pronounced Ah-O-Ki-Gah-Ha-Ra. It is suicide forest in Japan, beautiful looking place. I borrowed the name because I couldn't put together a good one). It just came to me, like, I need a villain and boom. Tree demon. Huge, scary, and enough to give even Sesshomaru a headache.**


	36. part 36

Part 36

X*****X

I applauded my own choice to seek Kagome out. Her scent was wrapped in the distinct fog of another demon. How she did not notice she was _inside_ the demon's vortex of power was not a question for me, but did call question upon her instincts as a priestess. She has managed to find herself in more danger than I have in all the years I've been alive. I shook my head slightly, irritated beyond all relief, but also worried. The earthquake I had felt was not at all natural. That was made apparent by the swelling aura I felt. I took several small steps forward before I launched myself up and away, chasing her scent for all new reasons. If Kagome was in danger, I couldn't turn the other way and walk. If Kagome got hurt or worse… I blinked away the mixed feelings, the urge to hunt and destroy this threat to my mated half. She may not want me, but that doesn't change what we had done, how I had marked her as mine. She is mine, and I will re-claim her as such.

' _She is mine.'_

X***X

I launched through the trees, Kagome's scent surrounding me, teasing me, taking me one way and then another. I was also inside the demon. That I was certain of. It was subtle, but I could sense the trees shifting, rotating, and moving not only me, but the ground beneath my feet in a way that any average demon wouldn't notice. But I wasn't just any demon; I was far greater. I whipped my hand out at the trees as I jumped high into the sky, releasing my poison whip and jaggedly ripping it across the tender flesh of the forest. The trees gave resounding angry screams as they fell. Several spirits abandoned the now useless shells of the trees and escaped into the dense foliage, determined to possess a new vegetative host. If I wanted to free the forest, short of cutting it all down, I had to take out the mother. I had to take out the castor of these demons, and I had to destroy its soul.

A sudden iron grip on my lower calf ripped me off the ground and dangled me high above the fallen trees, a most indignant pose for myself. I scowled, my brows meeting and my eyes flashing. My long silver hair fell and hung from my head like a long curtain towards the ground and my fur dangled adjacent to it. The roots of the severed trees held my leg tight and reached for my arms. I slashed at them but there were too many to destroy. They held me, locking me in place. I growled, a menacing and direct threat to the demon who so dared grab me, even if that demon was composed of nothing but roots tangled and twisted into a ridiculous form.

It sputtered and grunted, a clipped voice grinding out from between gnarled roots. I glared at the demon and imbedded my poison claws into its woody flesh. The demon laughed with its thick voice, a sound not at all like the wind as it whispers through the leaves.

"Guffaw little doggie. Scratch and bite and claw, this bark feels no pain. Your poison is water compared to what flows through my trunk." The words were oddly clear after coming from a lipless slit in the visage of the demon.

It tossed me against the ground, slamming my body once, twice, thrice onto the packed earth before lobbing me high into the air to land on my back. I pulled myself up as it reached for me again, slicing the first three feet off the roots that formed its hands. It laughed again, re-shaping its body to accommodate for the lost appendage. The roots twisted and slithered over its body and down its 'arm', like a great many snakes.

With my superior speed I cast myself over its body, slicing off pieces of its hide as I did. I did this multiple times, each time taking more and more, hoping to expose a weakness of the monsters. The sharp tinge of Kagome's scent hit me, tearing away my focus. She was moving away. I scented the air for a direction but was met with confusion. The demon was manipulating the forest wind, changing directions often enough so as to scatter her scent and steal my attention. It hit me with a club of roots, sending me careening through several trees to rest at the foot of a mighty Cyprus.

I laid for a moment as the demon stalked toward me. I glowered at the demon, my eyes flashing red. I felt the takeover begin before the sword to my hip pulsed, calming me immediately. _Tensuiga._

I gripped the handle of the blade and drew it, the thin metal soundless. The sword pulsed once more and I followed its movements, allowing it to guide my body. I jumped straight up into the air, twisting and landing for but a moment before I launched forward once more, aiming my Tensuiga at the demon. It didn't bother trying to dodge the blade, ignorant of the history and power of the blade that doesn't cut; doesn't kill.

I sliced across the demons gnarled face and down its chest. It stopped for a moment then uttered a high, wild scream. The roots shriveled and its body froze, posing the roots in wild contortions. The face of the demon froze in its savage cry and the forest grew still.

"Aokigahara, curses you." The demon breathed out as several dark spirits whispered out of the tree roots, steaming out of the wood and dissipating off into the sky. The roots became less evil, their dark air reverting back to that of a regular tree. The wind in the forest returned to normal and I could sense Kagome getting further away once again _._

' _One down. Who knows how many buds this demon has managed to make._ _Aokigahara, The forest demon. Named for the deaths of the mortals who seek out its sturdy branches. The Suicide Forest. What could tempt such a well fed demon to attack so freely now? '_

X*****X

Shoot, scream, dodge, run some more. That was my day so far. My arrows barely scratched the demons back, sticking into its woody flesh and leaving small handfuls of purified wood where there was once only evil; when I got the chance to aim and shoot that was. The demon was persistent, its energy ever restored by the rations in the trunks of the many trees that made up its body, giving me no respite to calculate a plan. But then even that won't be enough to nourish him, and sooner or later it will tire, and I'll be dead. A forest like this demands blood. Any blood. My blood.

The demon's breathing was ragged, but not from the chase. It was laced with joy and with a primal need to catch me, to win the game of cat and mouse. I stopped long enough to take several deep breaths when the demon roared, long and loud. The game got serious. The jewel in its chest pulsed several times, spewing tarnished, black energy into the demon. It roared again, its voice deepening and twisting. The leaves upon its spiked and jagged back turned black and brittle, snapping off in withered and worn shapes. The purification I exorcized over the trees was tainted beyond recognition and my arrows turned black from the corruption. The wood of its body looked charred and moldy, losing the luster the once oiled wood contained. In all, it was corrupt, from the beautifully horrifying demon it was to this monster the jewel has made it. Its eyes looked at me from lightless sockets. The red orbs had turned from menacing to nothing; the absence of light was startling and gave the creature a puppet like look. Like a black hole, the demon seemed to drain the light from its surroundings. The sky went dark and the land withered away. I foresaw my death in this creatures lightless eyes. There was no fighting this. There was no wild plan for winning, there was nowhere left to run. I felt my hope die in my chest, my will to fight leaving my body. I was not peaceful as I thought I would be. I was not ready to die. I was not okay with it. I had so many regrets, so many things and people I wanted to see and speak to. My courage was dashed, and I was alone. It grinned its ugly grin.

X*****X

The ground erupted in a spray of dirt and chunks of grass before I could reach her. Aokigahara slammed his weighty foreleg down on Kagome, shattering the earth. I felt the take-over instantly, my demon ripping out of my human skin. I screamed at the inhuman demon, startling it as I landed on its back. I ripped it off Kagome, leaving her lying at the bottom of a large crater, her face hidden behind a layer of dust and dirt and her own hair. I risked a glance at Kagome for a sign of life, a relieved smile, an apologetic look, an angry glare. My chest tightened when she didn't even move. Aokigahara rumbled and I turned my back on her.

While I enjoyed the handicap of having a larger physical size, the demon outweighed me by several tonnes, proving to be the better advantage. I clawed at him with bloodied paws, ignoring the razor sharp tree spears stabbing and slicing cleanly and deeply through my feet. It reared back and tossed me like I was nothing. I landed on my feet and winced, the pads of my paws throbbing from the many cuts I sustained. I could smell the disturbing scent of my own blood soaking into the ground; nourishing the millions of Aokigahara's roots beneath my very feet. I could faintly feel the roots wiggling like worms, ecstatic for the metallic liquid.

"I was old before you were suckling at your mother's teat you insolent cur. You really think you can take on the might of a thousand trees? The wrath of the forest and survive? You are too weak." I felt his voice through my feet, felt it reverberating in my body. The forest has spoken, and not in my favour.

My mind went red with rage as the demon slowly slid sideways towards Kagome, stomping its feet with every step. A threat. I felt my muscles coil, felt the poison in my blood heat and drip mercilessly from my jaws. The liquid pooled on the ground, burning its way down to the roots suckling at my blood; its deadly vapor ascending into the surrounding air. Aokigahara opened its mouth in a grin as he turned with a surprising speed and charged me before I could attack;

"Surprise puppy. You want venom? Try mine."

He opened his massive jaws and grabbed my shoulder, pinning me beneath his bulk and razor sharp talons. My mind went blank as his toxins leeched into my body, infecting my whole system. I yelped in surprise and whined in pain, a surprising sound I didn't know I was able to make and tried to buck him off. He neither moved nor showed any notice of my movements. I slowly went limp as the venom hit my nervous system, and had no choice but to let him do as he would.

"There, isn't that better? Now be a good dog and wait for my poison to take effect. You may feel some discomfort, but who wouldn't when they're dying?" His voice was like two stones grinding together, marbled and almost incomprehensible.

His voice seemed to die away as he continued to describe the horrors I would face within the next few minutes to hours. Hallucinations, visions of what could have been, what will never be and what will never happen in my reality; pounding heart and cold sweating, convulsions and comatose. Only then, would he actually let me die; a death as slow as the winter crawls by.

"It is nothing personal, little demon, but the infectious will of the jewel. The desire for your death and the girl; I feel the longing to spill your blood in my own heart, and I will oblige. Fear not, she will not go to waste in a forest; she will become one with me!"

He stood up on his hind legs. Thousands of roots sprouted out of the ground and wriggled about his head. He gave a great roar and the roots all dove down towards Kagome like little barb tipped arrows.

I forced my feet beneath my body with a grand push of effort and forced myself up howling, surprised at the panic I felt; like a common mongrel worried about its owner's safety. I stood on my shaky legs like a newborn pup, unable to take more than a few steps without losing balance. My tongue hung out of my mouth as a strip of leather, dry and cracked. His poison worked fast. I fell back to my side in a sudden spasm, returning to my hidden in plain sight human form by default.

"Damnit." I swore when the convulsion ended and spit out a wad of blood. ' _My blood._ ' I forced myself up once more, trying to stare the mighty beast down with sensitive and blurred eyes; trying to see Kagome.

' _He is too fast in my true form, but maybe I could outrun him in this one.'_

"Determined dog." He bared his bloodied fangs and slammed a paw down over me. I dodged it by the skin of my teeth and landed hard on my feet and hands; crouched and ready.

He made a move to attack once more but flicked his attention suddenly back to Kagome, growling. The darkness in its eyes seemed to narrow into a thin beam aimed in her direction, sucking the light out of the world.

I glanced sideways at Kagome, at her shimmering body, at the dome of bright light that surrounded her and held the roots out. I flinched as the thick demon shifted, driven to Kagome. I yelled and stood tall, poised and ready. He turned suddenly and swished his tail across me, knocking me over with the crushing saplings. The bark on the trees was molted and infected, a thick plaque slick to the touch as it hit me.

I was launched backwards, landing on a dense matt of grass. It felt thick and clingy, growing over my body the longer I laid there. My other senses told me it was not real, that the grass was just that, grass, but my eyes betrayed that sense. It grew over my legs and arms and chest, slithering and swirling until the grass was faceless vines, hugging me and holding me still.

' _Poison. It is poison. It isn't real. Kagome.'_

I panicked a moment before I ripped myself free of the vision, my heart pounding and my chest heaving. I looked for Kagome with a measure of difficulty as my eyes wouldn't focus. I saw her standing in a veil of light with her hands poised over her head, black hair strewn behind her. She looked at me with steel eyes, determined and ready. She nodded. It wasn't Kagome.

How I could mistake this woman for Kagome was understandable. My current condition made even breathing a near impossible feat let alone distinguishing the woman I love from a near lookalike. But that was the extent of their similarities. This woman's face was not gentle like Kagome's, nor was the look in her eyes. She was a warrior, no matter how much she resembled a regular priestess. She carried a blade that held magnificent power and her armour was blood and gore spattered. She was as different to Kagome as I was to Jaken.

I grunted in pain, as I stood. Aokigahara smashed his feet down on the veil of light, frustration welling up in his lightless eyes. The woman only held her pose and fended off the giant's swings. I cracked a smile in her direction and then hunched over as a burst of lightning coursed through my body, searing my lungs and leaving my hands and arms numb.

' _I am going to die. I can feel it.'_

I looked towards Kagome as I fell forward, my once clear eyes foggy and dull. I huffed a few times, trying to take breaths that just weren't there; trying to fill lungs that were too full of holes to absorb anything. The ground opened up and swallowed me whole as the sky filled with the sweet sound of Kagome's laughter and the alluring memory of her warm body against mine.

X*****X

 _ **If you are wondering, it was deadly nightshade I was describing as Aokigahara's toxin. I didn't make it [all] up, unless google lied to me. But would google do that? Aha.**_

 _ **I promise it will end soonish. I said that so many chapters ago. The end is near! Ish.**_


	37. part 37

Part 37

X*****X

"Sesshomaru!"

His eyes were so dim and lidded. I could tell he was not well. His shoulder where the demon grabbed him was shredded and stained red and black with blood and poison. I could see it beneath his skin, around his eyes and face; the black webbing of corruption. I choked on my own words when he fell and rose no more, tremoring on the ground and labouring to breathe.

"I have to get to him. I have to get to him! We have to help him, he's dying!" I glanced up, still mesmerized by the radiance and presence of Midoriko, the woman who formed the Shikon Jewel herself, but terrified all the same. She appeared out of the nothing and wove a protective web over me, purifying the woody tentacles as they touched my skin; as they tried to pierce my body with their impurity. This was no longer a battle of the living realm, but of two spirits pulled from the gem they have inhabited for many, many years. We were just two helpless mortals doomed to ride the tide these spirits left in their wake. Would anything be left of us when the water settled?

She glanced at the demon Magasuhi had possessed; the once stationary and solitary forest that prayed on the weakness and mortality of men, consuming their flesh and blood as they died beneath the boughs of its trees. His 'skin', or rather the trees creating his body were darkening, flaking and chipping in places that once held nothing but strength. The jewel's corruption and taint was spreading, leaving the demon sickly and dark. He wasn't even able to realize he was slowly being eaten away; eaten away until nothing was to remain.

"I will help your demon friend, Kagome, bearer of the jewel. But in return, I need something from you."

"Yes! Yes, anything! Just help him please!" I cried at her, absent mindedly running my hands through my hair.

She didn't tell me what as she drew her blade, dropped her light shield, and threw herself at the massive forest demon.

X*****X

I stood alone in a field, bare of everything but grass and the sweet scent of flowers and a nearby spring. I couldn't see either. The sky was a cloud of mist, surrounding and cloaking me. I took several long steps forward, unfazed by the queer setting. The mist parted slightly to reveal a line of trees on the horizon; a line that seemed to reach for me even as I walked towards it. The mist followed me into the branches, leeching a cool dampness that seemed to penetrate everything; the wood, the soft undergrowth and the fertile soil.

"Do you yet have someone to protect?"

I stopped and focused my gaze on a hooded figure, draped in a cloak of mist and drenched in a familiar scent; father. I didn't answer his century old question; the very question he posed to me many times before.

"You have been running for so long, waiting for me to answer all your questions. Don't you ever tire, waiting for a ghost? Would you want to listen now, even if I were to answer?"

He chuckled at his own question, bristling me. I felt my chest tighten; felt my heart speed up.

"What? Have nothing to say to your own father? Nothing at all? I seem to recall a young pup, hardly fit to hold a sword in his virgin hands seeking me out, demanding answers to questions, demanding a fight for superiority. What happened to him? Is he afraid of a ghost?"

"You are dead. MY father is dead. The answers you have are not the answers I want." I bit my tongue, preventing a volley of words from pouring out. ' _He died. This figment is not my father.'_

"Yes. Yes I am, but just because I am dead, doesn't mean it isn't me. I charged you with the protection of my pup. I see it in your eyes, Sesshomaru. He changed you. What you feel now, the fear, the pain." He gave a knowing grin, eyes flashing. "Love. To think, my first born, my eldest son, has inherited some of my, as your mother would put it, more odd characteristics. It took me longer to see such follies in my own character than it did you, but you do not wish to feel them, am I correct?"

"This banter and idle chatter do not interest me, _father_. I have done as asked without obligation, taking care of your Halfling. And you presume to know me. You never were as interested in me as you were with him. Do not pretend to know me, nor what makes up my noble being. I let him live. I can just as easily destroy him." I let my tone go icy as I started to sidestep the manifestation.

He matched my voice with his own, full of indifference and an unfounded rage. "You dare threaten what is mine? You speech well, son, but I can see through you. Easy is a matter of speaking. Killing Inuyasha would be as hard as killing your human mate Kagome. You are not as strong as you pretend to be. You are changed."

"They mean nothing." I lied through my teeth, knowing his verbal skills far surpassed mine. I never was one to enjoy the talking.

"They mean everything! This change is for the better, Sesshomaru; though it has come at the worst possible time. You are on a path that will not last. Your heart is destined to forget, to revert back to its original path in time and your mind will crack and break. Your body may heal, but the mind can't mend on herbs and will to survive alone. You said it so yourself, you can tempt fate, but you can't change it."

I felt myself darken. "What are you saying? You speak in riddles, dancing around a greater truth. Just speak what you mean."

He smirked, "I've seen the end, and one must die for the others to live. Its how it has been, and how it shall be, for future, and past. So it is, and it shall come to pass."

"Speak what you mean and mean what you speak!" I yelled at him.

"There isn't much time. Destiny controls the past as it does the future. Fate and destiny. Light and dark. Both are one in the same, and both are intertwined in this story Sesshomaru; as they are in the next. Past and future are only separated by time. Time for a demon is never ending; insurmountable. My time ended in tragedy. How will yours be?"

He smiled as he morphed quite suddenly, taking an all too familiar shape.

' _Kagome.'_

She stood there smiling as the world went black and she faded into the nothing, mouthing a few words that had no sound, and therefore no meaning. I sat in the blackness of my psyche for what felt like several long hours after that; thinking, fuming. Wondering, if I should ever wake up again to see my mates warm face; touch her soft skin. Or hear her say my name.

X***X

I was left in the darkness by myself, left to muddle out the meaning behind his words. Take the words at point blank and then turn them inside out and shift them around. There was more to what he said, than just what he had said.

I did not move in all that time. I did not talk. I did not do anything beyond the wandering of my mind, jumping from thought to thought, idea to idea. Waiting. Waiting to die, waiting to live. Or perhaps I am already dead. Maybe this is death, an eternal darkness to relive my life and my father's last words to me as his son; to think about the wrongs and goods and everything between I've done. Yes. That must be it.

' _Don't be such a fool. This is nothing more than a trap; a trap laid by the poison in my blood. Somewhere out there, Kagome still fights. She still lives. I can feel it. And that woman. She is out there. An ally.'_

I thought mainly about my conversation with my father, or rather, the watery imprint I had made of him in my mind. That's all he was; a figment of my imagination.

' _But his words were true. They had to be. They were my own thoughts echoed back to me. They were pieces of me spoken in a voice I longed to hear.'_

Destiny, fate, tempted but never changed. Riddles and half-truths. My heart will forget and my mind will crack? Time and tragedy. Am I to end my life in tragedy, or did he even mean me at all? Is this the fate Kagome was warning me against? For one of us to die, the other will live. So who will make it out of here alive? Kagome, or I? Or does he mean us at all. Maybe it was never our stories that intertwined.

X***X

It started as a light burning in my shoulder, running down my chest like a droplet of water and merging with my abdomen. It morphed into a pulsing sting; stabbing me with every beat of my heart. I could hear the world around me, but I was unable to react to it. Aokigahara continued his relentless rampage upon Kagome and the woman in the white light. He roared and he pounded, he growled and he scratched. It must be the shield of light. I was under it too. The light didn't shatter.

"Foolish, Magatsuhi, very foolish." Midoriko murmured over me as her hands pressed lightly to my chest, exploding the pain into every inch of my being. I tried to growl and flinch away, but my voice and body didn't respond.

"Magatsuhi?"

"The darkness in the Jewel itself."

' _Darkness in the Jewel. Is this the Darkness father mentioned?'_

"The darkness? What is going on?"

"Midoriko?" She didn't respond.

Kagome said nothing for a long moment after. "Can you save him?"

"Atropa Belladonna. Nightshade. It is not a common poison and it has a low survival rate." Her voice was cold, calculating.

"How low?" Kagome whispered, her face pale.

I tried once again to growl but nothing came out.

I could feel it in my chest, my time has come. The pain was at its climax, ripping through me like a shock wave. This was it. ' _Kagome.'_

She didn't answer right away and dodged the question when she did. "I'll do my best Kagome."

X*****X

I watched Midoriko press her hands to Sesshomaru, unsure as to how she was going to help him, just that she promised. She said she would, and so she will. His face was still webbed with black corruption, but his breathing seemed to slow down. Whatever it was he was seeing, he must have come to some sort of relief or acceptance. _Accepting death?_

 _No! Don't talk like that, he will be fine._

I grabbed his hand, squeezing the cold fingers in my sweaty palms. I bit back tears as I looked into his face. "Sesshomaru. I know I've been a jerk. And I know I've made mistakes. Big mistakes. I don't deserve you, and you deserve so much better than me. I would have left me a long time ago. But you didn't. You came back. You came to find me, Sesshomaru."

Midoriko spoke softly in the background. I only half paid attention. "We only have moments left before my shield gives out. Two minutes max."

"But you have to live! Take care of Inuyasha, and Jaken! You have people counting on you, people years and years from now who will look up to you. Please. Wake up."

His face remained passive, as though he was unaware I even spoke to him. His chest gave a violent shudder, heaving deeply and loudly. I grabbed his armour, cracked and blood stained, and lifted him up and away from Midoriko.

"God damn it Sesshomaru please! Don't go and die for me. I'm not worth it! Sesshomaru!" I screamed at his chest.

Midoriko moved to remove Sesshomaru from my grasp. "Kagome. Kagome, he's gone, and we are out of time."

"What? No. No, no, no, no, no Sesshomaru no. Sesshomaru." My eyes were blurred with tears, warm and thick. Time seemed to stop as I stared down at his face, still cracked with the black; calm, as though he would open his eyes any moment and catch me staring at him. "I'm sorry, Sesshomaru."

I stood up next to Midoriko as she counted down from five. I gripped my bow tight; four. I wiped the tears from my cheeks, three. I knocked an arrow and watched Aokigahara, staring deep into the voids of his eyes; two. Midoriko crouched low, her sword held over her head, her eyes lethal; one. The light barrier she erected fell around us as sparks of gold and white. My heart went cold with fear as the demon rumpled his face in rage, and a long, low rumble filled the surrounding hills and valleys with a deep base tone that brought instant goose bumps to my skin.

X*****X

 **Sorry. I'm so sorry. Really, I just forgot. I hate when people just stop updating their stories. Pisses me off. I'm apparently one of them. I'm ending this fast now, no joke. Want maybe 2 more chapters. One would be awesome. This chapter was basically half written. So was the part that follows this;**

 **I have given some previously unknown, or maybe implied details that are important. Firstly, Magasuhi and Midoriko have brought their battle to the living realm when Magasuhi possessed Aokigahara in order to Kill Kagome, and remove her from the role she played in her original timeline. That is basically why Naraku's spell so to speak did not work. Kikyo misread Kagome's illness. She wasn't dying, she was traveling through time. The jewel had other plans for Kagome. Her death! And by her death, Kikyo wouldn't be reborn and he would have nobody to fear. Also, by sending her back, he wants to kill Sesshomaru and remove the threat of his Bakusaiga from Naraku, giving them [both] a guaranteed chance to destroy the lives of our Hero's.**

 **I keep messing up the Sesshomaru I have created and the ~real~ one from the show! I should have made mine more of an ass, then it would have worked better. Oh wells.**

 **But, Sesshomaru is supposed to be unconscious here. Hallucinating. Dying. I don't know if I accomplished anything with the Sesshomaru portion of this chapter. Crap. Fcuk it.  
But for everything else… There is a method to my madness! And that is my reasoning for everything that has happened. **


	38. part 38

Part 38

X*****X  
 _Kagome_

I remember the first time the earth shook; vibrating, shaking the ground beneath my feet. I was five. I remember crying, hugging my father's legs; trying to escape the shaking, angry earth. He told me it was alright, that earthquakes were natural and nothing to be afraid of. He said Japan was well prepared for earthquakes; for the little tremors that that tickled the ground. I laughed. The aftershocks were not as scary, but I just had to remember what he said, and no quake bothered me afterwards. When father died it was my turn to comfort Sota in his first earthquake, and I told him the same thing. I told him this was fathers message, and that he doesn't need to be scared. I remember that. It was one of the last things my father ever taught me; how to not fear earthquakes, to not fear anything really. I was there, in the room when he died. He told me he loved me, mother too. And Sota, though he wouldn't remember, being unborn. Sesshomaru told me he loved me too. Then he died as well. What is it with loving me, and death?

X**X

My life is a dream. Maybe not the kind of dream most girls my age have. While they dream of boys and good grades, friends and families and dream date destinations; I have this. This nightmare. The sky is never bright for long and the monsters parade in a never ending line. There are no grades, no re-do's or normal boys. I'm always seeking a little jewel; the priceless bauble that will bestow ultimate power upon its user. I would give anything to have Sesshomaru back; even wish upon that little Jewel. A wish gone wrong is better than a life with no love, is it not? Maybe not.

I stood in fear of the beast before me, aware that this will be the last stand I ever took. I was fully aware that here and now, everything would end. This was it. _I will die._ _But, I'm okay with it? Yes, I'm okay with dying here._

I just want to take this, this bastard down with me. My revenge. _The only thing I can give you, Sesshomaru._

I pulled back my bow and stood shoulder to shoulder with Midoriko. I aimed a shot at the demon, releasing the arrow with a sharp snap at the same moment she bounded high into the air and sliced down its front. The monster screamed in rage, though was hardly more fazed than a horse bitten by a fly. My arrows have little power. My heart just isn't in it anymore. _Midoriko, you're on your own in this one. I can't._

Annoyed, but not hurt, it slapped its massive paw across the sky, catching Midoriko and smashing her back into the dirt. He then drew his clawed paw across the battle worn ground towards me, leaving Midoriko laying in a heap. I screamed and aimed another sloppy shot, missing by a large margin as I was ripped backwards and dropped in the dirt. Like a frightened child, I started to cry.

X*****X  
 _Sesshomaru_

Kagome was crying. Screaming. Yelling. _What was she yelling about? I'm not gone? I'm here. Right here. Did I look dead? I feel dead._

But death doesn't have thoughts. Therefore, if I was dead, I wouldn't hear her sweet voice; smell, taste, or feel anything. His poison is wearing off? It must be. Does that mean it is not as strong as he so thinks? He is weak. His body is not stronger than mine. This body, my body. It's the ultimate weapon. I will kill him. And he will know the rage that comes with harming my mate. I will rip him to splinters.

My breathing increased rapidly, lungs expanding and contracting- forcing massive volumes of air through my body. I tensed my muscles, clenching my teeth as I felt my skin start to burn. The poison poured out of the wounds in my shoulder, staining the ground with blood and venom and infection alike. My heart pounded with more confidence and I could feel my body already knitting the skin back together. In a few hours, it will be as though I was never hurt. Except for the tear in my precious white linens. That is irreparable- definitely not self-healing.

My eyes opened at the same time Kagome opened her mouth to scream and lightning fast, as I always am, I was tugging her back onto the ground. I expected her to cry. I knew she would. She curled into herself, hugging her arms to her chest and leaned forwards, her forehead to her knees. Her tears fell in fat drops to the dirt and her cries were silent. She was freaking out, and I was loving every moment of it. This will show her for doubting me, for running away from me. For treating me as she has. I am not always going to be there, and now she knows what it is to be without me.

"Kagome," She glanced over at me. "I was wrong. I once said only time can take away the pain of your memory, of losing you. But even in death, I see your face."

She looked up at me, "Kagome. Do you want me or not?"

She nodded her head; yes.

"Then consider your actions and bask in the shame that brought us to this point. Know how it is to be alone and afraid. But also know, that I would come back again and again, even if it meant facing death to see you once more."

I spoke without ever taking my eyes off of her- knowing that the deadliest foe I've faced thus far was standing just a leap away. "Find Jaken. Find Inuyasha. Leave, and don't come back for me. I will find you."

I gave her no chance to answer. I pointed at Midoriko and, with an understanding incomprehensible by words, transformed into my demon form. My red eyes glowed with a sharp and clear intensity—a careful and silent rage. Kill. This was it. It is him or me.

I tackled the beast, using his own weight to my advantage and ripped it right off of its feet. I bit and gnawed at the trees forming its back and legs- carving off great chunks of wood and blackened, diseased timber. The taste of the wood on my sensitive tongue was just about as bad as the poison, but I persevered. I know I am impervious to his toxins. I am stronger than a whole forest.

I roared and sharpened my claws on his back, twisted around before he could grab me and gouged his face. I left deep gashes across his lifeless eye—the black, disturbing eye. My demonic aura billowed in a ravenous delight, clouding everything in a sharp cloak of swirling white energy. The adrenaline of it all. The sweet tingle of power. Not even the black energy of this Magatsuhi could be seen beneath my cloak. I sunk my teeth deep into Aokigahara, ripping his head back and exposing his neck and chest. He gave a roar of panic and Midoriko took her own shot then, reading the fight well enough to give her the best, and most destructive, blow. A shock wave sent me flying backwards, hindquarters over-head, feet flailing and sky spinning. It was a short lived victory.

X*****X  
 _Kagome_

Sesshomaru told me to go. Midoriko told me to go. Why don't I ever listen? I watched the battle from a rise in the earth. It was a nearly flat expanse of rocks with a nook just large enough for me to wedge myself into. It had a clear view of the battle field as well as a clear path should I need to run. It was the perfect place. Why did I ever leave it?  
I stepped out of hiding to watch Sesshomaru. His eyes, the way his body moved. He changed. He was fighting stronger, harder. It is like something inside of him was awakened and he is fighting with more heart than before. Something happened in comatose.

I followed his movements with my eyes, perfectly in sync with his attacks. Midoriko flashed a pale gold and rose into the sky, her sword held like a delicate flower, though I knew it was definitely not. She could decapitate a flea, should that flea choose to offend her that is.

An explosion like a thunder clap in a large echoing room tore apart my ears. I, like Sesshomaru, was sent flying backwards into the ruined fields of rock and gravel and bloody dirt. A sharp pain filled my shoulder and ribs and then dulled to nearly nothing.

Midoriko fluttered to the ground with a semblance of grace, landing beside my body. She looked at me with such admiration and respect that I was moved to tears, but only able to produce one perfect drop. I choked twice, convulsed once, and fell still, wheezing; only minuscule amounts of air entering my body. The following exchange lasted only a second or two, but it felt like forever, dragging on and on.

Midoriko continued to glow, turning a beautiful shade of lilac. Her voice was softer than before, more intimate. "You have done well, Kagome. Fate has been in your favour once more. Magasuhi, while not dead, has been purged from this once lovely and sentient forest to take his place in the jewel once more."

Midoriko held her hand out to me, though I didn't want to take it. I tried to shake my head no, but something inside told me yes. Her face was the last thing I saw before our hands connected.

X*****X

 _Sesshomaru_

I stood over her, feeling things I would never forget. I picked up the Jewel, its surface ever changing the longer it was next to Kagome. From a pure, almost white light it faded to a dull pink. Its significance I did not know, but the pure light was gone; as was she.

I spoke no words aloud to her. I knew she wouldn't hear them even if I did. They would be comforting no one, only increasing the despair I felt deep in my heart. Then I heard it.

"Lord Sesshomaruuuu! Lord Sesshomaru! Ah there you are Mi'lord." Jaken fumbled across the rocks, an unhappy and pouty Inuyasha in tow.

He muttered the whole walk, something about wanting to help. How he could have helped. My heart clenched and I could feel silent rage building inside.

"We decided to follow you. Couldn't let my Lord go into battle alone could I?" Jaken puffed up; like a toad in looks and in strength.

"I could have helped. But you leaved me behind. You always leave me behind." Inuyasha looked at the remains of the demon, fear pouring off him, like it would jump up and grab him.

I turned sharply, my eyes red and my teeth pointed- a partial takeover. I advanced on Inuyasha, grabbing him by the neck and growling in his face, as much to him as to Jaken. "Yes and you would be dead. Just like Kagome. Is that what you want? To fight a fruitless fight and come out the winner with nothing to left?" I dropped him.

I pointed finger at Jaken next. "And you. You let her go. You let her run away again. If you would have stopped her she would be alive! If you would have followed her, If..." I let my thoughts trial off and turned my back to them.

Jaken looked taken back, but hung his head as though it really were his fault. He made a silent promise then, to never let anything happen to another of Sesshomaru's wards again.

I looked at the place Kagome laid, at the perfect hole in her chest above her heart. A puddle of blood had already formed around her. Her face paled considerably. This was not like my resurrection. She would not open her eyes and smile. She would not tell me this was a cruel joke. I had told her to bask in the shame that brought us to this point; to the point of losing one another. Cruel irony is this, that it is I who should suffer the loss.

"Jaken, do you remember what it was I told you?" His silence was crushing, but I knew he was there. "I wish I could forget her. But only time can heal pain of the heart; I will live for a very long time."

X*****X

 **Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit guys. Shiit. I do NOT I repeat, Not! At all, like how Sesshomaru was** **seemingl** **y re-written into the story. Let me be clear, in case it is not, he did not die! He didn't. It would have been so uncool to kill him, then bring him back, and then kill Kagome as I just did. No. He was alive. Poison makes the body do funny things. He is just so damn awesome he went comatose to hallucinate and fight the poison- they thought he died. And being feudal Japan, can you blame her for assuming so? I've read a few stories of people, long ago, buried alive for that reason. (What a fucking horrible and downright scary way to go.) Madness! This is madness, but it has a method!**

 **Also, I don't say it enough but thank everyone for reading and following and reviewing my story! Really. Whether you liked it or didn't I appreciate each and every review, as well as everyone that reads it! If I wasn't so awkward I would respond to the reviews, but I am awkward so I will give a general, but no less personal, thank-you to everyone!  
**

 **THANK YOU!**


	39. part 39

Part 39- Final

X*****X

 _Kagome_

Madness. Mind numbing and emotionally lacking madness. They always said you saw your life flashing behind your eyes, like a movie. I was skeptical, and was right to be so. It wasn't so much a movie as it was a jumble of images and senses. I knew there was emotion behind the memories, but I couldn't feel them—couldn't remember them. I couldn't feel the pride or the pain or the embarrassment. I was a single person watching the life of someone I once knew. There was no joy, just the memory of what once was. Of what no longer is.

That day I was poisoned by Naraku was the last memory to flash in my head before things got murky, lingering for a second longer than the last memories. Cracks radiating bright red and white light broke out over my eyes. Multi-coloured splotches like paint covered the remainder of my vision and I was seeing things with a different eye. Like it wasn't really my memories, but they were still imprinted in my head. They moved slower than my old life, lingering on moments that were arbitrary or random with no meaning. A shimmering pool of water or a random colour—usually yellows and reds; a brilliant golden eye flashing angry, which is countered by the same eye bright and sharp; happy. The memories seemed to try to remind me what emotions felt like; what joy was versus sadness. Anger versus longing. I forgot almost immediately after the sensation faded.

Midoriko was near me. I could feel her even if I couldn't see her. It was comforting, if that was the word I would have once used, to know she was near. To know that I wasn't completely alone.

I resolved to fixate my memory on the eyes. Ignore the other images. Just see the eyes. Ignore the streak of colour in the grey and white sky. Ignore the voice belittling me from a time long past. I could feel the mate mark on my shoulder heat up, like it was reaching out itself to the eyes; they are connected, I know it. What did I feel looking into these eyes? What was that emotion called? A longing for something or someone I lost a long time ago? Or was it only moments ago? I ignored the once sad images of people I called friends dying, waving to me; watching me. None of these memories means anything anymore, they're just pictures. Only the eyes are frozen in my vision.

"Love Kagome. It was love."

Midoriko. This was the first real voice I heard since, well, since I died. Since that jewel pierced my body and stole my breath.

"Love huh. Why can't I remember what love feels like? I must have felt it, yet I don't feel anything. I'm just. Calm."

"Death does not consume emotion, but neither does death like it. To feel something, anything, is to have regret, and to have regret makes it harder to accept the next step in the afterlife and prolongs the suffering. To alleviate the suffering, emotion is scrubbed from your mind; purified. It is a, tedious, task, but easier than fighting a restless soul." Midoriko materialized, pausing the unrelenting segments of memory.

"Why do these memories make no sense?"

"They aren't meant for you. They were never meant to be yours. And just as you died, the memories are decaying as well."

I nodded my head, becoming aware that I was laying down on a soft floor. Softer than my bed even. I felt it beneath my fingertips but couldn't fully appreciate the material.

"So. What is my next step then?" Even with my emotions scrapped a single tear fell from my eye. I touched it curiously, feeling the wetness of the eye drop. These people. All of them. I may not feel it, but I know they need me. I can see it in my memories. Love. Midoriko said love. They must have loved me, and I them. Cruel is the hand that deals.

"Normally death; the afterlife. But here, you've been in limbo. You died yes. But dead, no you are not. Your state is much like my imprisonment in the Jewel. Unable to move on. Unable to leave, unable to die Kagome. But, I have been watching. Waiting, biding my time. Things have aligned perfectly and you are ready to go home."

"What do you mean? I can just, leave? Skip out on death?"

She didn't answer my questions, only brushed my memories aside, clearing the swirling expanse of sky above me. So much beauty, even in death.

"You have been in limbo for many, many years. When you leave, you will be confused, disorientated. It's normal. The memories of your disappearance will fade and your life will become as ordinary as it is for you once again. Days, weeks, months. It took Sesshomaru moments to fully forget you, but he is a different case. He wished you away, whereas you will have to forget naturally. Don't dwell on it, it won't matter one day."

"Sesshomaru." The name sparked something within my soul, sending a rippling shiver through my gut. My shoulder throbbed simultaneously, sparking a feeling deep inside me. A questionable feeling.

"That's his eyes I saw, isn't it? So this is his mark?" I grabbed my neck absently, noting that the burn I received earlier had faded into nothing. Like it never happened. Curious.

The question was rhetorical of course. I already knew it was true. The night's memory briefly crumbled into my vision before dying away again. He marked me. He loved me. It was passion in his eyes. But why did this mark move onto the afterlife with me, while my injuries faded?

 _He is a part of you now._ Of course. It was so simple.

I took a second to think. Love. She said that what we had was love. My heart beat once. I made a decision then. A quick, though not reckless decision. I don't want to forget. I don't want to forget what we had. What could have been. It's not fair.

"You say he has already forgot me. But I don't want to forget. What can I do?"

"Hold on. You can only hold on. The head is a fickle thing. The heart is not so easily changed, but the mind can be persuaded. Remember him, and remind him of who you are. That's all you can do. Of course his wish still stands, and he may not ever remember. So then is it worth it to remember that which he will not, or would it be better to live in ignorance of your love?"

"Did I at least change anything for the better? Past, or future?"

Midoriko took a deep inhale, "Kagome. The jewel is tricky. When you died he picked it up and absently made his wish. Though, perhaps not intending for it to take place, he wished all he same. 'I wish I could forget her.' The Jewel recognized his desire, and made it true. It stole from him his memories of you, and with it every positive emotion he connected to those memories. Every fleeting emotion he felt when he was with you, and more besides."

"Why would he do that? If he really loved me why forget me and every emotion he had?"

"For him it was easier to forget then to spend the rest of his life remembering. A human life is just a day compared to the span in which he will live. And since when has a wisher upon the Jewel ever had a happy ending? No, it is not all his fault. He is a victim of circumstance, of fate.

"You see, the world has a way of righting itself, of snapping back into its original line like a windblown tree branch. Your death put the world back on track. The past, as you remember it, isn't anything but that, and the future will play out like it is destined to be. It is not necessarily you who changed Sesshomaru into what he is, but what he was always destined to be. Heartless. Cold. Emotionless."

I looked at her with both sad and angry eyes, my chest burning with something unknown. _My feelings are coming back. I can't name them, and I don't want them._

He won't remember me. It's been how many years since I died? I won't remember him, and he will probably be back to his old tricks. Trying to kill us and steal the Tetsuiga. No. Don't say that. Just hold onto him. Brilliant golden eyes, deep and emotional. His voice, his rich deep tones moving and changing. His words, the way they made me feel. Yes, feel. Happy, warm. Loved. Passionate. Whole. Remember him Kagome, remember! That is not who he is! That is not who this man is!

"I'm sorry it had to be this way Kagome. I truly am." Midoriko spread her hands out wide, inviting the sky down to our level. It spread around us, soaking into my skin, entering my mouth and weighing me down. It was a paralyzing feeling, but not scary. It was more, heavy. Like a burdened mind or a tired limb, only it was my entire being. The core of what made me, well, me. I was dragged down deeper into the mystic waters, and with each second I choked a little more. With each second the spiritual lights of limbo faded. With each second, I lost a little more of Sesshomaru's loving memory.

X***X

I took a deep, choking breath, drowning in the air and spitting out the mystic water that wasn't there. I coughed several times before throwing up into my mouth. I tried to turn my head to the side but it didn't help much. I couldn't roll to my side, weak as my body was, and I only choked more.

My eyes were dazzled by the bright light overhead, and it was impossible to open them for more than a few seconds. Voices swarmed me, buzzing in my ears and over my face. It was all so overwhelming. Hands gripped my arms and pushed me onto my side, harshly. I spit the bile out and took a quick shallow breath, letting tears leak out of my tightly shut eyes. Quick hands wiped my mouth and throat with a damp cloth, cleaning me up a little bit.

The lights slowly returned to normal and the voices took on distinctive tones. I recognized Inuyasha immediately, followed by Shippo, Sango and Miroku. Two recognizable, yet highly odd, voices also spoke in the background. Koga and Kikyo.

I blinked away the stars and looked up at my friends. _My friends? They're here._

"Kagome? How are you feeling?"

Oh Sango. How I missed your voice. How I missed having my closest friend. More tears came to my eyes and I wiped them away with a smile.

"I'm okay now."

A chorus of voices admonished me when I sat up, glancing around quickly for something. What that something was, I wasn't sure. I lingered my gaze on Inuyasha, his face. His eyes. Yellow; gold. Gold! Remember the eyes, bright and happy, sharp and angry. The brilliant golden eyes. Not Inuyasha's eyes.

He looked at me with a questionable expression, and I'm sure my gaze was as alarming. Guilty. I stood up, bringing on another round of astonishment from my friends. "No really, I feel fine."

Inuyasha stared at me with the gaze of a man who lost everything. His eyes held a fine film of tears, unfallen, though threatening to do so.

"Damn Kagome. You scared me so bad. I thought I lost you." His voice cracked but took on a slightly harder edge. He looked away from me, frowning.

"I know. But I'm back, and I'm alive, and I'm fine." I wrapped my arms around him and buried my face in his chest. He returned my hug and gripped me tighter after only a moment. It was nice, to be in his arms, but it didn't feel right. It wasn't like it used to be, when he made my heart flip and my stomach flutter like butterflies. When the mere sight of him sent a current through me; made me feel weak and strong at the same time. I love Inuyasha, but I'm not in love with him. I smiled behind my tears, letting them flow as they would. I don't know what happened, and I'm sure they want answers, but those can wait. Just remember. Recall, think and see.

The golden eyes.

X***X

"And you're sure you don't know what happened?"

I sighed for the last time that night. "No. I don't know anything. Like I already said. It hurt, there was so much pain, so very much pain. And then I woke up to you guys."

"Strange. Very strange." Kikyo murmured as she scooted closer to Inuyasha, her brows furrowed in thought.

"I agree. If it is as you say, Lady Kikyo, and Kagome did disappear, what happened while she was away to bring her back?" Miroku glanced around the fire, looking from eyes to eyes. I choose not to meet the look.

We have been arguing in circles for hours. They asked me my story several times, asking for reassurances and more details than I was able to provide. I don't remember anything. I remember nothing but the eyes. That was my only clue to answers. But I'm not telling them that. I stole a look at Kikyo and Inuyasha, only to feel my cheeks flush when he was looking at me first. I swallowed hard, unsure as to what I was feeling about this.

Koga shifted to my right, though he stayed a respectable distance away, glancing at me with a look of worry, wonder and fear. "But she is back now, so does it really matter where she was? I think we have been talking long enough and she needs sleep. We have more pressing matters besides, like finding Naraku and killing him. He could tell us what he did to her." This sparked another round of debate. The circle continues.

"We need details while they're fresh."

"We don't know what will happen if she goes to sleep. Maybe she will disappear again, and why would Naraku tell us anything…?"

I stood up without speaking a word, glaring at Koga when he moved to follow me. He, surprisingly, sat back down without a word. I disappeared into the trees. Wherever I was, it doesn't matter. I don't remember, and their prodding will never help it. Wherever I was, whatever happened, something changed inside me. Even if I don't remember it, I feel it. My friends, their concerns. It almost bothers me. Subconsciously, it's like I don't want them to care; like they're not who I want.

A deep ache, a longing deep inside me flared up. It was like my heart stopped beating. And it is all because of that blasted pair of eyes.

"Kagome?" Inuyasha approached me slowly, choosing to stand several yards off. I didn't respond.

"Are you alright? You seem, not yourself."

"You noticed too did you? Here to ask me for more details? I didn't think you cared, seeing how you were too cuddled up to Kikyo to pay too much attention." That was harsh. I don't love him, so why does his choice of female companionship matter to me? And of course he cares. He is my best friend. _'Because if I'm not happy, no one should be.'_

"Kagome that's not fair. Of course I care. And Kikyo. That's something I wanted to talk to you about." His voice was quiet, his eyes downturned.

"Inuyasha," I turned to him, closing the gap between us. I noticed the way he seemed to crouch down as I approached. "That is none of my business who you choose. I know you love Kikyo and I know you care. I'm just frustrated, I'm tired, and I'm... Never mind. You don't have to explain your feelings to me; you don't have to justify anything to me. I'm your friend after all, aren't I?"

I offered him a small smile, taking his hand in my own.

"Yeah. My best friend. Without you I. I don't know where I would be. Still stuck to that basted tree I suppose. I'm sorry."

"I'm not. I would give anything to do it again and end with the same outcome. Maybe less hostility. But I don't want you to feel like you have to censor yourself around me. I love you, but I'm not in love with you." I stared into his 'not my golden eyes'. He smiled, one of the smiles he saved only for me. "I'm happy for you."

Even if I really didn't feel like it.

He nodded once before turning around, pulling me back towards the fire. I dropped his hand then with a sadness in my eyes. He turned to look at me. He wasn't looking me in the eyes. "You aren't coming back with me are you?"

I shook my head. "No. I have to go. I have to…"

"You're going to find him aren't you?"

"Find him? Who?" I tried to play dumb. Inuyasha is a lot more aware then I ever gave him credit for. He knows. Koga does too. They knew since I came back. From wherever I was.

He pulled the collar of my shirt down, revealing the thin scar by my neck. A perfect row of teeth, top and bottom, rimmed my collar. I pretended not to know it was there.

"I don't know where you went, and I believe you when you say you don't remember. But this? You can't hide this. I'm not stupid, I never knew my father and never knew the mechanics of my demon blood, but I know what a mate mark is. You even smell like him. You changed."

A vivid memory flared in my eyes. Passion, lust. Pain, a thick voice growling with pleasure. Sesshomaru. "They're Sesshomaru's eyes. Aren't they? In my memory." _Remember Sesshomaru._

"So then this is his mark? This mate mark?" I felt my cheeks burn hotter than ever, having a name and a face associated with the scar. So we… That is Sesshomaru and I… We had...

"I wish I knew what was happening inside your head Kagome. Did he force you? Was this your choice to…? You know. Did you want this?" He placed his forehead against mine, wrapping his hand around the back of my neck in a comforting gesture. "Talk to me. I can help. I know I can. You don't have to do this alone."

Inuyasha closed his eyes and nodded to me as I spoke, whispering. "I don't know if you can. I remember nothing. I have nothing but a few segments of memory. But, I have to find him. He might hold more answers. Where is he? Just tell me that."

"I'm sorry it had to be this way, Kagome."

Inuyasha stepped back once, twice, his eyes meeting mine for the first time. He pointed directly east, the complete opposite of our camp.

"He's coming."

X*****X

 _Sesshomaru_

That scent. That scent and the blood, mixed with the rag tag group of miscreants I know so well. I supressed my rage, involuntarily flexing the muscle in the severed remains of my arm. The scent of the night folded and warped among the breeze, bringing odours and sounds anew. It wasn't as though her scent was intoxicating. In fact it was the opposite. It is the same as any other humans—the mortality, the disgusting tinge of sub-par blood. But, not today. Today, it has changed. Why, I do not understand. In fact I would say it grew stronger in these last few hours then it's ever been. This scent is unmistakable though, unmistakably familiar and unique. In fact it is so rare it is 100 percent unique. It is… Impossible. She smells like me.

I turned my back on Jaken and Rin, choosing to wander towards the scent that draws me so. It was curious. I was curious. There is only one way her blood could have gained my scent and the idea is laughable. Mating with a human—the only plausible explanation besides a curse or worse. Then again no one would dare to curse me.

Naraku can wait. I've made my decision. His trail has gone cold since his last appearance anyway; no doubt waiting for his latest scheme to take place so I heard. Kagura, while not an ally of mine, was an infallible source of information. The details were not fourth coming and she fled before I could ring them from her. And now I wait for him to resurface. My time is free. And now it has a purpose. Inuyasha's wench. What is this curse that marks her as mine? Is this Naraku's plot, to curse her while targeting me? I will not be used by a half demon with a lust for power. Naraku or not, I will dispose of this curse. I will make sure that this stain upon my blood it taken care of, and I will destroy the man responsible for the atrocity. It is so simple. My destination is clear.

I must kill her.

X*****X

 _Kagome_

What did he just say? I remembered a voice speaking, softly and sadly. _I'm sorry it had to be this way Kagome._

A woman's voice. Her name escaped me, but her words echoed the same as Inuyasha's. Sadly, releasing me out into a big world for a small girl. She did it. This woman took my memories. Memories of what? Of Sesshomaru? I never wanted to forget, I know that.

I hurried away from Inuyasha, my heart jumping and my mind working. The eyes, the memories. The pain. I could see some of it, like looking through frosted glass, but the content was too distorted to see clearly. Shapes and colours.

I stopped running just outside a small glade. A simple, elegant pond wound between trees and bushes alike. It was even more beautiful up close. A small stream poured smoothly over a bed of rock and down into a deep pocket of crystal clear water. Several little fish circled the dark falls, drawn in by the splashing liquid. Small bugs blinked from the trees, flashing and giving a magical feel to the otherwise scary dark. The very scary dark.

The trees surrounding the little haven were mighty and thick, like a wall between me and the real world. I stood before the pool with a mixed feeling; something between a deep rooted loss and a vague recognition, like I had seen this place before. I stared at the pool for a moment before I noticed there was a being across the water. I was not alone. He was looking at me as intensely as I stared at the water, his eyes filled with something that radiated darkness. He lifted his lip in a snarl and lunged at me, pinning me to a tree several feet behind.

X*****X

 _Sesshomaru_

It was so easy to lose my head, but harder to justify a reason for it. I had been sitting by the pond for a while, staring listlessly into the water. I know this pond. Perhaps I passed it before, or perhaps it is similar to the multitudes of springs dotting the land. But the scents. It doesn't smell familiar.

When I saw her, everything I thought and decided was instantly forgotten about. Restraint. Questions and answers. Simple decency to let her say her piece before I ripped her throat out. Then again what were answers? They wouldn't change the fact that she has my scent. That her blood has mixed with mine. No, her death is unavoidable. I tacked her to a tree, pressing the ultimatum of her situation; answer me or perish.

A flash of memory blinded me, silencing my rage.

Kagome whispered a plea. "Sesshomaru, please?"

I felt the cold grips of fear chill my bones. This is something I only felt once before, and then it was only a hitch in my movements. This time it was a persistent thought; feeling. It was the same fear I attached to Rin after all these days we spent together; the fear of seeing her dead. But Kagome was dead. I saw it. I was there. Also impossible.

I didn't step back, but neither did I press her deeper into the tree. It was a forceful, intimidation stance, but when have I ever been otherwise?

"Speak, and speak quickly."

Contrary to my expectations, she didn't shake or quiver. She took a deep breath, her voice steady.

"Believe me. Just, let me explain." But she said no more. She pulled down her collar, revealing a shiny row of scarred skin; not just any scar. My mark. That, is definitely my mark.

X*****X

 _Kagome_

What words can express this topic to a murderous demon? How does one pose this revelation; to reveal that, even though we don't remember, we were together for a night? There are no words, there are none. And when words fail, a picture is worth a thousand. I showed him the mark. If Inuyasha knows, then for sure Sesshomaru knows. No doubt. In fact, his face revealed that fact, but it revealed more.

His eyes widened a fraction and he leaned back slightly.

"Impossible." His voice was stoic as ever, but I could see it, deep within his eyes. Confusion. Torment. Shock; probably some agony over a human bearing his mark. Being his mate.

I shivered at the term. I know from Inuyahsa's past that his father ran off with a human, obviously ran from Sesshomaru's mother, so the bond isn't necessarily confined to one woman. But no matter what happens. I am marked. I am forever mutilated by the fact that I am Sesshomaru's. If I live that is.

"You don't remember either. Do you?"

"I see… memories. Distant. But they can't be mine." He hasn't stopped staring at me, his gaze intensifying and heating.

"Well, I see your eyes. Not like this; angry and dark. They're softer. Happier." I tried to smile. "I didn't want to forget. It must have been special, you know. What we had."

I gave a half smirk, but his gaze didn't change. If anything his eyes narrowed slightly, becoming more intense. He still looked at me with suspended anger. Dangerous as ever.

"We'll never remember will we? I wish I could just forget this now."

X*****X

 _Sesshomaru_

I reached out and grabbed her arm, tighter than I had meant to. Those words. Not exact, but they were like a nightmare come to life. I made that same wish. I wish I could just forget. Forget. Forget what? This? I felt my mask crack, letting the emotion I had built up for years flow through—the emotions I told myself I didn't have. What did I wish away? What am I missing? What did I lose?

I pressed my eyes shut, finally unable to take the sad way Kagome was staring at me. Like she pitied me. But not just me; she pitied the both of us.

So calm she was, standing here. Like it was natural for her to be this close to me. Any other time she would have been dead long before she could speak the words she did.

Without my eyes I was hyper aware of her scent. It was like many humans, but from this proximity I could scent the difference. She was cleaner, sweeter; almost artificial like the fragrant scents many female demons use to charm their victims. Then there was me. Mixed in like a blend of spice. It was hard to identify my own smell, but it was there, like a hint of danger in an innocent glade.

And suddenly, the answer was clear. Suddenly I was facing a sea of thoughts and memories and emotions I had to sort through. The right ones were there. To say that they belonged to me would be accurate, but to say I felt anything for them would be a lie. In fact, I can see what I've been missing. I see it plain as day in my memories, permeated with her face. With her scent, and her voice. But I feel nothing for it.

"I loved you."

X***X

It was a simple thing to admit, but to feel it was another. I just don't feel anything anymore.

"I wished I could forget you. And I did. And now I don't feel anything."

It was actually horrifying. To know I had love. I have it, right here in front of me. The proof is in the mark, the mark I left on my mate. Mine. But I don't feel anything. Angry maybe. Angry at myself for wishing her away. Angry at her, for dying and leaving me like she did. For coming back and being so… Her. But mostly, I am angry at the memories I can't guarantee are even mine. But then again, they have to be. I am angry that I can't feel anything, even knowing I saw her die, and knowing it hurt me so deeply I wished her away.

"Tell me something you remember." Her look was almost begging.

"You died. Right in front of me. I couldn't do anything." I tried put a semblance of emotion into my voice, but the look on her face told me it didn't work.

"And, do you still love me?" Her face was terrible at masking emotions. Her eyes were bright and hopeful, her hands wrapped up in her skirt.

"No."

She turned away, her lip quivering with disappointment. I felt my heart jump for only a moment, but it was enough.

"But, I want to."

 _ **FIN**_

 **To be honest, I wrote and re-wrote this several times over many, many days; on pads of paper, on scraps of papers, napkins, on the computer, in my head, speaking aloud in my truck as I drove to work. I then spent another handful looking it over and over and over and over. And over. But, this is as good as I can get it.**

 **I think I am confident with this one. Leaves that bit of mystery. Like, Sesshomaru needs to remember how to love, Kagome needs to remember why she loved him in return. They need to basically fall back in love based on the memories they have of each other. I think that is cute, personally.**

 **(Read the book Alias Hook by Lisa Jensen—that is kind of where I got the inspiration for the ending. Also it is a compelling book, told from the eyes of James Benjamin Hook. I like the reverse of good/bad guy roles.)**


	40. Epilogue

Epilogue

It wasn't easy to be with a man you didn't remember, nor was it easy to explain the odds of such a relationship. Luckily, I wasn't the one that did the explaining. I traveled with my friends for a long while, visited by Sesshomaru on many, many occasions. We were, awkward. It was awkward. He looked at me with such malice sometimes, and others with what I can only describe as a look of acceptance. Like he could accept that I was just there. But every day was progress. Sometimes he would come to me with a memory so sweet, and other times he could hardly look at me, and I knew it wasn't a, happy memory. But every day was different. Every day was a treat, because I got to see him open up to me in ways I never imagined he could. I got to fall in love all over again, and I know he did too.

The longer we talked, as in the longer I asked questions and got progressively longer and longer answers out of him, the more I remembered. And I did love him. I really did. He spoke with little emotion at first, so his answers didn't really tell me anything. It was plain fact. But eventually I could see the affection in his answers; the love. The raw feelings behind every memory, even if it was anger or hate. But it paid off. Every moment we spent together, sometimes walking in plain silence. Sometimes sitting beside a grassy hill, watching Rin and Shippo run in the grass. But most times just talking, for seconds, then minutes and finally hours. It paid off.

X***X

I wouldn't say it has always been easy, just us together forever and ever. There have been many fights between our groups and us. There have been many arguments and tears and bloody battles. But it's over. It is finally over.

Naraku was put to death over the village where it all started. Funny, since that's fitting as to where it all should end. It was an emotional two years after that, having been torn away from my place in the feudal era. I fulfilled Midoriko's request and wished away the Jewel, setting her free in the process. Inuyasha gave me strength. My friends gave me strength; Sesshomaru, gave me strength. Then it was torn away. I spent the next two years wondering how much was a dream and how much was a hallucination. I spent two years, patting my shoulder, assuring myself that the mark was still there, that it was real; looking into a mirror just to glimpse it.

I tried not to think of Inuyasha and the love he lost, nor of how losing me shortly after would affect him either. It hurt too much. He was finally happy, and that was stolen. Besides, Sango and Miroku were there to care for him even if I wasn't, right? Even Sesshomaru was there. Sesshomaru would fulfill his promise to his father at last, to care for a broken hearted man who once again lost everything. When would he find his happy ending? Is that tragic story bound to end in disaster every time? It hurts to think about.

The day I was able to return to the well, I wasted no time. I remember hugging my mother, wishing her and grandfather love and happiness. I remember asking her to always remind Sota how much I loved him, and how much I am happy for him. No matter what happens in life, I am always going to be his big sister; I'm proud of him. And then I was gone.

Sesshomaru was waiting for me outside the well. His hands reaching in and hauling me up the moment he could reach me. His eyes, his face. I could see the relief and happiness that once would not have been there flourish across his features. This was the Sesshomaru I knew. This was the man from those memories, so many years ago. I had hugged him tightly, and him me, swathing me in the billowing fabric of his free flowing sleeves.

He bent his head over me, his chest strong and his arms steady. He brushed his lips over the fabric of my shirt, above the scar he gave me so many years ago.

"Do you love me?" I whispered, tightening my grip on him.

His answer was quick. It was a promise that wouldn't be broken again, by neither time nor death. It was a bond that we shared, for as long as I shall live, and he shall endure.

"Yes."

 **Man, I still suck at endings. And yes, I literally glossed over/repainted some scenes from the Inuyasha end, because we all know what happens, am I right? This is me giving minor details to support your imaginations. Please, give these two lovers the perfect life. They deserve it.**

 **This is the end. Thank you all for reading.**


End file.
